What is it like to be an introvert?

Raipur, India
May 6, 2016 11:50am CST
I have been both an introvert as well as extrovert in different phases of life.Growing up and as a child I have been an extreme introvert,not really by choice but by circumstances.Nobody seemed to like me or wanted to talk to me for some reason so I have pretty much spent my entire childhood alone.But then later on life took a toll and I started speaking on stage it made me feel confident about myself and I developed this new ability to strike off and initiate a conversation with almost anybody.And henceforth I became an extreme extrovert. Coming from my own experience I can say being an introvert makes your life tough.I have friends who happen to be introvert so I feel the constant need to make them feel included because I know how bad it might feel to think you are excluded or ignored or your presence is not felt/appreciated or outcasted.Also it becomes really hard to understand whats going on their mind.There might be chaos going on inside them but still they'll choose to keep mum about it.How am I supposed to help you as a friend if you do not tell me what's going on or what's bothering you? So I would like to put up this question to introverts- WHAT REALLY MAKES YOU AN INTROVERT?CHOICE OR CIRCUMSTANCE? WHAT PROBLEMS DO YOU FACE? WOULD YOU LIKE TO CHANGE IT AND BE AN EXTROVERT INSTEAD?
3 people like this
4 responses
@imravi (2337)
• India
6 May 16
I am an introvert and I think circumstances lead to this....the problems I face in daily life is that I don't think that everybody likes to listen to others or especially me.....yeah I would definitely like to change this fu**ing thing because I know I can do a lot in life if it happens...well I like not to share everything with my friends even with my best friends....(you don't know me so I can speak btw)...
• Raipur, India
7 May 16
I totally understand what you mean I have been there too! The way I have convinced myself is they are people too and they aren't perfect either. Just find the bunch of right people and you'll be fine.
1 person likes this
@imravi (2337)
• India
7 May 16
@Blue_bubble Yeah....search going on..
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
6 May 16
The most annoying thing you can do to an introvert is try to change them or condemn them for being them. All introverts have atleast one person who they aren't so introverted around. That is the person they share their problems with. We aren't worried about being excluded. We are thinking, "Ugh, Why did I come here? Man, I can't wait to get home and finish the third episode of___" Being introvert or extrovert isn't simply about circumstances. As Deborah K. mentioned, our brains are also wired differently. They even look somewhat different. Extroverts need more stimulus which is why they crave socialising and attention. Introverts like to be around others(preferably one most trusted person or very small group) for a short period, but the stimulus can become over whelming for us. The best thing is to just accept us for who we are. Introverts don't typically try to force extroverts to "be quiet" or "be less social", so why not give us the same respect?
• Raipur, India
7 May 16
Am not trying to change anyone. So sorry if you felt so. I'am just inviting views and opinion. I always keep an open mind towards things. I was just trying to know things a little better.
1 person likes this
@sulynsi (2671)
• Canada
6 May 16
I thought I was an extravert when I was younger. I was pretty comfortable dealing with people, worked in the service industries, was a pretty good communicator. However, when I read about the differences between an extravert and an introvert, I discovered that my personality is actually an intorvert who had, by training, forced herself to deal with social situations. I think one's basic personality is the ex or in but its your environment, training and experience that can confuse you into thinking you are one, when really you are the other. The thing for me that kind of was definitive was how I feel AFTER I've been with people. Drained. Exhausted. Classic introvert. I deal with it, but with a drain on my energy. Extraverts draw the energy from others and are energized by social situations. That is how I understand the difference.
• Raipur, India
7 May 16
Fresh perspective well put. I agree with you there are introverts who train to be around people. Every individual has a basic nature. Like I always felt excited being around people but didn't really got that chance earlier that made me an introvert.
@Genipher (5405)
• United States
6 May 16
What makes a person an introvert? I vote circumstance. I was extremely outgoing...until first grade. I was publicly "shamed" by another classmate and from that moment on determined it was safer to just keep quiet and stay out of the spotlight. I didn't crawl out of my shell until I met my husband. He's drawn me out quite a bit. And after I had kids? Pshaw. That shell was chucked across the ocean, never to be seen again. It used to be I would refuse to ask a grocery clerk where a particular item was. I would leave without it rather than risk sounding stupid by asking a question. Now I'll track down an employee and take 'em down like a bloodhound if I need something and can't find it.
• Raipur, India
7 May 16
And in restraunts too I would eat something I didn't like and not complain about it. We share the same stories in a way with just the difference that different things worked for us. For you it was your husband and for me it was public speaking. But one thing's for sure life has become a lot more easier.