Regrets are always in the end

May 31, 2016 6:03am CST
I remember when I was a child, me and my only cousin in my mother side are not in good terms since we can remember. I am mad at her and consider her as my rival the same thing she feels towards me. We try to make it better. I reach out for her and she did the same. But unfortunately it didn't work out. I just realize it when I saw her in the hospital bed. She suffer from a kidney failure at the age of 21 or 22. I ask for her forgiveness though I know that its too late. She can't even say a word that time because she is in a comma already but I saw clearly a tears run down her eyes. I know from that moment that she already forgive me at the same time I forgive her. I really didn't know where that grudges starts. Maybe because of unfair treatment between us. Since I am older than her, I want to discipline her but they didn't allow me. Now that she's dead, regrets flows naturally from me. A lot of what ifs came rushing. I sometimes cry over her. Missing her though we really doesn't have that good and sweet memories. I cry over her favorite song, I cry if I remember her and I cry knowing that I cannot be with her ever. I dreamed of her, she tapped me on my back and when I look at her she was smiling so sweet at me with a glow all over her body. I tried to call her but she turn her back at me. But when I follow her she stop and hug me tightly then break it walk away. Right this very moment while typing this, I cried. I just missed her so much. Wherever she is, I know deep inside she is happy and contented. (Image from:
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3 people like this
3 responses
@sunrisefan (17786)
• Philippines
31 May 16
It's time to move on. She has forgiven you and you have to forgive yourself so that you will have that peace.
1 person likes this
1 Jun 16
I already moved on but there times that I just missed her
1 person likes this
@sunrisefan (17786)
• Philippines
1 Jun 16
@ahann_coy It's okay to miss her but you must stop feeling guilty.
1 Jun 16
@sunrisefan I don't it's just that there are a lot of what ifs when it comes to her and of course I just missed her.
1 person likes this
@ida123 (6267)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
31 May 16
You miss her, right? But she's gone and what you should do now is to move on and try to forget those sad memories, you've forgiven her and I know, she forgives you also.
1 person likes this
1 Jun 16
Yeah I miss her and I already moved on. Its just that there are times that she crossed on my mind and I can't help but feel those.
1 person likes this
@ida123 (6267)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
1 Jun 16
@ahann_coy That is natural but time will come, you forget those bad memories.
1 Jun 16
@ida123 Yeah time will come. As what they say, time heals all wounds.
@Lucky15 (33386)
• Philippines
31 May 16
You miss her. I can feel.that.
1 Jun 16
yeah I do miss her. but I know she's happy wherever she is now.
1 person likes this