~It's A Mutual Dislike~

Valdosta, Georgia
January 6, 2016 12:48pm CST
As I think I have mentioned here many times I am not a fan of my husbands family at all. They are not nice people at all and they are all addicted to pain pills-which makes them very selfish and rude. When they are out of pills they become hateful, and I just don't have time for that in my life. Anyway...his niece just called MY phone and said where is Uncle Johnny? That is what I got when I answered MY phone. No hey Aunt Jennifer, no how are you-nothing. (Oh this is the same niece that stole $30 from my grandma when she sent our children birthday cards with money in them). I know none of them really like me either but it's called respect-I respect them and I'm not rude to them no matter how I feel about them. I don't appreciate the disrespect I get from them at all. I was very nice in return to her and gave her his number... No matter how rude she is, I will be the bigger person.
39 people like this
39 responses
@vandana7 (98527)
• India
6 Jan 16
How about teaching some manners like..How are you? First let me know you are alright then I will give you the number. But come to think of it, did it save you talk time? If it did, you can feel happy that even though she had no manners, you still got something in form of savings.
5 people like this
@vandana7 (98527)
• India
8 Jan 16
@ataboy ..I am with @LovingMyBabies on this. I would not react unless the person has been obviously nasty towards me not once but a few times. And in the present context, it could blow up out of proportion. I would look for something that all others would find extremely objectionable to start my sermons. If this person reacts obtusely, or in defensive, I would have the whole world on my side with one shot. Then I could if I so wished reveal how rude she used to be, which would be unnecessary of course. But picking battles is important in relationships. It is necessary to pick only those in which the person has no way to but to invite others wrath or lose support. Here, this matter will get treated as trivial. It hurts, but it still gets qualified as trivial.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@vandana7 Yeah, its not my job to teach her and if I said that she would have became more rude to me. Its just a never ending battle. Thank God she doesn't call a whole lot.
5 people like this
@ataboy (737)
• United States
8 Jan 16
Why is it not your job, @LovingMyBabies? I'm seriously asking that of you. I don't personally think that it is, but where does your belief system say that you should simply wash your hands of such things? If it's something that you might be helpful towards then why would you, Loving, not take it upon yourself to improve another? I mean that with no negative connotations, whatsoever...
1 person likes this
@DianneN (246452)
• United States
6 Jan 16
I bite my tongue over my daughter-in-law's coolness, lack of respect for her elders, and her controlling nature. If I don't, I am sure I would never see my precious grandkids again.
5 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@DianneN Yeah I have to bite my tongue with his family as well. Otherwise, there will be more problems than its worth.
4 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies For sure, these people have no regard for anything it seems.
4 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
Sorry to read also you have to bend to see your grankids Dianne, but I understand you.
3 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
Kill em with kindness. Sadly other addictions start with being addicted to prescription pain medications. I hope that this doesn't happen to your in-laws.
5 people like this
• United States
7 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies That is truly sad. If they choose not to seek help they will never get better.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@Elusivebutterfly They have been addicted for many years and as far as I know never gone to anything else. But if one day they do it wouldn't surprise me.
3 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
Hmm sorry you have to deal with these atrocious in laws. This sounds awful and I know it is hard on you but yes, no good in being rude back that is for sure. They will not listen to reason anyways being addicts like that.
5 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@TiarasOceanView Yeah their not easy to deal with at all but thank God I don't have to see or hear from them too often.
4 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies Thank God.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (455039)
• Switzerland
6 Jan 16
Very well done, do not show your sentiments, be nice and do not care of them.
5 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@LadyDuck Yeah, I am not going to get myself crazy over them. I will just vent about it here. Lol.
5 people like this
@ataboy (737)
• United States
8 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies Maybe...I'm not so sure that's the one and only ideal approach, but I admire it (Anna). I do agree with your attitude towards venting (Loving) where they are not privy to your thoughts...hopefully! You are your own person, and allowed to maintain some sanity! Especially if it does not involve them. That is were we might run into some gray areas between our agreements! But no matter!
2 people like this
@jaboUK (64363)
• United Kingdom
6 Jan 16
It must be awkward if you don't get on with your husband's family, it makes family occasions a bit fraught. Well done for being the bigger person.
5 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@Jabouk My husband barely speaks to his side of the family so we don't get together on holidays or anything.
3 people like this
@ataboy (737)
• United States
8 Jan 16
I have gotten' it on with my significant others family before, @JaboUK, so what are you trying to say...you think I'm wrong? Maybe I've misread! LOL! No, even I'm not that hideous of a beast! Although I do have this one cute cousin!....LOL! I should stop I think... No, but seriously, I did have a crush on my cousin when I was a WHOLE LOT younger! I'm sure "addy" (who is possessed by he DEvil) will be along to make fun of me soon enough! Please brace yourself my dear Loving! I needith not speakish his name!
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (157050)
• United States
6 Jan 16
It seems as if he has turned out well in spite of them.
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@GardenGerty Somehow, thank God my husband turned out amazing! Probably because he wasn't raised by them. His aunt raised him mostly after he got out of the foster care system.
3 people like this
@suzzy3 (8342)
6 Jan 16
It is not always easy to be the bigger person , well done , don't rise to their rudeness.
3 people like this
@suzzy3 (8342)
6 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies Good for you.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@suzzy3 Thank you, I am definitely not letting them bring me down to their level.
4 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
Sorry about the crappy inlaws. How does your husband feel towards them? Either way you're entitled to feel how you feel. Hope they get help for their addiction.
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@Daniegirl80587 My husband barely ever speaks to any of them. Matter of fact he was a little upset I gave his niece his number.
2 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
That's right - don't stoop to her/their level. Be the bigger person and hold your head high.
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@AbbyGreenhill Yeah I wont. No matter how much they push my buttons I just need to ignore it and do what I know is right.
5 people like this
• United States
6 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies They are hard to ignore I can imagine, but put yourself first.
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@AbbyGreenhill At times it is hard but I just bring it here and vent.
2 people like this
@amnabas (13743)
• Karachi, Pakistan
6 Jan 16
That's your great gesture and attitude.
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
6 Jan 16
@amnabas I try to be nice always-and just vent about it here.
3 people like this
@softbabe44 (5816)
• Vancouver, Washington
6 Jan 16
I got to give you thumbs up on that your very respectful others especially family should know how respect is .
4 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@softbabe44 Thank you, I just try to be nice toward others even when its hard. His family really have no respect for anyone-not even themselves.
3 people like this
• Vancouver, Washington
8 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies That's on them the way they want to act.
1 person likes this
• Vancouver, Washington
9 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies Hopefully your hubby understands what is going on.
@JudyEv (323748)
• Rockingham, Australia
7 Jan 16
It probably really gets up their nose that you're not nasty back to them - good on you!
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@Judyev Oh I'm sure it annoys them more than anything that I'm nice to them in return. Lol
3 people like this
@JudyEv (323748)
• Rockingham, Australia
7 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies So really, you could forward to meeting them and unsettling them by being super-nice.
1 person likes this
@fishtiger58 (29823)
• Momence, Illinois
7 Jan 16
I'm so sorry you have to deal with mess like this. I am going through rough times as well with my younger brother's wife. She is just a miserable person.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@fishtiger58 Thank you. I am really grateful that I don't hear from them or see them often. It would be much more difficult to deal with if I did. I'm sorry your dealing with your sister in law like this-it is not fun at all.
3 people like this
@Auntylou (4264)
• Oxford, England
7 Jan 16
@fishtiger58 It is sad when people make it hard to be with family
3 people like this
@fishtiger58 (29823)
• Momence, Illinois
7 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies No it's not and now she has the entire family upset, and most of them want nothing to do with her. I almost think that was her plan all along. So be it, she finally succeeded, but my brother is nothing like her, he is a good guy. Guess I will just have to meet him alone for coffee and stuff.
3 people like this
@bunnybon7 (50975)
• Holiday, Florida
7 Jan 16
good for you. i had that kind of mess with my first husbands family. and i in turn was still nice to them as family. when i left him, his mom was so upset with the new gf that she would call and write me about what a good daughter in law i had been and would i please get him .etc. like i really would want to...
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@bunnybon7 That's karma for them, I'm glad they don't like his new girl. Lol. My moms ex used to beat the mess out of her and put her in the hospital a few times. His new wife beats the mess out of him with all sorts of objects ~KARMA~Lol.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (133801)
• Roseburg, Oregon
7 Jan 16
It is better to be nice and ignore rude people. I do that all the time.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@jstory07 Yeah I won't go down to their level. I would rather be nice.
1 person likes this
@MALUSE (69428)
• Germany
7 Jan 16
You have a good character. The main thing is that your husband stands by you.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@Maluse Thank you, yes he definitely stands by me-especially when it comes to his family.
1 person likes this
@tuttiharris (1338)
• Chattanooga, Tennessee
7 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies (16416), some times we just have to put our feelings out of sight, and it is great when you can do that. I thank God I don't have these problems and I know it would be hard to deal with. Blessings my friend. Have a great night.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@tuttiharris I try hard to treat others how I want to be treated no matter how they are to me. Thank God we don't hear from them much and we don't see them almost ever.
2 people like this
@Bella128 (2471)
• United States
7 Jan 16
It's unfortunate how many families that don't get along with the in-laws. I had a semi-similar experience with my ex's family but I think it was mainly because I wasn't the same religion as them.
2 people like this
@Bella128 (2471)
• United States
7 Jan 16
@LovingMyBabies That's too bad.
1 person likes this
@paigea (35513)
• Canada
7 Jan 16
That is amazing that you are able to remain polite. Good for you.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
7 Jan 16
@paigea Its not always easy but I try to always be respectful.
2 people like this