How to deal with my mum?
May 2, 2017 2:31pm CST
I have fallen in love with some people in my life and not getting over it although it has been decades. Mum don't knows about it and she keeps pressuring me to get marry as I am 36 this year. In my heart, I still ponders about the them every day. How can I get over them and carry on with the new one my mom recommend to me? I just want to be having a simple life with the rest of the decades coming but she doesn't apply to it. As I also have depression and schizophrenia, I don't want to make my life complicated. Another thing which makes me angry and disappointed is she keeps remind me that after her decease the house we are living will be hand to my younger brother as he is the son. But he is unfilial and never gives allowance to my parents although he is a lawyer and married. I am here to everything they ask me to do even now getting marry and finding a job. I think they are not fair to me but I also think never mind. But everytime my mum brings up the subject about this, I am getting fed up and angry. As for my dad, he never scolds me from young until now. But he also now supports my mum on what she says and do, and I am not happy. I just know they wanted to get rid of me and having a happiness with my brother who just married this year. I am feeling neglected and sad and also under pressure as my mum keeps on pressuring me to get work. I told her I want to work at home but she says " You don't play on the computer and ask me to let you do that" . I said I am earning money as I am not able to do fulltime job outside but she keeps saying I am lazy and not motivated. She doesn't understand me at all. Right now, I keep praying to God everyday will get better and hopefully I can live a happy life in future although without companion, because I still have some good friends.
4 people like this
• United States
4 May 17
I truly understand your situation with your mental health conditions. I too suffer from some as well. My mom is very understanding of it and would not pressure me to marry. Your mom and dad need more knowledge of your condition. it's hard to find a mate that will love and care for you with that. Not that it's impossible. But hard for sure. Keep working online and start showing them the things your money can buy. They will see you are earning. Your brother should take you in if nothing else.
3 people like this
• Boise, Idaho
4 May 17
Not very understanding are they? I'd leave and find a place for yourself else where. You won't have much of a happy one there with them will you? Else where you can do as you please. Sad but this is how it is sometimes.
• Delhi, India
4 May 17
We have our full sympathies with you and your conditions. However, it seems that you are thinking from your own point of view and not from the point of view of your parents. Every parent want that their children should get married at an appropriate time and age, the same applies to your parents. You have to take a call whether you want to get married or not. If you do not want to get married, you need to become self dependent so as to survive in this world.
Hi there! I'm so sorry to hear that you are having this dilemma. Due to generation gap, parents may not understand their children anymore. They don't know that earning can be done from home. It's really difficult to educate them without them feeling insulted and disrespected. I hope that you will be able to sort this out on your own.