Do you help your friends with a place to stay if needed...

@sharon6345 (108804)
United States
April 19, 2016 8:36am CST
I have always helped a friend in need. However,the time has come where I see things a little differently now. I am fighting a battle with myself at this point. I am struggling with needing to have my space. Far more times then I can count I need it to be quiet. My dear friend has a 9 month old sweet heart. I would not be able to hear him crying non stop. She wants her boyfriend to stay here with her. I am not comfortable with the fact he is getting out of prison today. It's not my business what he was there for but,I don't feel comfortable with that. I heard her say a few times she really needs help. She was mainly concerned about him coming over when we were discussing her moving in. I wanted to say yea for me to be able to get out of needing to be around quiet and stuff. But,now I am stuck on her man being here. I love the comforts of being dressed like this and this could not happen with a man around as well. This part i did tell her already. Should this be the case with you would you help your friend?
9 people like this
13 responses
@toniganzon (44603)
• Philippines
19 Apr 16
I would refuse help if there's a man with her. And in that situation, I don't even know the man personally so no no. If i knew the man before and had a close relationship with him too, probably i would let them both in. But a stranger is a stranger. Can't have him in my house.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I don't know him at all. And his track record with her is not good even though I hate to judge. Thanks.
2 people like this
@gudheart (12775)
19 Apr 16
Sure, if they needed a place to stay and they were a good friend I would let them stay over for a few weeks until they find a place of their own.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
That is very nice of you. I want to do the right thing too. thanks.
2 people like this
@akalinus (12531)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I have helped friends with a place to stay. I found my friend and her daughter living in an abandoned house with no utilities so I invited her to stay with us. So she and the girl came. Then the other daughter moved in with her baby. We found my friend's son sleeping on the steps of a building so he got added. She was finally able to rent a house to stay in. I was blessed with a house, I can't let my friends be homeless.
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
My friend has a nice place to live right now. She has no privacy and she wants to be closer to her family and friends that she will get from being here.
1 person likes this
@miniam (9272)
• Bern, Switzerland
19 Apr 16
You are so kind to have helped so much.
1 person likes this
@akalinus (12531)
• United States
19 Apr 16
@miniam She is a very dear friend. I probably would not have invited a stranger to stay.
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Apr 16
As you know we are helping our friends right now with a place to stay. But I do understand where your coming from with wanting quiet and also not wanting the boyfriend there, its your place and your choice-nothing wrong with any decision you make.
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I did know that and I am happy that things are going well for you. I don't think it would go that swell for me.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
20 Apr 16
@sharon6345 I think you know what you have to choose for your own sanity and happiness.
@irishidid (8525)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I wouldn't but you have to do what you feel is right.
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
That is what I would feel is right. But,I would not want to be in the same position and she say no to me.
1 person likes this
19 Apr 16
I have helped a lot of friends in staying at my house while they are looking for a place. But keeping their friends at my house is not a good idea. And with the prison background, there is a definite no from me. I think the man should stay at his friends for time being.
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
That is why I am thinking to say no,plus my friends and family will worry about me.
1 person likes this
@ShyBear88 (16919)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I wouldn't want someone that just got out of jail that I don't know staying with me. Even if they are together with one of my friends. I'm fine helping a friend out as long as it's okay with my husband but they can't stay more then two. Ignites in the house we have.
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
Think I am going to leave her where she is because,it's the best option for me.
1 person likes this
@ShyBear88 (16919)
• United States
20 Apr 16
@MGjhaud (20799)
• Philippines
19 Apr 16
thats a bit tough.. i have never refused a request like that specially if my friend really needs help but if a stranger with a scary record like that will come too, then i'll probably think twice. maybe i'll ask a common friend if they can take them in. or probably help her pay for a motel or something..
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
She has a current place to stay here would suite her better.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (61021)
• Roseburg, Oregon
19 Apr 16
I always help friends when they need help. Sometimes I wish I did not.
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I know it could come back to bite us right.
@Hate2Iron (7299)
• Canada
19 Apr 16
For a little while but with rules that have to be followed!
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
That would be good for you.. thanks.
• Stanton, Kentucky
19 Apr 16
I would have the same reservations you have, especially about her boyfriend being around a lot. If she has a place to live, I don't really see that you should disrupt your life so much, just so things are more convenient for the two of them.
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I don't know if there would also be traffic of any kind in an out of here. I refused my own child coming home due to that.
@akalinus (12531)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I would let the friend and the baby stay but the man would need to make other arrangements. You can't trust someone who just got out of prison. You have your family's safety to think about.
@sharon6345 (108804)
• United States
19 Apr 16
I already know it's not happening if he can't come over. She really wants a family setting with him now that he's home.
@miniam (9272)
• Bern, Switzerland
19 Apr 16
It`s good to help friends but you should be able to say no if you don't feel comfortable with it.We don't always have to say yes to be friends