Expression of My Depression about Weddings

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I don't envy the happy couple ... per se ... I mean, I 'envy' them in the good way you're supposed to---wishing that you could be 'settled down' as happily as they will be soon. But it's depressing for me, as ... well, I'm glad to go to weddings (and birthday-parties & funerals & graduations etc.); but most people enjoy those because either they can hope for one like it in the future or they can remember how they felt at their own. But I'm not sure how to enjoy someone's wedding--- I mean, I know 'be happy for them'---maybe do it in the spirit of 'saying goodbye to two old friends and saying hello to a new couple.' But I'm at kind of a 'too late for me'-age. (I hope I'm not 'cursing myself to die alone' by saying that ) Maybe some old girlfriend and I can find each other by chance sent to the same retirement-center and have some happy golden-years (and I realize 35 is a bit too young to be talking about 'being old' ). But 'growing old together' with someone seems "outside any possibility"