While there may be two sides, this still proves a point.

Centralia, Missouri
March 3, 2017 7:53am CST
So years ago I was having a house warming party. I invited oh, 60 odd people, those friends with both me, me and the x, and the x. People even confirmed, and not a single person showed up. Only one let me know why (had an emergency that required dental surgery). The rest just, never said a word. You can tell how important you are, or how much your friends value you, your time, and the work you put into something by how they treat you, or act in situations like this. The only one of any decency was the one that let me know. Fast forward to the last couple months, I had been planning a little get together for about 25 people this Saturday. Well I just cancelled it yesterday, because the last two people said they couldn't come. At least this time people had the decency to tell me. But. They knew about this since Christmas. You cannot expect me to believe that all 25 of them had a valid excuse. One was, no money. Well you weren't paying for a dime here, so that's bupkiss, no money was needed. One was couldn't get out of work, except I know for a fact you go to concerts and get out of work all of the time for everything under the sun, I have you on Facebook. So while it may be true you couldn't get out of work THIS time, you could have made arrangements last month like you do for everything ELSE you go to, and made it to this. I am not going through everyone's excuses. No point. I got over my anxiety over the last failed attempt, and here is life's reward, proof I should have never bothered. Again. Yes, I am being negative, but really, what else should I take from this? I have no friends? Even the new friends that I thought I had made don't value me or my time either (at least they were polite enough to let me know, so they aren't complete losers like the people from example A were). I am well aware there may be a few valid reasons in this, but.... It has been a long long time since I had friends I could trust. I thought I had regained that, and I have a really hard time thinking that all 25 dumping out at once doesn't mean something.
12 people like this
13 responses
@Platespinner (18584)
• Winston Salem, North Carolina
3 Mar
Made me think of this old song. You aren't alone, even God has 'friends' who make excuses.
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3 people like this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
hhm, interesting song
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
hmm, interesting song
1 person likes this
• Winston Salem, North Carolina
3 Mar
@Jessicalynnt The lyrics are based on Luke 14:20.
• United States
3 Mar
Life Lesson: You are a lucky person if you have one true to the end friend. The rest are all acquaintances. I have one such friend for the last 60 years. Although we live 850 miles apart she would be here as soon as possible if I needed her and the reverse is the same. PS - maybe stick with going to parties instead of trying to have them
3 people like this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
Yeah, I would love to have one like that. and I agree with you there, not worth the time and effort.
1 person likes this
@Corbin5 (82107)
• United States
3 Mar
Such a disappointment when those you think are friends fail to behave as such. I am not sure why all 25 could not attend, but it seems far too many people these days have no idea what it means to be a friend.
2 people like this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
right? And it's not just that. If any of these, I had thought were friends, had returned the favor of seeking me out at other times, like I have them, I wouldn't be as upset. But I look back and realize..... I went to them, always, they haven't once tried to come to me....so.... I guess I was mistaken.
1 person likes this
@Corbin5 (82107)
• United States
3 Mar
@Jessicalynnt So disappointing, but it seems that now you know that these people will have to prove themselves to have your friendship. It may not be right, but for me, I would not run to help if they asked me for help. Sometime we give and give and others do not reciprocate and we have to keep our distance for a while.
2 people like this
• Centralia, Missouri
6 Mar
@Corbin5 pretty much, I figure if I am free and not busy whatever, if it inconveniences me, maybe not, because they aren't showing that they care so...
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (122436)
• Switzerland
3 Mar
I know that my husband is not very social and he does not like to go to parties, even he appreciate the friends inviting us. That said, I cannot believe that all your 25 "friends" (?) are all non social people who prefer to stay at home. Do not be negative, but try to find the reason why they let you down.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
It's not just that, it's the fact that in the 6 months I have lived up here (reconnected with some, met and made what I thought was new friends with others), I realized, Im always going their way, they haven't once met me even half way..... I think perhaps I was just looking so hard I was willing to overlook people who are fun to hang with, but don't know how to be friends
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (122436)
• Switzerland
4 Mar
@Jessicalynnt I think that those people will never be capable to be "friends", they go with the flow.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
6 Mar
@LadyDuck I think you are right
1 person likes this
@CoralLevang (40931)
• United States
3 Mar
I have had several disappointments (too numerous to care to mention or relive), but I wrote "Out of Sight..." a month ago. I DO get it. And understand about trusting people or not....It's really a dilemma that I haven't figured out how to maneuver yet in life.
I have noticed that people rarely reach out to or pay attention to others around them, including those they include as their friends and loved ones. It is not...
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
going to read it now.
1 person likes this
@CoralLevang (40931)
• United States
3 Mar
@Jessicalynnt Hope you enjoyed it.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (21681)
• United States
5 Mar
I can remember my mama having a party years ago and not a soul showing up or even calling. that is very bad behavior
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
6 Mar
J said she had that almost happen, had tons of food for a ton of people and like 2 showed up. I just don't get people anymore, I KNOW people go to other peoples for things.
@LoriAMoore (10162)
• United States
3 Mar
I guess no more party planning for you.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
unfort we have the wedding and reception coming up, I am.... wondering if there is any point.
@fishtiger58 (30715)
• Momence, Illinois
3 Mar
I'm sorry this happened to you, it's quite sad. I hope you don't entirely give up on the human race and their nastiness.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
I haven't given up on J. Just the rest of the world has me sad atm
1 person likes this
@JolietJake (41582)
3 Mar
I only 'socialize' when forced to by circumstance these days. I'm just not really a 'people' person...just ask all the hapless people in bands I have run sound for...my 'tact' is broke and when they do something stupid, I loudly ask "Why are you doing something stupid?" I like you fine, but I would probably have turned down an invitation...not because of you, but because I turn down invitations these days. But that's just who I am. I don't know who those people you invited are.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
lol, you don't need to socialize, just man the music!
1 person likes this
@Trensue (5265)
• United States
3 Mar
I don't think you are being negative - I think you being a realist. I believe that I can only control my behavior and reactions and have become somewhat isolated because of that. I respond and follow through on commitments I make and sadly I assume no one will do the same. (Like I am the one who shows up at a dinner where you asked to bring something with 5 things because I assume no one else will). Many of my friends now live very far away - I don't see them often but communicate almost daily.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
I know sometimes life happens, it's just... when you never make an effort, and the one thing I reach out to you finally on, and you bail.... yeah.
@snowy22315 (34427)
• United States
3 Mar
I guess my thinking would be you need a better set of "friends."
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
3 Mar
Apparently so, I just don't make them easily, and really don't even know where to go about starting over, again.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (101131)
• Bunbury, Australia
4 Mar
I'm sorry this has happened. I guess really they are just not worth bothering about - not in terms of having a party anyway.
@Susan2015 (18755)
• United States
4 Mar
It's not fun when that happens. But I only keep a small amount of friends, the rest I would consider acquaintances.