Laughter Lines

Image from Pixabay
By Jabo
@jaboUK (54506)
United Kingdom
January 15, 2016 4:16pm CST
If you want a laugh I suggest you go to @mysdianait post 'Maybe It's My Bald Head' and look at the exchange between @Rosekiss and @Orson_Kart. It's hilarious. In the meantime I'll see if I can amuse you. There once was an old man called Mitch His wife was what rhymes with 'witch', She'd constantly whine That he was a swine, So he pushed her into a ditch. An old man made eyes at the nurse, Pinched her butt, which was even worse, She said ''Kindly refrain, If you do that again You'll be leaving this place in a hearse. Young Nan had a pneumatic chest, It looked good, you wouldn't have guessed She'd meddled with nature, But she got a puncture, Now she and her chest are depressed. Original limericks by Jabo.
53 people like this
46 responses
@BelleStarr (39056)
• United States
15 Jan 16
The wife of the old man named Mitch who really was not such a b..ch Said good bye old sod and gave him the nod She's now made a marital switch
21 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@BelleStarr Oh Isabelle, you get better and better! What a laugh
9 people like this
@just4him (120556)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
15 Jan 16
@BelleStarr That was great!
4 people like this
@BelleStarr (39056)
• United States
15 Jan 16
@just4him Thank you Valerie.
2 people like this
@xFiacre (4582)
• Ireland
15 Jan 16
That old man we like to call Mitch Who marred a terrible "witch" Boiled up some nettles In one of her kettles And gave her a terrible itch.
11 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@xFiacre Brilliant, I love it. Let's see if anyone else joins in
6 people like this
• United States
15 Jan 16
how'd'ja know i was'n dire need'f yer quick humor? jest loved these, ms. jabo! i confess to've actually said those very words to a fella once whilst i worked't the hospital... adore yer lil limericks - they always bring a smile, my friend. now i gotta figure out how to get to the place ya suggested, lol. big hugs!
7 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@crazyhorseladycx I didn't know whether to put the link or not, so here it is: Thanks for liking my silliness. You actually said that about the hearse? How funny! Sorry the below link does not work. The one farther down does I think.
It has to be because of something but I can't quite fathom it out yet [em]doh[/em] Maybe I should wear a dress - but offline I prefer trousers. Or maybe a...
5 people like this
• United States
15 Jan 16
@jaboUK thanks, hon :D i found it, dunno why ya gotta jump through so many danged hoops here to find such? i copied 'n pasted her handle into the search thingy 'n then had to hit "users" to do such. well worth it though. i've told 'em that 'n also a few that they ought'a be proud that i.c.u. was jest up the hall coz that's where they was fixin' to be if'n they didn't straighten up. yepperz, i'm a rebel't heart, lol.
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@crazyhorseladycx Oh, that's funny too! (I wonder if I could incorporate that into a limerick? ). Now Crazy told chaps what to do, "If you bother me, you'll find it's true. That you'll get a slap I'll not stand for your crap You'll find yourself in I.C.U."
6 people like this
@gr8nana6 (2193)
• United States
16 Jan 16
Lol I love your Limericks especially the third one of young nan's chest and I was on @mysdianait post and saw the banter there. Funny indeed and sure gave me a good giggle.
5 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@gr8nana6 Thank you Maria. Yes I saw your comment on that other post - it was an hilarious exchange wasn't it?
5 people like this
@gr8nana6 (2193)
• United States
16 Jan 16
@jaboUK Yes it sure was, it is so good to get some great laughs and interaction here on this site.
3 people like this
@Orson_Kart (4353)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
Wow, amazing how a simple reply to a comment has such an effect. Thanks for mentioning me. Glad it has given everyone a chuckle. I love your limericks and will have a go myself sometime (when I am not flirting, which is most of the time lol)
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@Orson_Kart There you go making me laugh again!. I'd love to see your take on a limerick.
4 people like this
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@jaboUK Cool. I don't know how to take you yet (if you pardon the pun) but here goes: Oh Jabo, your limericks are good I'd like to join in if I could If I get inspired And don't feel too tired I say, this has given me [i][/i]would you believe it? I should!
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@Orson_Kart Excellent till you spoilt it with the last bit. Limericks only have 5 lines.
4 people like this
• Midland, Michigan
20 Jan 16
I love it when you can get me to laugh out loud, which is what took place a second ago when reading your last one. Got to watch when fooling with mother nature. I will take a peek at your suggestion, sounds like fun. One of these days, I'd like to sit down to crank out some myself, limericks that is. I'm sure it will take me a bit to get started, and they won't roll off my page like they do for you and @asylum , but it would be fun to mess around with it. First, though, I got too much stuff to get done around here.
4 people like this
@Asylum (48273)
• Manchester, England
20 Jan 16
You will never complete one unless The task of writing one you address So do not be faint hearted Because once you have started You will be on your way to success
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
20 Jan 16
@MarshaMusselman You've done some great limericks in the past Marsha. I'm pleased if I've amused you with mine.
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
20 Jan 16
@Asylum That's true - I can't come back at you yet, too busy at the moment.
2 people like this
@garymarsh6 (14264)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
You are so good at this! They made me laugh!
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@garymarsh6 Thanks Gary, I was hoping that they'd amuse somebody
3 people like this
@garymarsh6 (14264)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@jaboUK OH well you know it does not take much to make me laugh!
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@garymarsh6 That's a bit of a back-handed compliment
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (4849)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
16 Jan 16
What rhymes with witch??? Hitch??? Snitch??? Switich??? But not of them make sense!!!!
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@GreatMartin I wonder what the word could be???
4 people like this
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
17 Jan 16
@jaboUK When you come up with the word let me know please!
2 people like this
@TheHorse (67110)
• Pleasant Hill, California
16 Jan 16
Thanks for the laugh! I love your Limericks.
4 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@TheHorse Thanks, and you are welcome.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36966)
15 Jan 16
LOL so funny, how do you do it, awesome :)
3 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@kevin877uk Thanks Kevin, but they aren't hard to do. You should give it a try sometime.
2 people like this
@kevin1877uk (36966)
15 Jan 16
@jaboUK Lol yeah maybe I should :)
2 people like this
• United States
15 Jan 16
@jaboUK lol, not hard fer yerself, ms. @BelleStarr 'n @xFiacre 'n some other folks, but i get tongue tied 'nough jest lacin' my boots :)
3 people like this
@nanette64 (17696)
• Fairfield, Texas
16 Jan 16
LMAO, ROTF, LOL, @jaboUK . What more can I say, I have to go pee now.
3 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@nanette64 Lol - Too much information there Nanette! Glad you liked it thanks.
3 people like this
@nanette64 (17696)
• Fairfield, Texas
16 Jan 16
@jaboUK At least I wasn't drinking a sip of my coffee; otherwise I'd have needed the Heimlich Manuever.
3 people like this
@SIMPLYD (80362)
• Philippines
18 Jan 16
Funny how the patient, a dirty old man pinched her nurse's butt . That always happens actually .
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
18 Jan 16
@SIMPLYD Yes, I'm sure it does happen
2 people like this
@SIMPLYD (80362)
• Philippines
19 Jan 16
@jaboUK Actually my boss , when i was still working in a bank , was walking behind me , suddenly slapped my butt ! I was surprised but just laughed it off because he is our godfather in marriage .
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
19 Jan 16
@SIMPLYD Sometimes it's best just to laugh it off
2 people like this
@celticeagle (118609)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 16
How fun. I like the second one
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@celticeagle Thanks, most people that have commented seem to prefer that one.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (118609)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 16
@jaboUK ...They have a discerning eye. haha
2 people like this
@rebelann (41952)
• El Paso, Texas
16 Jan 16
Soo funny, as usual. Now I'm off to see whatcha talkin bout in reference to @Rosekiss and @Orson_Kart , I love laughin.
2 people like this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 16
@rebelann I put the link to that post on my reply to Crazyhorseladycx. It's well worth a visit.
2 people like this
@rebelann (41952)
• El Paso, Texas
16 Jan 16
Oh yeah @jaboUK it was really funny, I'll be laughin most of the night about that.
2 people like this
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
21 Jan 16
There once was an old man called Mitch Whose wife was a bit of a catch But his chatter was boring As was his snoring now she's looking her Mitch to unhitch.
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
21 Jan 16
@Pose123 Lol - I can see that you and I are going to get along famously - you are a woman after my own heart. I love your take on this - well done.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (21650)
• Louisville, Kentucky
24 Jan 16
I wish I had your talent and I love that others have joined in also.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
24 Jan 16
@Simone10 It's great when other people have a go too, I love it. Thanks for coming back and catching up with my posts, I appreciate it.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (21650)
• Louisville, Kentucky
25 Jan 16
@jaboUK I spent all day trying to catch up with everyone yesterday.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
25 Jan 16
@simone10 It takes a while, doesn't it?
1 person likes this
@PainsOnSlate (20335)
• Canada
22 Jan 16
Thanks for the laugh. Now I 'm going to the post you suggested. Tour posts never disappoint...
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@PainsOnSlate I'm happy to make you smile, thanks. You won't be disappointed with that other post.
1 person likes this
• Canada
22 Jan 16
@jaboUK I couldn't find but won't give up looking...it's because I'm using my iPad.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
22 Jan 16
@PainsOnSlate . Ok here's the link
It has to be because of something but I can't quite fathom it out yet [em]doh[/em] Maybe I should wear a dress - but offline I prefer trousers. Or maybe a...
1 person likes this
@just4him (120556)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
15 Jan 16
I love that second one, gave me a good chuckle. They're all great.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
15 Jan 16
@just4him I'm happy that I made you chuckle, thanks.
1 person likes this
@just4him (120556)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
15 Jan 16
@jaboUK You're welcome.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (12302)
• Paso Robles, California
26 Jan 16
Thanks from adding some humor to my day before I have to write a product review - not my favorite kind of writing, but I'm committed to having one every Wednesday for a site I contribute to.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
26 Jan 16
@bagarad I appreciate you coming back to read my old posts, thank you. I'm happy that you are amused.
1 person likes this
@MALUSE (41235)
• Germany
24 Jan 16
Wonderful! Limericks are too much effort for me. I prefer reading them to composing them.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (54506)
• United Kingdom
24 Jan 16
@MALUSE In which case I'd better keep them coming