~She's Not Doing Well~

Jacksonville, Florida
July 18, 2017 11:34am CST
My grandmother on my dad's side has always been a strong and independent woman, she amazed me with her strength in every way. She did everything herself, power walked for miles every day, took care of a mentally retarded daughter on her own once my grandfather passed away, and she never had an ache or pain...until she hit 90 years old. Slowly within a year's time she went down hill really fast. My parents went to NY this past week to say their goodbye's because she is not doing well at all. She can't walk anymore, she has dementia, she's weak and sick looking, she's in a lot of pain, and she's miserable since she can no longer do things for herself. =( It was so sad as my father told me how she was because it sounds like a completely different person. It breaks my heart. When she passes away her daughter (my aunt) is going to have the hardest time with it. She's in her 50's age wise but still a small child mentally-she's not going to handle this well at all.
35 people like this
36 responses
@DianneN (84978)
• United States
18 Jul 17
I'm very, very sorry to hear this sad news. I hope provisions have been made for your aunt's care.
5 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@DianneN Yes she's in a home for people with special needs. She will be taken care of physically, emotionally I am worried about her.
3 people like this
@DianneN (84978)
• United States
18 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies That could be a problem depending on her cognitive skills. I hope not.
3 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@DianneN My dad thinks she's not going to live much longer after their mom goes. =(
@marguicha (101762)
• Chile
18 Jul 17
Has she always been with her? Doesn´t she work?
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@marguicha My grandmother stayed home with the 8 children while her husband worked. My aunt lives in a special needs home now and will be fine physically but emotionally is what I am worried about.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (101762)
• Chile
18 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies It is difficult to deal with loss. And it is not true that we can move on quickly.
1 person likes this
@silvermist (20116)
• India
18 Jul 17
That really is sad.And your aunt is aware of the situation?
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@silvermist She's aware of it but she doesn't really understand since she is a child mentally. She broke down in tears when she saw her mom in the nursing home looking so bad. =(
1 person likes this
@silvermist (20116)
• India
24 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies Quite heart-rending for all of you who are present too.
@jstory07 (69746)
• Roseburg, Oregon
18 Jul 17
Will her daughter be able to make it on her own.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@jstory07 Well she is in a special needs home so she will be fine physically. I am just worried about her emotionally.
@Happy2BeMe (74936)
• Canada
18 Jul 17
So sorry to hear this.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@Happy2beme Thank you.
1 person likes this
@quantum2020 (9878)
• Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico
18 Jul 17
It is great to reach that age, but not been able to do most activities is not. My mother is 75 years old and she is stil active, but I don´t imagine how she is going to be in 10 or more years form now. I wish your grandmother the best on these years
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@quantum2020 Yeah, it's hard seeing how she was to how she is now. =( Its heart breaking for everyone.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Jul 17
Sorry to hear this. Things will work out with your aunt.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@Abbygreenhill Yeah she will be taken care of physically, I'm just worried about her emotional well being. =(
@NJChicaa (46018)
• United States
18 Jul 17
How sad. Who is caring for your aunt now?
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@NJChicaa It is really sad. She's in a special home-kind of like a nursing home but for special needs instead. She's lived there for a little while now, thank God she will at least have a home still.
1 person likes this
• Peoria, Arizona
18 Jul 17
That is really a shame, it is never easy to lose anyone, but at least everyone is prepared for it to happen when it does. Also, at least she lived life to the fullest, she sounds like a very strong woman to look up to. i hope your aunt has people around her to help her through this hard time and when the inevitable does occur.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@DesirousDreamer Yeah, we all know it's coming but it's my aunt I am most worried about. My dad has 7 siblings but I think she will take it the worst. =(
@HazySue (22960)
• United States
18 Jul 17
I am so sorry to hear about this. Has any provision been made for the care of your aunt?
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@HazySue Thank you. She has lived in a special needs home for a bit now and that is where she will stay.
1 person likes this
@Courtlynn (55025)
• United States
18 Jul 17
I'm sorry to hear this Never easy losing someone, even if we know it's going to happen.
2 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@Courtlynn Thank you. Yeah, it is heart breaking.
1 person likes this
@manandezo (664)
• Petropolis, Brazil
19 Jul 17
I am so sorry to hear that, @LovingMyBabies! I wish all goes well and this is just life. I know it gives us so many bad aspects when face our final road, but nothing ends there and there will be a new beginning for everyone. This is great to think and forces grow in ourselves when this inspiration comes. Be strong, try and help your aunt in your possibilities and all will be fine. Wishing you well from here!
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@manandezo Thank you. I know it's life, it's not a good part though. I do know she knows the Lord and I am glad for that. I mostly worry about my aunt with this.
1 person likes this
• Petropolis, Brazil
19 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies I can understand your worries about your aunt. Try and give your hand in your possibilities. Help will come and family will try and help now.
@moffittjc (45184)
• Gainesville, Florida
19 Jul 17
I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother's condition. It's so unfortunate that we live such long and happy and fruitful lives, and then fall apart at the end. Although I want to live to be a 100, I want to do so with all my strength and wit about me. But unfortunately there are some things that are outside of our control, and it's just a fact of life. There's no way to sugar-coat it....getting old sucks. I just got back from visiting family in south Florida last weekend, and while there celebrated my grandpa's 92 birthday. Physically, he's still doing well, but mentally he is suffering from dementia and it's really difficult to see him that way. When it's your grandmother's time to go, I hope she does so peacefully and with a smile on her face. I also hope that at that last hour that she has a clear enough mind to be able to recognize all her loved ones around her.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@moffittjc Thank you. It is sad how that happens but I'm glad she lived a good life. I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather as well. =( I would not want to witness that first hand, it would be so heart breaking. I hope so too. I know she will be with my grandpa again and she will be in Heaven so that's comforting to know.Thank you. =)
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 17
Where will your aunt go once she passes? Is she in a home where she receives care? I alway worry about things like that. Dementia is horrible and takes a toll on the one afflicted with it and those around them as well. I have watched so many people decline rapidly with it. Saying a prayer for you and your family.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@ElusiveButterfly My aunt already lives in a special needs home so she will be okay physically, I am just worried about her emotional health once my grandma passes away. It is horrible, I wish it didn't exist. =( Thank you for praying.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies one of my former clients now lives in a nursing home. She was unable to care for herself. Her sister cared for her for a couple of years after their mother passed away. She is now nearly 70 and still mourns the loss of her mother. Makes me sad to see her so sad. She was born with special needs too. Her mind is sharp, but that of a child.
@celticeagle (119803)
• Boise, Idaho
19 Jul 17
How sad. Her daughter have any family there? I hope so.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@celticeagle Yes my aunt has her siblings and they visit her at the special needs home sometimes. It's not enough though I don't think. =(
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (119803)
• Boise, Idaho
19 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies .....Maybe you and your children can make her a card and send it to her from time to time.
@TheSojourner (17304)
• United States
18 Jul 17
I pray for as peaceful a transition as possible. It is never easy for anyone as our families change.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@CoralLevang Thank you. Yeah, it makes it harder I think for someone who is special needs though.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies I certainly understand this. I hope that your EFM (exceptional family member) has been taught and is able to do as much for self as possible, and has more family and friends that can step in to assist, where necessary.
@KristenH (24901)
• Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio
18 Jul 17
Sorry to hear this Jen. Your family's in my prayers.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Jul 17
@Kristenh Thank you. =)
1 person likes this
@KristenH (24901)
• Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio
18 Jul 17
@LovingMyBabies You're welcome.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (134347)
• Bunbury, Australia
19 Jul 17
I'm really sorry to hear about your grandmother. And yes, it will be very difficult for her daughter when her mother goes.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@JudyEv Thank you. I know, I'm worried about her emotional well being once my grandma goes.
1 person likes this
@Freelanzer (9499)
• Canada
19 Jul 17
So sorry to hear this. Your grandmother sounds like an amazing woman and she has lived a good life. No matter how long they are with us it is always hard to let go especially when you know she is having a difficult time.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@Freelanzer Thank you. She is amazing and yes she has lived a long life. =) Yeah I hate knowing she's in pain and nothing like herself anymore.
1 person likes this
@LeaPea2417 (21928)
• Toccoa, Georgia
19 Jul 17
I am very sorry to read this.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
19 Jul 17
@Leapea2417 Thank you.
1 person likes this