Adopted

Quezon City, Philippines
May 8, 2016 2:23pm CST
I found out that I'm adopted when I was 30+ years old, when my mom told me at her sick bed. I remember then that I felt no hatred, or negative feeling when I found out hence, I was so thankful for my parents who have raised me and treated me as their own. Question: What do you think will be the right time to tell your child that she/he is adopted? Is it right to wait for a couple of decade , or should you not tell him or her, or maybe you start when your child is young...
8 people like this
8 responses
@Marcyaz (35592)
• United States
10 May 16
I would think it all depends on the child and parents, some parents who have adopted will be afraid the child will be wanting their birth parents instead if them and some just don't want to tell the child or adult that they are adopted.
2 people like this
@Marcyaz (35592)
• United States
13 May 16
@twentysix76 Tell me were you really shocked and did you wish she had told you when you were a child or not.
1 person likes this
• Quezon City, Philippines
13 May 16
@Marcyaz Well, shocked yes, but when they told me i got no regrets but I'm so thankful for what they did to me and accepted me as their own, now I'm re-living what they did to me , I have now a son, a son by heart.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35592)
• United States
13 May 16
@twentysix76 It is wonderful to know they gave you love and accepted you and you can now give your love to your son.
@Corbin5 (119302)
• United States
8 May 16
I think it best to tell a child when the child is old enough to understand the concept of adoption.
2 people like this
@topffer (36370)
• Djibouti, Djibouti
8 May 16
If I was adopting a child at birth, I do not think that I would tell him/her about the adoption : a plenary/complete adoption in my country puts an adopted child on the same rank than any natural child, and the birth certificate is modified to tell that he/she is your child, so why would I tell to this child that he/she was adopted ? At 30 years, you cannot adopt somebody without his/her consent. You can still recognize him/her as your child, but it is something else... and a bit late... but it happens times to times.
2 people like this
@sol_cee (18077)
• Bermuda
19 May 16
Soap operas have exaggerated the notion of adoption and made it a major plot for a usually complex story. Glad that you accepted it with open heart. Do you wanna know your biological parents?
1 person likes this
• Quezon City, Philippines
21 May 16
Agree, I have asked my Godmother, who was responsible for giving me to my adoptive parents, they just said that all they know is that my mother has the same family name like me, and they have given a particular city and that's it , I can't look for them cause the info are so generic. Anyways, I'm fine with that and satisfied by my adoptive parents have brought me up and I will forever be thankful.
@MGjhaud (20865)
• Philippines
9 May 16
if i am to adopt, i will tell the kid.
1 person likes this
@zarlamain (24874)
• United States
8 May 16
If and when I do get married, I would like to adopt a child. I will let him know that he or she is adopted after he or she turns 18 and is ready to go off to college because I'm concerned that he or she will rebel or get distracted on the premise of not being my real child.
1 person likes this
@cessy_08 (308)
• Dublin, Ireland
8 May 16
I am not adopted so my opinion is just based on what I feel. I think it is good to let the child know when he/she is old enough to understand. I would say it is better to let the child know about it when they are in their early teens or earlier. Sometimes, there are adopted kids who fail to see the good done to them and see the "confession" as an act of betrayal especially if they feel that it was done to keep them in the dark.
1 person likes this
@ida123 (6234)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
13 May 16
For me, I will tell my adopted child when she/he is still young, telling him/her that I adopt her and tell her the reason why I adopt her/him, tell her whereabouts and later on, I'll tell him also where her/his parents are but my treatment for him/her is just the same as my natural children.