What's easy to take even when it's not given?
By Boingboing
@boiboing (13153)
Northampton, England
May 15, 2017 4:05pm CST
Nope, this isn't intended as a riddle, but I wanted to follow up on my previous post about being miffed that (a very small number of) people have a bit of a habit of hijacking discussions by responding to every single comment as if it were their discussion and not yours.
In the process I seem to have made a lot of really wonderful people think I was talking about them - when I wasn't. I'm very sorry if they thought I was having a dig at them.
Which brings me to the answer to my question - it's very easy for people to take offence even when the person writing had no intention to GIVE offence. Or perhaps more accurately, not to those particular people. I suspect the ones that do this 'thing' won't actually 'get' why it's so annoying to some of us.
In a wider context - to make the post less about this silly myLot world - people these days are taking offence all over the place about all kinds of stuff where offence wasn't intended or even imagined by the original writer. Worst of all - and there are loads of them - are the people who take offence 'on behalf' of other people.
I had a friend in my student days who was really good at pulling people up on any politically incorrect comments. If somebody was joking about one-legged Peruvian nose-flute players with ginger hair he would immediately chip in:
"I find that offensive. My aunt / mother / sister / best friend is a one-legged Peruvian nose-flute player with ginger hair''.
I'm not actually sure any more what point I was trying to make. I guess it was just an excuse to tell you about my friend's non-existent aunt / mother / sister etc.
8 people like this
6 responses
with ginger hair''.so you are doubly safe from me taking offence.
@JudyEv (325759)
• Rockingham, Australia
16 May 17
I have this 'hijacking going on' and it gets quite annoying although I try to ignore it. Some posts have 40 comments and the same person adds their comments on every one of those 40. And yes, some people take offence very easily.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (325759)
• Rockingham, Australia
17 May 17
@LoriAMoore People indeed! I have a guy and a lady doing this. So far, they haven't both done it on the one post. That would be a bit too much to handle!
@Poppylicious (11133)
•
16 May 17
I take offense easily. But that's just because I'm a paranoid numpty. :)
1 person likes this
@shivamani10 (11038)
• Hyderabad, India
15 May 17
yes. This is really annoying to face such a situation. The people pick up quarrel where this is not to supposed to be and even for such quarrels are very less. Totally amazing. The psychology of the society is changing I think. What according to you is the main reason for such urgly seen?
1 person likes this
@boiboing (13153)
• Northampton, England
15 May 17
That's a REALLY good question. I'm not sure but I have a few ideas. I think people are accustomed to more 'drama' in their lives these days, thanks to the whole Facebook way of life. They love to post about how offended they are by things they probably haven't even read and they seldom bother to check if things are real and true before they start sharing them.
I also think that many people feel so constrained by what they think they are NOT allowed to say that they jump to offense when somebody else steps over the line. To give you an example, I took a fantastic holiday in Iran about 10 years ago. After nearly two weeks with my hair covered, we went to a famous site and a local girl threw off her headscarf and climbed on an ancient monument. After even that short time in the country, I was 'horrified' that she was showing her hair and disrespecting the monument - now how ridiculous was that when I come from a place where everybody shows their hair (and a lot more) and this was an ancient but not religious site.
Sorry for the long answer but it's a great question.
1 person likes this
@Fleura (29129)
• United Kingdom
16 May 17
@boiboing That's quite funny, it just goes to show how quickly one can adopt new cultural mores. But it's surprising how much things have changed without us really realising, until you find something from a while ago. I was sorting through my Mum's collection of wrapping paper and in there I found some of those free gift labels that often get sent out by charities, these had obviously been there 30 or 40 years and were from the Spastics Society (now known as Scope). They had mottoes something like 'Help the poor spastics' and seeing them now was actually a bit shocking!
But on the original subject - I wasn't offended, just a bit worried : )
