Frustrated

United States
May 16, 2016 1:47pm CST
So.. I have a 6 year old son,love him to death. lately he has been acting up. He is a follower, If another kid is doing something in class, he follows behind them. I have talked and talked to him about being a leader and doing the right thing. He says he understands and will do better but still does the same thing. It is really starting to frustrate me. I have tried time outs and taking away games, and really talking one on one with him. Any suggestions on how I can get him to be a leader? How to get him to behave in school. I don't want my son growing up to be a thug or something much worse. Days like this really makes me question being a parent, or if I am even fit to be one. I am basically taking care of him by myself, and I try to make sure he has fun times and things like that. Just want him to do better, and grow up to be a great adult. any suggestions or comments would be greatly appreciate.
5 people like this
6 responses
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
16 May 16
It sounds like he needs a male role model in his life, do you have a male relative or friend that would be able to interact with him?
1 person likes this
• United States
16 May 16
That is what my mom said as well. He has my brother who is 25 but he doesn't live in Fayetteville. He has my dad as well. He also has my best friend, who is male. I wish his dad would do better, but I try to compensate for him not being there and I guess it is just not the same.
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
16 May 16
@angtobeheard Maybe your best friend could take him out and do some activities with him and also your dad. If your brother lives not to far maybe he could come and take him out sometimes just so he has some male bonding.
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
16 May 16
Just my viewpoint. You are the parent and will raise your child the way you want and it should be that way. I don't know unless a child is doing something really wrong let them discover? Yet acting right should be rewarded and acting up or wrong not rewarded at all. This boy a few doors down was very timid and the father wanted him to man up even at 5. I just thought so what. Maybe it would grow up to be a famous doctor or artist or something. Why try to make him into a construction worker at age 5. Getting along with others is important but this might be wrong to think this way but maybe it is the other kids that are not getting along? I don't know. Just talking about the day is good so you can understand his point of view. He will his way and know his mom loves him like I know you do. That's what is really the most important thing anyway eh?
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
17 May 16
@angtobeheard I always wonder what is behind children being disrespectful. You know?
• United States
17 May 16
@Bluedoll yea it may be the change in relationship with his dad. My mom thinks we need to go to counseling for him to figure out how to calm his anger. Its a work in progress.
• United States
16 May 16
I just dont want him to be disrespectful. that is my only issue.
@toniganzon (72285)
• Philippines
17 May 16
I have a 12 year old but when he was 6 i didn't see him being like that in school. He's still young and i think you're doing what you can. Just let him be I think. In time when he's old enough, he will be fine. Just be there for him all the time. The more we try to control our children, the more they would go to a different direction.
@flapiz (22402)
• United Kingdom
17 May 16
I'm not a parent but I'm not doing the right thing when I was younger I remember getting punished by my parents. Yes I was spanked when I was little and pretty much all my friends were. We grew up pretty well and we knew our limits. Although I don't think spanking is allowed in your country. It is very common in Asia and I don't encourage you to do the same. All I'm saying is a little tough love is needed. Works on me. I'm pretty respectful and responsible. But I'm not a parent so I don't know if I'm making sense.
• West Haven, Connecticut
17 May 16
I totally hear ya frustrations, I have twin daughter who are 5 going on 12 and have an answer for everything, I think with your son its him being influenced in school by other kids who act up since their parents arent strict enough, dont feel like your not doing enough. My best advice is talking to him 1 on 1 about what can happen if he continues to act up, scare a him a bit and keep reinforcing timeout and taking away his game consoles until he starts to get the point, repitition is key! Hope this helped
@nanette64 (20364)
• Fairfield, Texas
17 May 16
It sounds like you're at least trying @angtobeheard . Giving consequences is a good thing (time-outs etc). What is his 'favorite' thing to do? I hope it's not the games since you already tried that. If he has something else that he really, really likes to do; you could say, "Nope, not for a month." Maybe take him to the police station for a 'tour' of the facility. Get him involved maybe with the local YMCA or Boy Scouts.