My 4 year anniversary
By Faye
@FayeHazel (40248)
United States
March 24, 2017 11:32am CST
March 25th 2013 - is the day that I was proposed to. (I know, I'm a day early) This year, 2017 it will have been 4 years.
Of course - I am not married and the engagement and relationship ended 6 months after that. He really became a different person after I said yes. It was amazing. So I am not sad that it didn't work out. What I'm sad about is that he wasn't who I thought it was before I said yes.
My "freedom" date is October 3, the day the relationship ended. Some friends have suggested I celebrate that day. No, that's alright, I don't feel upset about that one, but the March one, I do.
So I still celebrate it - I buy myself a gift, and take myself out to eat somewhere nice. Do you think it's odd?
I look at it like - I haven't had a date since my Ex-Fiance. Of course I have no actual anniversary to celebrate with anyone. But that doesn't mean that I have to sit on the couch and feel bad, staring at the walls.
So I celebrate my "anniversary" even if it is only it's me doing stuff for me. And, well, if I don't do it, who's going to? No-one apparently.
Don't get me wrong - for the most part I'm happy single, there are many advantages to being single, and there are many to being in a relationship, so it is give and take.
Article on ending a relationship, her situation was different than mine, but she makes some interesting points:
In 2012, it looked like I had everything. I was very fortunate — young, healthy and dating a man who would do anything for me. After an elaborate surprise proposal (involving horses and a giant
17 people like this
16 responses
@DianneN (246720)
• United States
26 Mar 17
@FayeHazel It must be extra difficult in a small town, be you should get out and about. A companion would be good for your soul. 
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks ! At least I sort of try... sometimes, :-)
1 person likes this
@infatuatedbby (95001)
• United States
24 Mar 17
Very interesting you celebrate this anniversary even though you are not together anymore but as long as you're happy that's all that matters.
Happy Friday and have a lovely weekend!
2 people like this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks! I hope you've had a nice weekend too.
1 person likes this
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
25 Mar 17
I understand how you feel .. I'm sure the day you were proposed to was a happy day for you and because of that , you should celebrate it .. You celebrate the happiness and what it made you feel ...And be thankful that it was that engagement that brought the worst in him .. So you are free and happy being single ..
1 person likes this
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
28 Mar 17
@FayeHazel Yes! you should be very grateful that you didn't go through marriage .. because getting a divorce is worst ..
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks Bess - I am so happy I found out before the wedding. It was a blessing in disguise for sure.
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@Tampa_girl7 (48929)
• United States
24 Mar 17
I am sorry that he wasn't the right man for you. I hope that you meet the right person one day
2 people like this
@thelme55 (76476)
• Germany
27 Mar 17
@FayeHazel yes, it could have been worse. You have made the right decision anyway.
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks! Now that you mention - it could have been so much worse if I would have realized this at a later date, like after marriage. For the most part I'm happy single, but dates like 3/25 (yesterday) make it a little tough.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (85471)
• United States
24 Mar 17
I started your discussion and was thinking, wait, she's married? I'm glad you ended it before you were tied to his changing self for life. I'm mostly content with being single, but I've gotten to the point where I'd really like to be in a relationship. Which seems so weird because for years it barely crossed my mind to be involved with someone. Maybe it's that I just 36, who knows?
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
This doubles as my "April Fools" post I guess lol. :-) Thanks. In the end I am very happy that it didn't work out. I'm like you, pretty happy with being single. Occasionally I miss being in a relationship, but by and far I'm pretty independent so I don't mind. Good luck to both of us that we may get what we seek :-)
1 person likes this
@louievill (28851)
• Philippines
24 Mar 17
So you are celebrating that you found out he was a beast after all? Sorry but did I get it right? LOL
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Lol, I had to laugh at that beast bit. But yeah! You've got it right. I celebrate that I didn't end up getting married. I see now that would have been a disaster.
1 person likes this
@louievill (28851)
• Philippines
26 Mar 17
@FayeHazel I also toast to all the girsls who did not make it to my life and they are probably doing the same thing 
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that is what we call destiny. Willie Nelson, Julio Iglesias - To All The Girls …:
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@1creekgirl (40515)
• United States
24 Mar 17
Enjoy your day. I'm glad you discovered the real him before you married him. No one can pretend forever, but I know a really good guy is out there looking for you.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40515)
• United States
27 Mar 17
@FayeHazel I bet God's got someone very special for you.
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks Vicki! :-) (Your name is spelled like my mom's and my middle name ) :-) It could have been so much worse, I could have found out after the wedding. Thank you, I haven't much faith in finding someone anymore, so I will use yours :-)
1 person likes this
@JamesHxstatic (29242)
• Eugene, Oregon
24 Mar 17
You are no doubt well out of that relationship. It is odd that he changed so much after you said yes. I can't imagine concealing the real me in that situation. Enjoy this special day!
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks! Yes, so true. I have wondered why he changed so drastically... what was he thinking? If you aren't up front with the person - if you aren't yourself, it won't work out. Though something I realized later is - (He was from Austria) - he was more interested in a green card. Actually admitted it. :/ Thanks! I had a nice day :-)
@JudyEv (325734)
• Rockingham, Australia
27 Mar 17
@FayeHazel How about that? Hope you're not blaming Australia for his outlook! We have a really good friend in Austria so I wouldn't want them being held accountable either!
We have a really good friend in Austria so I wouldn't want them being held accountable either! @FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
It's amazing. I wonder what he thought he was doing by hiding his true self.... (anyone else who feels the need to hide the real them - too) no one was going to be happy if we would have been married. Small world! He was originally from Austria - but grew up in Australia.
1 person likes this
@chrissbergstrom (10767)
• Banks, Oregon
24 Mar 17
Love is so hard, i have exes i still think about and i kick myself everytime i do, it would be awful for me to remember a date like this i thankfully did not keep track after breaking up.
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
I'm sorry to hear you haven't had an easy time, either. I don't know why finding someone needs to be so difficult. Treat yourself to something you like, I find that helps. Here's to better luck for both of us. :-)
1 person likes this
@teamfreak16 (43421)
• Denver, Colorado
24 Mar 17
Happy unanniversary, I guess it would be.
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Un-iversary - it should be a "thing"! :-)
1 person likes this
@pammooratan (4668)
• India
24 Mar 17
Everyone has their own attitude to live life.
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@Happy2BeMe (99399)
• Canada
24 Mar 17
I am sorry he wasn't the man that you agreed to marry. Some people change. It is better that you found that our before the wedding. It is great that you have a day where you spoil yourself and that day is as good as any.
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
26 Mar 17
Thanks Laurel. :-) Actually you bring up a good point. What I actually said, when he asked me - (and I was completely surprised too) was "yes, always." Of course during the span of time while we were breaking up he reminded me that I worded it that way. "You said yes, always.". However I said yes to someone who I thought was completely different personality wise..... that makes me feel better.
1 person likes this
