You're Not Getting What I'm Saying

@just4him (113259)
Green Bay, Wisconsin
March 12, 2016 3:05pm CST
I just hate it when people misunderstand me. Some of my comments it seems have touched off a point of conflict, which I never meant to happen. Sometimes I will take an opposite point of view to show there might be a different side to something. That doesn't mean I don't agree the situation is bad, I just want people to think about it from another angle. When I was growing up, my mother said I talked backwards - meaning I would say things opposite to what I really meant, and had to rethink my words. Believe me it wasn't a compliment, and I find myself having to try to explain things in ways people will understand and HOPE they understand what I'm saying. I've been made to feel worthless for the things I said, and I don't like that feeling. It's not that I don't agree with you, I just want to give you food for thought. I really hope you understand.
42 people like this
43 responses
@Hatley (164671)
• Garden Grove, California
12 Mar 16
Sometimes think its not what you are saying but the lazy way some will interpret what y ou said. Its not your fault at all. Tey need to listen with all their ears and think when they read before jumping to the wrong conclusion.Im sorry some made you feel worthleess as thats all wrong
9 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
It was growing up that I was made to feel worthless. Nobody here has done that.
6 people like this
@Hatley (164671)
• Garden Grove, California
12 Mar 16
@just4him yes the p eople around yo as a child c an really do things to you they talked about me being bashful and made me think t was something r eallhy terrible about me later I found out it meant beng shy darn them sorry for the goof
3 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
@Hatley People can really make you feel you are what you're not. You might want to check this comment. I don't think you wanted to swear here, but I don't know what it's supposed to be.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (121671)
• United States
12 Mar 16
i understand your point here. Often times i don't understand something and I like when the person will clarify it better for me. Thanks
8 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
I used to need to do that a lot when I was growing up because people would look at me strange and I would need to explain it all over again.
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (121671)
• United States
12 Mar 16
@just4him Which can be very nerve wrecking at times.
3 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
@sharon6345 Yes it can.
3 people like this
@jaboUK (53541)
• United Kingdom
12 Mar 16
I'm sorry if you've been misunderstood, but this is supposed to be a discussion site, we don't have to agree with everything someone else has said. As long as we put our point of view across in a reasonable manner there should be no reason for anyone to take offence.
7 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
It's not the fact it's a discussion site, I get that. And I get that we don't all need to agree. It's that I get misunderstood in what I'm trying to convey. No offense taken.
4 people like this
@paigea (21974)
• Canada
12 Mar 16
I like getting food for thought. I don't need everyone to agree with me.
6 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
I don't need anyone to agree with me. I just want them to understand me.
4 people like this
@paigea (21974)
• Canada
13 Mar 16
@just4him Well understanding can be a problem at times. I know.
4 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
@paigea Yes it can.
3 people like this
@Mike197602 (13366)
• Worcester, England
12 Mar 16
If someone takes something wrongly just explain until they get it.
5 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
I tried and gave up.
5 people like this
@Mike197602 (13366)
• Worcester, England
12 Mar 16
@just4him trying is the main thing. if they aren't getting it then there isn't much else you can do.
4 people like this
@mommaj (22726)
• United States
12 Mar 16
@just4him If you tried to explain and they still don't get it and you get so frustrated you have to give up it sounds like they are too close minded not only to see what is in front of them but also to listen to someone else's reasons. They get it in their head one way and just won't change. Which is a little ignorant since you are the one that said it. LOL I hope you understand this because it came out a little jumbled.
5 people like this
• United States
12 Mar 16
I understand. However, I cna also imagine that when people are in a bad situation, regardless of your intentions, if you tell them things they don't want to hear (even for their own good) they tend to become defensive.
5 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
Yes they do.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (25386)
• United States
12 Mar 16
You have never said anything that offended me. Food for thought is a good thing.
5 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
Yes it is.
2 people like this
@moffittjc (42126)
• Gainesville, Florida
13 Mar 16
I value diversity of opinions, and welcome contrarian thoughts! What I often don't like, though, is the antagonistic way our country has become when people disagree with each other. It used to be that we could disagree and still respect each others opinions; nowadays, if someone doesn't agree 100% with what you say, then they attack you and tell you that you are wrong and that you're a bad person and that you are going to hell and that the entire world is going to collapse, all because of your "wrong" opinion on something they disagree with. I wish we could get back to a simpler time when we could all carry on a respectful conversation with each other even when disagreeing on things.
3 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
I totally agree. Agreeing to disagree is a concept that has gone by the wayside. Now people are prone to jump down your throat and let you know how stupid you are for even having the thought.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (42126)
• Gainesville, Florida
13 Mar 16
@just4him And it's such a shame that it is that way now, because we can't even have civil conversations anymore! No wonder the world has become such a violent place!
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
14 Mar 16
@moffittjc Yes, we're all fearful someone might bring charges against us just for saying something they didn't like.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (76157)
• United States
12 Mar 16
Don't worry about me. I like food for thought. Not everyone agrees with things written here. I don't mind, just as long as they don't nasty about it.
3 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
True. The nasty's can stay away.
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16718)
• Ireland
12 Mar 16
oh my, I do hope this misunderstanding clears up
3 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
I'm sure it will.
2 people like this
@allknowing (63399)
• India
13 Mar 16
If you feel you are not enjoying an interaction I think you should move on and leave that discussion there. I do that. We are here to unwind and if someone rubs us the wrong way then it's their problem.
2 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
It's not that I don't enjoy the interaction, I do. But when all else fails, yes, I leave it.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (63399)
• India
13 Mar 16
@just4him I am talking about an interaction where you are not comfortable.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
@allknowing I leave those as well.
• United States
13 Mar 16
Misunderstanding you is totally different from not agreeing with you. There are discussions I've read where the person did not give enough information for it to make sense. In that case, there were misunderstandings about what that person wrote. That stuff happens a lot.
2 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
Yes it does. I never know how to answer a post like that.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (98147)
• United States
13 Mar 16
I think if people read you consistently they will understand this and not get bent out of shape over what they decide you might mean.
2 people like this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
For the most part I see that. Just every once in a while I feel like pulling out my hair because I feel like no matter what I say I'm not being clear enough.
1 person likes this
@rosekiss (30277)
• Eugene, Oregon
13 Mar 16
Everyone has a right to their opinion in here, and we should all be respected for them as well. I hope I have never misunderstood you, as that wasn't my intention, and if I did, I apologize. I love interacting with you and others so much. I hope to continue to do so, for as long as I can.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
No, we're good.
1 person likes this
@rosekiss (30277)
• Eugene, Oregon
13 Mar 16
@just4him We sure are, as we interact as much as we can, and that is a good thing. I am so grateful for all those how do interact with me, as it has helped me receive what I have, and just a few cents away from the minimum.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
14 Mar 16
@rosekiss I'm getting there. I still have just over a dollar to go.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
17 Mar 16
I don't think I've ever misunderstood something you said, but when I'm not sure about something, I'll usually ask for clarification as I've done before. I know that someone here made a post about something someone else said rather than asking them for an explanation. It caused the other part to leave the site. I'm sure that person will be missed.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
17 Mar 16
It's sad when that happens.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
17 Mar 16
@just4him Yes, and it was all of a sudden too. I couldn't get them to wait it out awhile first before leaving so hastily.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
17 Mar 16
@MarshaMusselman I know someone who just left suddenly. Would that be the person?
1 person likes this
@Deepizzaguy (12243)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
18 Mar 16
I feel your pain. Since I admire the comedy material of old school comedians like the Three Stooges, Laurel and Hardy I get hate mail like "Grow up." Some people just do not like clean comedy anymore just the whiners.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
19 Mar 16
I used to love the Three Stooges. Now people are even inciting they are too violent.
1 person likes this
@Deepizzaguy (12243)
• Lake Charles, Louisiana
19 Mar 16
@just4him It is a shame that people cannot enjoy old fashioned comics from the Great Depression era.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
20 Mar 16
@Deepizzaguy We have a comic book shop here where people can find just about anything. My younger son has been there many times.
1 person likes this
@Vjvals (935)
• Roseville, California
12 Mar 16
Some might be used to getting a lot of negative comments and therefore could be more sensitive as to the wording. Personally, I like seeing things from another perspective as long as the person is tactful. Also the reader should take into account how the person comments with others then they won't be as sensitive
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
It wasn't a negative comment. In fact I don't make negative comments or rude ones either. I just like to give another side of the equation once in a while. A different point of view.
@Vjvals (935)
• Roseville, California
13 Mar 16
@just4him Don't take it verbatim. Understand the intention. Mine aren't bad, ever. That's why I mentioned that some might be used to getting negative comments and May inadvertently read a different point of view in a negative way. I noticed with most of your comments you always put a positive somewhere in there like a compliment on something or the part agreed upon and that makes all the difference. Sometimes though (Not you) but some like to argue not on the actual points but just to argue and win. It's like wearing the scarlet letter.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
@Vjvals No good ever came from being negative. The saying is you attract more flies with honey than vinegar. I do my best with each interaction and hope for the best.
@CRK109 (14465)
• United States
12 Mar 16
How sad for you! I used to go through the same thing with Britt sometimes. He would say things and I would misunderstand. And then the explanation would take forever and he'd get frustrated and I'd apologize because I never meant to make him feel badly. I think it was because we were from different parts of the country and we spoke a bit differently. In the long run, we learned a lot about one another! xoxo
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
It really is hard to be misunderstood.
1 person likes this
@CRK109 (14465)
• United States
12 Mar 16
@just4him I've always found you easy to understand so I hope your problems with this issue are at an end.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
13 Mar 16
@CRK109 Me too.
@Bluedoll (17071)
• Canada
12 Mar 16
You write very clearly and make your points well. Its not you. So what if people disagree about something. They don't understand me either.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Mar 16
Thank you for that. I don't have a problem with understanding you.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (17071)
• Canada
20 Mar 16
I understand what you mean by just wanting to give something as you said food for thought. My question is so how will God bring peace to the earth? We don’t know the future but discussing can only lead to our appreciation of God if we discuss what is in the bible properly. Not everyone shares the same beliefs but my questions are directed to the folks that believe Jesus is coming in the near future and God’s kingdom will be established firmly on earth. Will there be a world government with representatives from a religious organization that will rule the world? Will all governments cease to exist? Will most or all of the world be destroyed? Will everything be the same as it is now only more peaceful? Does the end of world mean nothing more than a spiritual event and on earth business as usual? These are only questions. I haven’t stated what I believe in the last paragraph. The questions are just food for thought. Your post @just4him was about not being understood. That is how I felt while interacting with mommaj. She wasn’t understanding my reason for my questions and what I really wanted to discuss. Instead she took decided I think to make some kind of moral judgement. I never asked for help with my spirituality or advice in what should do with my life. Yet for some reason perhaps she thought that was why I was posting? In any event I don’t want or need some suggestion from some remote person on line telling me I should volunteer or look in my heart. I am here discuss topics. That’s it. If people don’t understand that I might not be able to do much about it. People love to talk about God and Jesus but do they understand what is going to happen? I think not.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
20 Mar 16
@Bluedoll I agree with you. The discussion got a bit off track, which a lot of discussions have a tendency to do. When people don't understand about God and Jesus as our Savior, there are more thoughts and ideas than from those who do understand what the Bible says. So I take it with a grain of salt. A lot of your questions - paragraph 2 - are answered in Revelation. When Jesus returns it will be only a single government - his. That's what I'm waiting for.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Mar 16
If people don't underSTAND me, then I just sit on them.
1 person likes this
@just4him (113259)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
16 Mar 16
Good thinking
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Mar 16
@just4him Hey, you work with what you got, and you do what works.
1 person likes this