My Mother and her friend Sue

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My mother is 74 and is a great example of why you should never assume that little old ladies are sweet little old ladies. Her friend Sue came over on Christmas Eve and since my step-father had gone to bed early with a cold, the two got a bit giggly. Sue revealed that she and Mum go to "a lot of weddings even though we're not invited". It turns out that they have a regular Saturday afternoon routine of going for coffee in the local 4 star hotel which is very popular with wedding parties. The two sit themselves on comfy chairs with a good view of the wedding guests and then 'critique' their outfits. I said I could imagine the things they'd be saying. "Does she know what she looks like?", "That needs an 'underskirt'" and then Sue told me that Mum's classic was "Does she own a mirror? or have an honest friend?" I could be confident as these are exactly the kind of things my mother said to me in my teens. My mother's observation is that too many wedding guests seem to suffer from body dysmorphia - they think that they are two sizes smaller than they really are and look like they've tried to stuff too much shopping into a bag that's too small. Luckily most of the brides do pretty well - though some are flashing rather more than might be considered appropriate in their virginal white dresses. Sue has been known to pinch the leftover cakes and sandwiches from groups who've ordered 'afternoon tea' and found they couldn't finish them. She has no shame about such things. I'm thinking of arranging to come visiting next time they're planning some wedding party observation. For those who now want to condemn this post (or Mum and Sue) for being judgemental, I can only say that we ALL judge others by how they dress and how they behave - even if we swear that we don't. The same women in the 6 inch heels, ignoring the old advice of "legs OR cleavage" and going for both, will be looking at the 'old dears' in the comfy chairs and making a ton of assumptions and judgements about them. Unless you live in Mao-era China where everybody, male or female, young or old, was wearing identical blue pyjama suits, what you wear will say something about you, even if you don't intend it to.