Coming Out

@amadeo (58345)
United States
May 16, 2016 3:35pm CST
Coming out what the best thing that I did.No more closet and no hiding. I suffer many years in my early marriage.I played the straight role. Never was happy.Could not figured out what to do. In my years of playing straight this was the worse life for me. I hated this.Till 20 yrs later and met the man that I love.Got me on the right track.We do not choose to be gay.We are born this way. Now I am very happy and do not have to hide any more. But must say this.Parents should not be upset if your child told you that I am gay. Sit down with your child and talk it over.Dad are the one that get upset more than the mother.Dad always think that he was his son Macho.Sorry,day these things happen.But please do not throw them out and disown them.They are your kids. Too many suicide because of daddy would not accept this We have LGBT to help you and your child.Talk to them.Listen to them. Stand by them.There is a lot of help out there for you and your child. Do you have a child that is gay.Or are you trying to hide this.Do not I know that this sounds harsh.All they are asking .Give me a chance Photo is domaine
29 people like this
29 responses
@Corbin5 (95810)
• United States
16 May 16
Such wonderful advice you have shared with us here! Our son is not gay, but I do believe we would do our best to accept the fact if he were. Children are far too precious to be condemned for something they cannot control.
6 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@Corbin5 this is like what I want t hear.More parents should be like t his.
3 people like this
@gudheart (12763)
17 May 16
@amadeo Sounds like you went through a lot just to try and be who you are. I am glad things worked out in the end :D
3 people like this
@Lucky15 (33450)
• Philippines
16 May 16
Therr are still few.parents who are upset with that their child.is. and i am glad that many are more.acceptable. i have few gay men friends in college, they are the best.
4 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@Lucky15 thank you.
5 people like this
@Jdaw1985 (4003)
• Harrells, North Carolina
16 May 16
I am glad that you were able to come out of the closet and feel so much better now. I am also happy that you have found the love of your life that is some tmes hard t do. And you are right about being born that way i learned this in school but a lot of people do not think that way. They feel that you choose to be that way and you can change if you wanted to and you really can not.
2 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@jdaw1985 thank you and yes,we still have this going on.
@Jdaw1985 (4003)
• Harrells, North Carolina
16 May 16
@amadeo You are very welcome and what you mean you still have what going on?
• United States
17 May 16
I would never deny anyone the opportunity to be themselves. I support my children in their choices. One of my children is bisexual. She is single and looking although she doesn't say that. I know and hope that one day she will find the one to love her as she so deserves to be loved. My sister has been married twice, once to a man, her second to a woman whom she loves with all her heart. Acceptance is key. I love them no less. I'll defend their rights forever.
2 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
ElusiveButterfly I am so happy that you support them.They are your children and your family there.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (7042)
• United Kingdom
16 May 16
I'm glad you found happiness, but sorry for you and your wife that you had to go through that marriage that was obviously wrong. I think parents may be upset partly because they think that having a gay child will be the end of the line, end of the thought that they may have grandchildren to look forward to and to carry on the family. Of course straight children may not produce grandchildren either but I suppose in that case there is always hope! And nowadays gay children do produce grandchildren too!
2 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@Fleura yes,the can.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 May 16
I'm glad that you were finally able to live your life and be your true self.
2 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
Marilynda 1225 thank you
@teamfreak16 (39799)
• Colorado Springs, Colorado
16 May 16
Every gay friend or boss I've had has been openly so. I'm sure it was a relief for them. I saw a comment on here the other night about how LBGT choose the lifestyle. I set her straight, but never got a response.
2 people like this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@teamfreak16 That is good for them.Not have to hide this any more
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36945)
17 May 16
I think you are wonderful being so open about it, I admire you. My middle son (not the one I posted about the other day) is kinda mixed up with it all, his sexuality. He as way too much on with school and life out of school. He's just done Ten Tors and goes over to the US in a week to sing in a choir there (both my sons sing) He does go to the LGBT group each week. I'm sure that over time he will find is way, I hope. You are right sitting down and chatting and if he is gay or whatever I will still love him. We are all different in this world.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@kevin1877uk.Kevin is the LGBT helping him.I am so glad that you accept this.He is your son wether he is gay or not. I do hope that he will find his way.Thank you for sharing this.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36945)
17 May 16
@amadeo You are welcome, thank you for writing about this.
@LadyDuck (141184)
• Switzerland
17 May 16
You are so right, there is not shame in coming out. We do not chose to be heterosexual exactly as we do not chose to be gay. You are giving a great advice, because there is no reason to make a child unhappy only because we want to hide the truth.
1 person likes this
@miniam (9244)
• Bern, Switzerland
16 May 16
You did the right thing coming out, you are human being first and other things later, what you chose to do with your life should be your choice. I fiind that people who judge are too harsh and ignorant.It does not male you a different person gay or straight. Wish you all the best and hapiness,you have the right to be happy.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@minisam thank you much for understanding
1 person likes this
17 May 16
I appreciate you too much!! I can understand your feelings!! But you know what "it hurts deeply to listen that your son is gay" i think that is what you think but there is nothing like this!! Give your dad a chance guys I know it feels a bit unusual to be different!! To be unique!! But there is nothing more for a dad for seeing you happy!!
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@TheRioter thank you for the response
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (27811)
• Canada
17 May 16
What a great way to pass on what you've encountered. We have close friends who have a daughter who is gay, and she lives down in LasVegas. I asked her mother once why she lives so far away, and she told me that she wouldn't be accepted here for her lifestyle. And I told her that she is a bigger parent then I could be because I want mine closer to me, and she told me that all she wants is happiness for her child. And that is really what you are giving as advise. I would have imagined it harder when you came out then when my friend's daughter did which was in the last 5 years or so. After my friend explained it to me that way, it makes complete sense from a mother's point of view.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@Juliaacv That is a wonderful story there.Sorry to hear about the other.Thank you for sharing this
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (115612)
• Bunbury, Australia
17 May 16
This is very good advice. It is not a choice to be gay so it's no good ranting and raving about it. Our nephew is gay but he was always accepted for what he was - even by his grandmother who was born in 1910. In fact, he was one of her favourites.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@JudyEv Judy I am so happy for him and also that he is accepted.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 May 16
More people need to be as honest as you are it helps others to understand. When I moved into a condo in early 1990 the only other owner was a man named Bill - he was so cute, we became good friends. He was just a great person and would do anything for anyone. We still keep in touch. I credit him for explaining things to me years ago.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@AbbyHill and yes this helps a lot to have some one to explain
@Dragonairy1 (1415)
• Newcastle Upon Tyne, England
16 May 16
I'm pleased you're happy now. My brother is gay and I know he found it hard coming out especially to my dad who used to be in the army, but I'm pleased to say my dad accepted it and my brothers very happy too. But it's still a hard road for many sadly.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@Drangonfairy1 that is so nice to hear that.Loved this kind of story.Thank you
@EddieHands (37399)
• United States
17 May 16
Well congrats on coming out ! Blessings !
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@EddieHands thank you after forty five years of living together and married almost three years.
1 person likes this
@EddieHands (37399)
• United States
17 May 16
@amadeo Wow yes always reach for you dream... and do what makes you happy! Blessings
@polyxena (2579)
• Sturgis, Michigan
16 May 16
That's great. I'm proud of you. I'm not even sure I'm fully ready for my 'coming out' so to speak. Being asexual possibly a grey asexual (which people always have a big thing about not existing) so I don't want people to tell me that there might be something wrong with you. But it's great for you to come out, and be yourself.
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@polyxena thank you there.there is always help out there if you need it.
@polyxena (2579)
• Sturgis, Michigan
18 May 16
@amadeo I know :)
@Tampa_girl7 (24126)
• United States
16 May 16
I am glad that you are happy now.
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
16 May 16
@Tamp_girl7 no back out now after forty five years.lol
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (24126)
• United States
16 May 16
@amadeo just noticed that I can't send you a private message.
@GreatMartin (4311)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
22 May 16
As you know I have been out since 1948--heck even if it was a choice it was the best decision I ever made!! I work with kids who have been thrown out of their homes for being gay, hit the streets, hustle to get a sandwich or a shower or a floor to sleep on and they wind up getting HIV and/or AIDS--yes, 'cocktail' or not there is NO cure for AIDS and teenagers are dying of AIDS all because their OWN parents only loved them conditionally!
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
22 May 16
@GreatMartin.well said there in your comment.You are one Happy fellow there
@andriaperry (43349)
• United States
17 May 16
When I am perfect I will then judge people. I am glad that you are happy.
@amadeo (58345)
• United States
17 May 16
@andriaperry.I am very happy.You are perfect andria
1 person likes this