I'm a Functional Depressant

@noni1959 (2509)
United States
May 20, 2017 1:14pm CST
@sharon6345 talked about depression in one of her posts and it hit home for me. Only recently have my kids noticed I'm battling a strong depression. I love music and dancing but have no desire now. I stay home more other than work and I cry more when I used to rarely cry. I have no desire to do things I used to love. Mine is life changes with moving due to illness, battling my job to allow me to continue to work remote so I don't have to retire (I put my package in) and I know when I retire I'll feel, "what now?" I have severe medical issues that takes away things I used to be able to do. We have horses but I can no longer ride. I can't sit on the floor so laying on the beach without help hurts. It's hard to tent camp which I love. Many things that mean a lot to me I can't do. Telling someone to get out more, see a therapist, take medicine or someone is worse, does not help the person. Just say, "I'm sorry, I'm here." Nothing else. Don't offer solutions the depressed person can not see. I don't sit and moan about it. People have no idea I am. I laugh, I talk of happy things in person but like the commercial, I wear a mask.
11 people like this
7 responses
@Courtlynn (42274)
• United States
20 May
Oh my god, yes! The last two paragraphs are exactly how i feel! Saying for people go get out of the house, go for a walk, get a job, learn a new hobby.. it does not help them! And even the hapoiest looking person can be fighting battles we know nothing about. Which is why i try to be kind to everyone. I am sorry for what you are going through. And what you can not do anymore that you love. Its terrible. But i am here if you need to talk.
2 people like this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
21 May
Thank you so much. Just hearing you are there makes a difference. I was just told a couple days ago to get a new hobby. I don't want a new hobby. I want to enjoy what I used to but making the effort is not easy.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (42274)
• United States
21 May
@noni1959 you're welcome. I get it. People are like that to me all the time about not having a job and such
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
22 May
@Courtlynn Lately I ask how my life is affecting theirs. They can't give me a good answer.
1 person likes this
@RasmaSandra (11225)
• Riga, Latvia
20 May
Well I won't offer you suggestions you don't want because I can feel for you but not really understand what you are going through. I am glad to be able to function fairly well at my age but when my sciatica hurts and my knees ache I feel like I am on my last legs. There are times I will wake up in the morning and just cry for no reason at all and it stays with me until I can shake it. Anyway do take a look at this if in any way it can help. Virtual hugs to you.
Can you eat your way to a better state of mind? Changing your diet might help with depression.
2 people like this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
21 May
@RasmaSandra I don't mind this at all. Thank you for the link. It's the advise of "cheer up" or "others have it worse" I don't want to hear. I heard diet can help with some depressions. I am a depressed eater too so this with cognitive therapy may be what can be a turning point.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (19295)
• Moses Lake, Washington
20 May
Keep writing. Its good for the soul. I can't do many things I used to do. I get sick of little tasks like washing dishes but you know, if I sit and do nothing, I feel worse so up I go- sometimes.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
21 May
I do piddle and keep moving. It can be an effort but I make myself go. Today I browsed the vegetable plants at Lowe's and came home with whisky barrels and tomato, tomatillas, peppers and other things to begin my vegetables. I used to love growing so maybe it will help.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (19295)
• Moses Lake, Washington
21 May
@noni1959 Oh my yes. You for sure are on the right track, buying barrels and plants. Purposeful living. Watching things grow is so good for the spirit.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
22 May
@sallypup I got out today and planted some vegetables and digging in the rich soil was so nice. Later I sat outside and read while listening to the birds and creek below. It did wonders for my soul.
1 person likes this
• Lakewood, Colorado
20 May
Yes it surely is a battle that is so personal as well Lori, someone butting in and bossing is really not of help.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
21 May
It doesn't. Just someone saying they are there helps. Sometimes a depressed person feels so all alone.
1 person likes this
• Lakewood, Colorado
21 May
@noni1959 Yes so alone I know Loretta, lucky we have myLot too.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
22 May
@TiarasOceanView I am very happy to be here and talk with all of you. I'm trying to come in daily again even if it's just ten minutes at a time on work days.
1 person likes this
• Otis Orchards, Washington
21 May
Sorry you are feeling this way.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
22 May
Thank you. I have ups and downs with it and trying to make it better.
1 person likes this
• Otis Orchards, Washington
22 May
@noni1959 I hope you are successful.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
23 May
@RichardMeister Thank you.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (112999)
• Boise, Idaho
21 May
Sorry to hear of your issues. I have severe depression with panic attacks. Depression is always a part of my life just in different degrees. I have learned to be pleasant when out around others. Unless people have the same malady they really may not understand. One reason I don't get into relationships or socialize much. I don't feel a need to justify myself to anyone. It is what it is and I deal with it the best I can.
1 person likes this
@noni1959 (2509)
• United States
22 May
I'm like this. When I'm around others I joke, smile and seem fine. I miss having friends near but with this going on I'm glad they are a long distance and I don't let them know much about it.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (112999)
• Boise, Idaho
22 May
@noni1959 ....Yeah, you can pick and choose what you let out to them.
1 person likes this
24 May
i'm sorry. I do understand what you are experiencing. I hope that you have someone you can talk to.