Reality Checks that leave Indelible Impression
By Shiva
@Shiva49 (26199)
Singapore
February 12, 2016 7:06am CST
We trundle along in life and find refuge in comfort zones.Then we get jolts occasionally to test our mettle but they are soon water under the bridge, forgotten. However, we face very few that leave an indelible impression to remind us how blessed we are when we go through life and death situations but manage to escape by the skin of our teeth. Those experiences can define our outlook for the rest of our lives.
I have had few that shook me, made me lose my belief in another, but I have forgiven them but cannot forget; in fact, I do not want to. It has to stay with me all through for the lessons they gave me. I have found some can be unbelievably kind and also the opposites are lurking among us. Life can be extreme in the way we are treated.
I recall one who I met only for a couple of days forty years ago. I was an executive in a company and met with a visiting consultant. He was from Germany but was working in India. We had a meeting stretching beyond midnight discussing naming our pharmaceutical products. Then we met again at 8 next morning. To my surprise, Hermann had made a detailed note of the discussions and jotted down points for follow up. I asked him – did he not sleep at night? His answer left an indelible impression on me “I sleep only for few hours when I have pressing work.” Then he continued ”I was held a prisoner in the Second World War and what I went through made me value every day in this life as heaven” .
When I go through tough times, I remember him. In fact, my father also served as a doctor in the War but he did not want to talk about that phase of his life. Maybe, his experiences were beyond words and they died with him!
How about sharing some that influenced your life?
24 people like this
19 responses
@AliCanary (3045)
•
12 Feb 16
Wow, that was a very powerful story. I was just remembering the other day an incident that occurred when I was in college. It was early in the year, and I had the window of my dorm room open to enjoy the warm weather. I heard another girl shout from her window, "Leave her ALONE!!" I looked out my own fourth-floor window, and outside on the street, I could see down into a parked car, where a man was beating his girlfriend. I ran out of my room, down the stairs, and across the street, and I grabbed that girl out of the car and put her behind me to protect her. The man got out and I was ready to do battle, but he clearly couldn't handle a woman who was willing to fight back. Someone had called the police, and they came by. Unfortunately, the lady was not willing to press charges at the time, despite all the witnesses, because most abused women are scared to deal with it. I was very disappointed by that, but I hope maybe she was able to eventually able to stand up to him and get out of that situation. He was just a whiny, worthless coward, at the bottom of it all.
7 people like this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
12 Feb 16
Glad that you were around and did come down to help. From where I come from, not many girls have the guts, though things are changing for good today here too. I pity the guy who was beating the girl. Such people are really, as you say, - worthless cowards - who believe in physical violence.
5 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
13 Feb 16
Great that you stood up to the bully. Live and let live is hardly practiced in reality. I look around and see so much of hypocrisy that hold us down - we are only cheating ourselves and we know it!
There are role models everywhere and they are the real heroes not one who talk and preach. I have seen women of earlier generations who were illiterate but had more wisdom and survival skills. They lose many a battle but win the war of life fighting against all odds. I take this opportunity to bow my head in gratitude - they made us see the light of the day. May their tribe increase! siva
5 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
14 Feb 16
@JudyEv Lot of wars are instigated by those who gain from them. Why supply arms to all and sundry and then cry out that they are in "wrong hands". Now major powers are competing to supply latest, state of the art weapons and even fighting in places like Syria to extend their sphere of influence. Why not a joint operation under the aegis of the UN? Sadly the politicians are puppets in the hands of 1% while the 99% want peace - siva
4 people like this
@divalounger (5849)
• United States
13 Feb 16
It is difficult to imagine how difficult it must have been for this man--war is a terrible thing--It sounds as though he treasured his time after that experience and it sounds as though you have learned to do the same--
4 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
14 Feb 16
I love to hear from such people. I have met few who came through "hell" but their children live in luxury. One such I met in Dubai and he said his children will never understand as they were brought up in comfort.
During wars one never knows what will be last day and how horribly they can die. It is well possible to live in peace if major powers come together but they make merry at the cost of the 99%. To start with we should defang ourselves with disarmament.
The hypocrisy lies in denying others Weapons of Mass Destruction while you don't want to give up on them ! Does it not mean master/slave relationship? siva
3 people like this
@RonElFran (1214)
• Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania
12 Feb 16
To have lived through the kind of experiences Hermann did can't help but give a deeper appreciation for every day of life. How many of us take our days for granted?
5 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
13 Feb 16
I recall many heroes in my life. I too keep a smiling face even in times of adversities - they are nothing when compared to what few are going through. People like Hermann, including my late father, took everyday as a blessing and that nothing is assured, cast in stone - siva
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
19 Feb 16
Yes, they fought against heavy odds to raise us and see that we are secure. They did what needed to be done - let all generations build on what they are given for a better and more humane world. We know what wars can do for us - there are no winners in the end - siva
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45123)
• Canada
15 Feb 16
My father was also a soldier during WW2 and would only say very little about what happened. His faith in God was shaken but in time realized that God had nothing to do with the war.
3 people like this
@Dragonairy1 (1722)
• Newcastle Upon Tyne, England
14 Feb 16
I think many things can leave an impression for good or bad.
3 people like this
@garymarsh6 (23393)
• United Kingdom
14 Feb 16
War can leave unimaginable memories on those affected by it. Your poor father must have faced some horrific sights during the war. Changi prison is quite a poignant reminder of the war.
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
15 Feb 16
I can only wonder what he really went through. He was in Indonesia, Yemen and Egypt. Upon qualifying as a doctor he enlisted due to family commitments. I asked him but he said better that he did not want to go back to those times. One friend of his told me people were dying all around them and, sometimes, they could do nothing to save them!
Yes Changi prison is a reminder about the horrors of war. One reminisced those times. The Japanese were dismissed as "shorties" by the British, but they did pack a punch and punched much above their weight and height! I also met few who were members of Indian National Army under Bose, but left forlorn after the war - siva
2 people like this
@JamesHxstatic (29242)
• Eugene, Oregon
13 Feb 16
Your story and the ones related in comments are inspiring. In all my years, I can think of no equal experiences.
4 people like this
@innertalks (21020)
• Australia
15 Feb 16
This discussion prompted me to ask myself if I have I ever experienced any tough times in my life, that I would consider tough enough for me to question reality, and so as a result of this, it has helped me to reach into an even greater reality, as a result of my having had this experience.
Some reality checks do not really increase our reality that much, that is when we are fixated too much on the one that we have already, but the best reality checks can jolt us, and catapult us, right out of this old reality, into a whole new reality, at times.
I had a bit of a reality check a few years ago when I was bashed by an angry thug. This was not from the bashing itself, but more from the way that I escaped being killed on that day.
Some unknown power entered me from somewhere, as I was lying semi-conscious on the cement floor, bleeding profusely from a wound on my head, where he had already hit me with his baseball bat, and as the huge monstrous guy was just about to lay into me again, this time with his size sixteen inch boots.
I only said one word to him, which was the word, "STOP".
It must have been how I said it. (I remember that I did hold up my hand in a stop sign too though.)
The power and authority coming through me into that word, from what appeared to me to be from another reality, stopped this monster in his tracks.
He visibly shook in his boots, looked at me again, confusedly, and then turned around, and high-tailed it away.
The villain's previous reality had been shattered, and mine was also opened up much wider on that day too.
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
15 Feb 16
That is two birds with one stone, Steve. The thug lost it and you gained in the process!
I have had couple of instances when I bottled up my emotions and then had to let them rip. One was at a workplace when the lady boss was unrelenting in her usual ways and I just blew my lid. My colleague said the color of my face just changed! I said "please understand I am only helping you; if you persist with your ways, out I go and I will be free and you have only yourself to blame" Then she was a changed person but just for few days; a leopard cannot change its spots!
I feel it a blessing to meet few who elevate our thinking by setting an example - I keep a smiling face whatever the issues I face as there is some light at the end of the tunnel even if it is from an oncoming train - then all problems get solved! Then few who we meet as their ways remind us how we should not be like them! siva
2 people like this
@innertalks (21020)
• Australia
15 Feb 16
@Shiva49 We all have our breaking point. That also happened to me once, when my face changed to red like that too.
It was also a workplace incident, where the guy had been needling me for many years, and he finally added the final needle that broke through to me, and caused me to act.
He was always rifling my hair, or trying to bodily lift me up, to remove me from his floor. This day he ripped my tie off of me. I hit him three times in the face with an open slap, all so very quickly that I really did not know what I had just done.
He learnt his lesson though. He stopped pestering me after that. He was so surprised, and I was lucky, as everybody there supported my side of it, not his.
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
15 Feb 16
@innertalks Talking about gong beyond breaking point, I recall one when I had completed Intermediate stage exams of CA course.
There was one account that none was willing to touch even with a barge pole; it was kept for me to tackle just because only I had the patience to complete the audit and tax returns. As soon as I walked in after the exams, the person in charge started pestering me. I told him let me settle down but he wanted me to start then and there. I told him to take the job and ....
But the big boss sided with him that it was very urgent but I told him, why then wait for a month for me to come? But those days the boss was always right and I told them I needed time to do a proper job; it was all very unfair to me - siva
2 people like this
@allknowing (130066)
• India
11 Mar 16
There are turning points in our life which at that time may seem desperate but they are the ones that show us the way for a better tomorrow. I have had those turning points. Today I am a liberated soul that puts me in the attitude of gratitude every moment of the day.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130066)
• India
11 Mar 16
@Shiva49 I have cut down on my expectations to almost zero and when I get something then I take it as bonus.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
11 Mar 16
I have had "you too Brutus" moments that made me face the extremes of human nature. And also times when all doors closed on me but I managed to get a toehold in openings that I had to prise open. These added to my resolve that life is tough going - we have to fight as we come alone, leave alone in the end.
I also have reached a level where I do not allow others to make me unhappy with their cutting remarks - they just follow their path to learn the lessons as we all do here - siva
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
12 Mar 16
@allknowing That is the attitude and approach I take as human nature is fickle and quite unpredictable - siva
1 person likes this
@sofssu (23662)
•
16 Feb 16
I guess, for me it was a time when I received a verdict from my doctor saying that I might not be able to walk or carry my new born for the rest of my life. I decided that I would not only walk or carry my baby but live life to the fullest. It was a moment great revelation to me.
1 person likes this
@Sheilamarie78 (2586)
• Canada
15 Feb 16
Experiences that have fear in them do that to us. Also ones when we experience deep love.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26199)
• Singapore
15 Feb 16
They realize that they could have as well perished and also seeing man's inhumanity to man. My father was able to contribute much later with two degrees from England, one a PhD in Microbiology. But his stint in the war was hardly discussed by him - siva
1 person likes this
