Molding Children
By Inlemay
@Inlemay (17714)
South Africa
December 8, 2015 11:54pm CST
Many years ago when my children were in pre-grades before going to BIG SCHOOL, I met a woman who said she was grooming her daughter for greatness.
It seems that she herself had missed greatness by default of her sister that actually got there, and the sour grapes were evident but the drive to succeed through her daughter was powerful.
Almost 20 years later, after the daughter in question had progressed into becoming Head Girl in bother junior school and senior school and managed to have the best grades in the region - has flunked out of University due to a serious melt down and lack of interest in applying her mind to anything.
She has taken to serve drinks in a bar (for now) until some light on a vocation strikes her like a lightening bolt.
So the molding of children happens, but the eventual FINAL product will have to be the result of the passion that is of the child within.
Some people place a lot of stress on children and at this time of the year, we hear of children achieving distinctions for studying but still deciding to Hang themselves, or overdose, as the thought of Success after school is a daunting thought.
My eldest daughter received her results for her Advanced Diploma in Training Practices for Education and Training - Passed with Distinction, and I am very proud of her. She teaches Dance Studies at a Government school and now has advanced training for education purposes.
Still waiting for my youngest results - fingers crossed. 
Our children will eventually come into their own, we should just allow them to follow their dreams and support them with motivation and of course in my case - a Whip!! he he he
Our children will eventually come into their own, we should just allow them to follow their dreams and support them with motivation and of course in my case - a Whip!! he he he 19 people like this
20 responses
@nanette64 (20364)
• Fairfield, Texas
9 Dec 15
I couldn't have said that any better @MALUSE .
2 people like this
@Inlemay (17714)
• South Africa
9 Dec 15
@flapiz most parents are just trying to be helpful not knowing that they can be more harmful than ever. be brave and try and keep the peace with these kind of choices because some days a parent is still the most priceless person to take advice from.
3 people like this
@WorDazza (15833)
• Manchester, England
9 Dec 15
It's really prevalent in the UK in junior football. The number of fathers who push their sons to ridiculous lengths in the hope they will become the next David Beckham is just mad!! You can see it's removing any enjoyment the child may have been getting from playing!!
It also used to lead to my son getting dog's abuse from parents when he was refereeing!!
4 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
9 Dec 15
My sister expects perfection from her children with school work, sports and chores. It worries me for the children because they already feel stressed at 7 & 8 years old! My kids have chores but it's not a lot, their expected to get school work done but I don't demand perfection from them. I just hope I am doing enough for them and I hope her kids don't get pushed to their breaking point.
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50525)
• Centralia, Missouri
9 Dec 15
it could also be that all that pressure created the breakdown as well.
2 people like this
@poehere (15126)
• French Polynesia
9 Dec 15
Too much pressure on children is so bad. You can see this in film after film of true stories. I think that people should allow their children to achieve on their own. My niece has an older sister and she is just one that always gets top grade but she does work hard on this one. Poor thing was always compared to her older sister because it seemed she always had to follow behind. In middle school she refused to go to the same middle school as her older sister. Well in doing this she really shined and did well. Now in high school she will graduate soon and she has outstanding grade. It take a different way to teach each child. I like the idea of encouraging them but let them advance at their own speed.
2 people like this
@nanette64 (20364)
• Fairfield, Texas
9 Dec 15
You are exactly right @Inlemay . There are a lot of adults (kids) out there that are being 'forced' into being a doctor, lawyer or whatever; that they don't really want to be. The Beauty Pageant thing is one that really makes me mad. Some parents actually have facial surgery done to their kids so they can be Miss Beauty Queen.
1 person likes this
@fishtiger58 (29823)
• Momence, Illinois
10 Dec 15
I so agree and each kid is so different even when they have the same parents. My oldest struggled in school. My youngest is getting his PhD in Astro Physics. One time when they were both pretty young in middle school around 5th and 6th grade, my youngest asked why I made such a big deal about my older sons C's and didn't make as much of a big deal about his straight A's. I told him that his brother worked 10 times harder to get his C than you will ever work to get your A. I don't think he understood completely at the time, but he does now. He never had to work hard to get his excellent grades until he we to grad school. Now he is working.
1 person likes this
@hereandthere (45651)
• Philippines
9 Dec 15
i think the same thing happened to a relative of mine. everyone, including she, felt the board exam (for licensure) would be a breeze, but she failed. although they're allowed to retake it, she applied instead for work in a totally different but lucrative field, poured all her energies there and has been successful every since.
1 person likes this
@marijuana (570)
• Tel Aviv, Israel
9 Dec 15
congratulations on your children's achievements . You are right, Parents should guide and motivate their children but not giving them too much to handle.
1 person likes this
@ianwaltz (21)
• Quezon City, Philippines
9 Dec 15
raising children is not so easy, but it gives me motivation to live. ^_^
