From My 2002 Notebook of Interesting Stories
By Alice Henry
December 12, 2016 11:03pm CST
I don’t know who to give credit to for this story, but I think it was Dr. Adkins. It’s called “A Short History of Sustenance theology or how we got this way.” And then broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables and fruits of all kinds, were created by God, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. And the Devil created fast food restaurants and brought forth the 99 cent double cheeseburger. And the Devil said to Man: “Do you want fries with that?” And Man said: “Supersize them.” And God created healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure that man found so fair. And the Devil brought forth chocolate candy and woman gained weight. And God said: “Try my crispy fresh salad.” And the Devil brought forth ice cream and woman gained more weight. And God said: “I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them.” And the Devil brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And MAN gained more weight and his bad cholesterol went through the roof. And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds. And the Devil brought forth cable TV with remote control, so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained more pounds. And God brought for the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And the Devil peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he introduced sour cream too. And man clutched his remote control with one hand and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol with his other hand. And the Devil said: “It is good.” And Man went into cardiac arrest and God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. And the Devil created HMOs.” Of course, everything can’t be blamed on the Devil, but I’m sure you get the gist of the problem here. Humans make their own choices when it comes to their diet. And many of us make really bad choices.