Does it matter where and when we are born?

Fact of life
@Shiva49 (13966)
Singapore
April 26, 2016 11:07pm CST
One of the biggest puzzles is where and when we are born after why. We cannot choose our parents so our choices follow thereafter. We have to make the best of our circumstances than live in constant misery and gripe. I have observed where we are born hardly makes a difference to how we live – we can still live on our terms once we find our feet. In fact, the harder the initial years the smoother become the later years. Tough upbringing makes us get used to the realities of life earlier than for others who are molly-coddled. Most that made it in life were not born with a silver spoon in their mouths. It is more to do with their focus and will to make it big in whatever they chose to do. Some were deprived right from birth but that only made them strive harder. At the other extreme are few who enjoyed a charmed life only to lose it all later. Then there are the few who rose to the pinnacle and the way down looked daunting and they chose to quit than face the reality that looked quite ordinary. They enjoyed the climb but descending was depressing! Some very wealthy like Warren Buffet and Bill Gates have shown the way to give back to society from where all their wealth were sourced to start with. They want to do that in a hurry or at least make it clear to their progenies that it is good for them to carve out their own lives to find enduring meaning. I feel it is good to start with just enough and then build from there. I recall the words of Randy Pausch “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” It is up to us to make life a level playing field eventually. What is your take on this that affects us all?
12 people like this
11 responses
@jaboUK (55053)
• United Kingdom
27 Apr 16
Children today seem to have so much, and are not deprived of anything, in the more affluent countries. It makes me wonder if they will learn to strive for anything when they are adults, or will they continue to expect everything to be handed to them on a plate. When I was born we had so little (wartime England), that I have always been grateful for anything that has come my way.
4 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
It is necessary that every generation has to undergo some stages of hardship to understand life better. My father used to say if we miss our breakfast we enjoy our lunch more! Though never in poverty I know what deprivation means and I am happy that technology has benefited even those at the lowest rungs in society. I see everyone with mobile phones. Earlier many did not have access to phones and had to wait for weeks to get information about their families. Now all are sporting gadgets and "online" with their dear ones far away in a jiffy. I do wonder how the future will turn out and how prepared are our younger generation to face harsh times. But they should adapt if it comes to that. Last month I was in the southern tip of India and it was baking hot but when I looked around I saw babies, few months old, up and about but under their mothers' care - siva
3 people like this
@jaboUK (55053)
• United Kingdom
27 Apr 16
@Shiva49 As you say, I suppose they will adapt.
2 people like this
@just4him (127164)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
28 Apr 16
I agree with your quote. We can't change the hand we're dealt, but there are many ways to play the hand. I've done the best I can with what life has dealt me. I'm still persevering and hoping for even better results.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
28 Apr 16
We should never forget to count the blessings - we are all more than blessed. I wish you success though your perseverance; the best is yet to be - siva
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (39652)
• United States
27 Apr 16
I agree we have no control over the circumstances that we are born into but after that our choices form who we are
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
28 Apr 16
It is natural to lament about family situations but I feel children should be motivated to strive irrespective of financial situations they find themselves in. The lower the base they start their lives in terms of financial means the more the fulfillment they get whatever they achieve in life.I admire the "self-made" success. I recall reading about a young boy working at a tea stall in India. He used to tell he wanted to be the next "BIGGAY" (Bill Gates)! Another was how computers were made available to children from deprived families and they soon found their way around without any guidance. The hunger to get ahead was palpable - siva
2 people like this
@bunnybon7 (37400)
• Holiday, Florida
27 Apr 16
I think you are absolutely right and with age comes this knowledge for most. a few never get it though
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
28 Apr 16
Many have the hunger to succeed, make their mark, all their lives. I have seen those who get a good degree slow down while some who had to start work at an early age are keen to learn all their lives - siva
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35606)
• United States
27 Apr 16
Very true we cannot change the cards we were dealt. We just make the most of our talents and go from there.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
Yes, we are given a chance to prove our mettle and then it is up to us to take off to wherever we choose to - siva
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (176079)
• Switzerland
27 Apr 16
I agree, I do not believe that where we are born matters. What really matters is how we plan our life and how hard we fight to reach the top.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
It depends more on our attitude that decides our altitude. The beauty in creation is there is beauty and meaning everywhere even in a desolate desert. It is up to us to reach out, adapt, and build on - siva
2 people like this
@cherigucchi (4866)
• Philippines
27 Apr 16
What I think matters is where we are going.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
Yes, we should learn from the past to have a better understanding of which direction to take - siva
1 person likes this
@sol_cee (17330)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
27 Apr 16
'The harder the initial years the smoother become the later years.' - totally agree. And the opposite also applies.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
Thanks, I have seen many from deprived families climb the ladder of success faster as they are driven by hunger to survive and catch up with those ahead. Life ends up more like in the hare and tortoise story - siva
2 people like this
@innertalks (4512)
• Australia
28 Apr 16
"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” Randy Pausch . Is this really always true though? What about those who were born with an ace of spades, and never knew what was in their hand, so went chasing after other fortunes, instead of living from the gift that they already had, and using that spade to dig the diamonds up from their own field? Can we change one of the cards in our hands then, or not? The founder of Reiki,Mikao Usui, changed his hand by forcing God's hand. He meditated for twenty one days unrelentlessly, until God gave him the gift of healing through sending him a changing light, that created this gift in him then, which he retained for the rest of his life. "This was in March, 1922, and at midnight of the twenty-first day of his meditation, that a powerful light suddenly entered his mind through the top of his head and he felt as if he had been struck by lightning; this caused him to fall unconscious." He had been prepared to die for this gift, as was Buddha once too. Perhaps it is the Lord of karma who is dealing the cards at our birth, but yes, I think that we can throw some back which we need not play with this time, if we have learnt our required lesson of love from love, that is. Our hand is always really containing this one trump card, the ace of hearts. Everybody has this card dealt to them. The other cards you can change, by creating a vehicle within yourself for this change to take place within. Lay out your cards, and let God replace one of them for you, or add another card to your hand, but it would take a rather extraordinary person to actually do this, I feel.
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• Australia
28 Apr 16
@Shiva49 Thanks siva. It reminds me of a quote about somebody that was doing something that couldn't be done. They were too busy doing it to think about if it could be done, or not. It Couldn’t Be Done, by Edgar Albert Guest Somebody said that it couldn’t be done, But, he with a chuckle replied That "maybe it couldn’t," but he would be one Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried. So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin On his face, if he worried he hid it. He started to sing as he tackled the thing That couldn’t be done, and he did it. Somebody scoffed: "Oh, you’ll never do that; At least no one has done it"; But he took off his coat and he took off his hat, And the first thing we knew he’d begun it. With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin, Without any doubting or quiddit, He started to sing as he tackled the thing That couldn’t be done, and he did it. There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done, There are thousands to prophesy failure; There are thousands to point out to you one by one, The dangers that wait to assail you. But just buckle it in with a bit of a grin, Just take off your coat and go to it; Just start to sing as you tackle the thing That "couldn’t be done," and you’ll do it.
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
29 Apr 16
@innertalks Thanks Steve. It is the attitude that differentiates doers and naysayers. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"- a quote by the Chinese philosopher Laozi. Then the famous words of Neil Armstrong "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.". We have to start somewhere but some just are not up to it but then lament their fate. For me if it has to be done "just do it" come what may - otherwise we will miss the bus and then bemoan our "misfortune" that is more of our creation - siva
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (32461)
• Canada
28 Apr 16
There is a lot of wisdom in the Randy Pausch quote! While there are certain circumstances that we are stuck with, we are responsible with what we do with our lives. As the Bible says, 'We reap what we sow." If it is to be, it is up to me!
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
28 Apr 16
Thanks for your input. We are never denied choices in life and the higher one rises the harder is the fall! If we start disadvantaged we can climb the steps on our own accord than getting perched at the top to start with and the consequences that follow not knowing the way to rise again - siva
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (138164)
• United States
27 Apr 16
I agree very much with this.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (13966)
• Singapore
27 Apr 16
Thanks Sharon, we need not end up a loser or even a winner how we are placed initially. We should create own destiny - siva
1 person likes this