Scarey Saturday

@Dena91 (3791)
United States
March 21, 2016 9:05am CST
Saturday was pretty much an ordinary day for us. We both studied for our Sunday school lessons, watched some television. A day to relax, our kind of day. Then our niece called before I started making dinner. Mike's dad had fallen at the store and had to be taken by ambulance to the hospital. Our hearts sank as we just watched 2 dear friends pass from falls in their homes in Jan.. When we got to the hospital we had to wait to see him as Mom and Mike's sister were back with him. They came out and we went in. He had a lot of abrasions and bruises. We were concerned with the egg size knot on his head. After a cat scan and x rays we were relieved to find that his cuts and bruises were his only injuries. We are thankful as we know it could have been a lot worse than it was. And we are still very concerned as he has been falling a lot more. This was his first fall away from home. This summer will mark 2 years since Mike retired. This was Dad's 7th fall during that time and by far his worst one. I tried talking with Mike's Mom to get her to talk with his doctor but she doesn't think there is anything wrong. She thinks he just gets into too much of a hurry. I believe there is some truth in that, however he still has cancer in his bladder (he has refused anymore treatment for it) and other medical issues. I want to know if there are any underlying medical conditions making him so unsteady when he walks. I like to be the best advocate for them as I can be. How about you? Do you want to know what is going on with a loved one so you can make the best decisions with them or for them when they are sick? Hope that you have a blessed day.
12 people like this
12 responses
@Susan2015 (19210)
• United States
21 Mar 16
Telling the doctor about all the falls would be a good thing. Glad that he didn't get a concussion from falling.
4 people like this
@GardenGerty (92230)
• Marion, Kansas
21 Mar 16
I see you say he has bladder cancer. Not sure how that relates, but in nursing homes when residents begin falling a lot they look for a urinary tract infection. Also when there are big mood changes. You need to be speaking up for them. Like I said, I do not know if bladder cancer does the same as a UTI, but it is something to look into.
3 people like this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
21 Mar 16
He does get UTI's because of the cancer. My fear is that the cancer will get into his lymph nodes and spread. He has had other cancer about 4-5 years ago and was treated with chemotherapy. Then bladder cancer came about 2 years ago. He had several operations and chemo placed into the bladder. When he went back for his check up after the chemo being put in, the cancer was back but not as bad. The doctor wanted to take it out and put more chemo in. Dad refused. The doctor told him what can happen by not dealing with it and Dad still refused. He also has diabetes, high blood pressure and is legally blind. We had a friend who also had cancer which got into his lymph nodes and it spread throughout his body. We lost him 4 years ago today.
2 people like this
@AnneEJ (5102)
• Dollard-Des-Ormeaux, Quebec
21 Mar 16
That is good that he was not seriously injured, but there must be something that is causing him to fall.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (126136)
• Switzerland
21 Mar 16
I do not believe that the cancer in his bladder can be the cause of his walking conditions. I think it would be a good idea to discuss with the doctor to find out what is the reason.
3 people like this
@jaboUK (51419)
• United Kingdom
26 Mar 16
I understand your concern but while both your parent's-in-law are 'compos mentis' you have to leave the decisions to them. That shouldn't stop you giving them advice of course.
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
26 Mar 16
That's what we do, talk with them but ultimately the decisions are theirs to live with. Have a blessed day
1 person likes this
@DianneN (62665)
• United States
25 Mar 16
Of course we want to help make the best decisions for our loved ones, but only they can be responsible for their health. My dad decided to let nature take its course when he had cancer, refusing treatment. We wanted him to have the treatment, although it would maybe give him only 6 more weeks. It's so sad. I hope things work out for the best for him. Prayers sent and hugs.
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
26 Mar 16
Thank you. It is difficult to watch them lose their health. Have a blessed evening
1 person likes this
• Stanton, Kentucky
22 Mar 16
It's so hard to know what to do. Our parents are usually reluctant to admit pain or worry because they feel it's their job to shield us and also because they want to be independent. Praying for guidance for you all.
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
23 Mar 16
thank you for the prayers, we can certainly use them. Yes I think they feel they would lose their independence even though we've always told them we want the best quality of life for them at home. Have a blessed day
@Tampa_girl7 (22180)
• United States
21 Mar 16
My parents keep things to themselves. This is very frustrating.
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
21 Mar 16
Mike's parents do too which is frustrating. We talked with them yesterday and today and he says he feels fine. Though he is moving slower and in pain he won't tell anyone. We can look at him and know what's going on.
@Corbin5 (84905)
• United States
21 Mar 16
I was Power of Attorney for my mother and I am also Power of Attorney for my Dad who we be age 95 in two months. My mom lived to age 92. I have siblings, but all decisions regarding their care are made by me since I somehow got roped into being POA. I consult my sister regarding my decisions, but my older brother I do not consult because he has gone to great lengths to keep himself free of the care of our parents. It seems that there is something going on that may be responsible for those falls and the great number of them in such a short period of time would have me making an appointment with a doctor for my loved one to determine any medical issues that could be causing those falls. I have done that in the past and was able to keep both my parents independent for a very long time. Good luck with this!
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
21 Mar 16
If it were up to us we would but Mom has POA now as she is in good health. Until that changes all we can do is talk with her and encourage her to seek answers. Thankful you have your sister to help you with decisions. We have Mike's sister and brother to help when the time comes.
@gudheart (12790)
22 Mar 16
Glad to hear that the knock on the head was nothing too serious, but you could be right the cancer could be making him weak and making him loose balance.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (29608)
• United States
21 Mar 16
Aww how scary. I am glad he wasn't badly injured but I would worry as well why he falls so often. I think they should run some tests to find out if anything else is going on to cause it.
1 person likes this
@just4him (95743)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
21 Mar 16
I hope your mom isn't in some kind of denial about his problem with falling. I say that because Dad was always in denial regarding Mom and her state of health. I'm glad it's not worse than it was and hope there isn't any underlying problem you need to worry about, but since it's happening more frequently, I would try to find out about any underlying trouble.
@Dena91 (3791)
• United States
22 Mar 16
She is to a degree Valerie. When he was going through the cancer both times she didn't want to know everything that would be going on with him. She doesn't want to know how bad it can be. We try and talk with her but she has power of attorney over him and in her right mind. All we can do is pray, and talk with her and ask questions when we are with them at the doctor's. I want ot be the best advocate as I possibly can be for our loved ones.
1 person likes this
@just4him (95743)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
22 Mar 16
@Dena91 That's the best you can do. I hope she realizes there could be an underlying problem with all his falling.