I'm Sleeping on the Couch

United States
August 31, 2017 4:54am CST
This is ridiculous. My boyfriend knows I can't have the cat in our room because the cat won't stay off my legs. I just had a vein ablation and I can't have the cat laying on my leg. So tonight when we're getting ready for bed, he just let the cat in and wouldn't put him back out. He made me feel guilty for wanting to go to bed because the cat wants to sleep in there. So I guess it makes sense to kick out the person who just had surgery and make me sleep on the couch?? I am beyond angry. We have already been having issues lately with him putting his video game before me, and now the cat comes before me and gets to sleep on my side of the bed while I'm forced to sleep on an uncomfortable couch. I'm already uncomfortable as it is from the procedure I just had done, not to mention that was the fourth surgical procedure I've had done in the last year. ... The cat just came out of the room to lay next to me on the couch. So I guess I can have my side of the bed back, but I am still pissed at the boyfriend. I won't soon forgive or forget this. Don't get me wrong, I love my cat, but people come before pets.
9 people like this
10 responses
@toniganzon (49185)
• Philippines
31 Aug
I love my cats, but I do understand you. If it were me, I would be mad at him and it would be a cause for a fight.
3 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
I am still ticked off over it. I adore my cat but he is going to have to deal with sleeping on the couch for a few weeks. It's not like I'm throwing him outside into the cold or anything. He is spoiled rotten and he can deal with not being able to sleep in our bed. Our cat hogs the bed, particularly my side of the bed, and I can't have him flopping all over my legs or pushing me off the bed right now. If my boyfriend wants to sleep with the cat so bad, maybe he can join him on the couch!
3 people like this
@toniganzon (49185)
• Philippines
1 Sep
@Srbageldog Have you told him that already?
3 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
@toniganzon No, but if it comes up again at bedtime I most certainly will.
3 people like this
@Courtlynn (64336)
• United States
31 Aug
Wow. Why would he do that. I'm so sorry.
2 people like this
• United States
31 Aug
He left the bedroom door open when he left for work this morning too, and then didn't lock the front door so I had to get up and lock it and then chase the cat away from the bedroom. It's almost like he's trying to start another fight. I guess the one on Saturday wasn't enough for him.
3 people like this
@Courtlynn (64336)
• United States
1 Sep
@Srbageldog yikes.. youd think he'd be there for you and making things easier and everything not all that
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
@Courtlynn Now things have calmed down and he's back to his normal self...I don't know what that was all about. I'm still ticked off over it.
2 people like this
@Blondie2222 (21399)
• United States
31 Aug
I'm sorry you are dealing with this with your boyfriend. I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it but hopefully you can talk in the morning when you wake up about your needs etc. I hope you were able to atleast get some sleep.
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
I was able to sleep in the bed once the cat came out of the room. I would have removed him from the room myself but I'm restricted from lifting anything that is more than 10 pounds, and our cat is FAT. I tried luring him out of the room but he was not budging, and neither was my boyfriend. That better not happen again tonight!
1 person likes this
@Blondie2222 (21399)
• United States
1 Sep
@Srbageldog Well I pray that didn't happen again and you were able to just sleep in your bed. I hope the healing process goes quickly for you.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Sep
@Blondie2222 Thank you. Last night our cat removed himself from our bedroom without any issues. Hopefully tonight he won't try to get in. It's a shame cats can't understand what we tell them!
@dodo19 (32569)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
31 Aug
You have every right to be upset. I would be as well. He should be more understanding.
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
I'm glad to know I wasn't overreacting. I think most women would be mad over this!
2 people like this
@dodo19 (32569)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
1 Sep
@Srbageldog No, I don't think you were overreacting at all. A lot of the women I know, including myself, would have felt the same way in this situation.
2 people like this
@thelme55 (14337)
• Germany
1 Sep
@dodo19 I would feel the same.
2 people like this
@gullver (544)
• Egypt
31 Aug
Is he for real?!, I don't know exactly what are your traditions in your country, but you should speak with him, try to talk to his parents or someone else.
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
No reason to bring his parents into it, but I can't believe he did that either.
2 people like this
@gullver (544)
• Egypt
1 Sep
@Srbageldog Honestly, what he did is very very strange
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
@gullver He is a strange person sometimes.
2 people like this
• United States
16 Sep
Staci, have you tried asking why he feels the need to have the cat sleep on the bed him, but not you? It does seem strange that he places the cat's comfort above your needs and comfort. Maybe you can explain to him why it's uncomfortable for you, and if he doesn't understand this, keep talking with him until he does. To me, it sounds as if there is some resentment building up between both of you. Also, you may want to tell him that you won't feel guilty because you are a person who's needs are not being met. Good luck to you, and I hope everything works out.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep
I think he felt guilty the next night because he ended up sleeping on the couch when he couldn't get in our room without the cat running in and jumping on me. Our cat is like our "baby," and is spoiled rotten, so I just think he feels bad suddenly banning him from the room. We were both tired the one night when I went to sleep on the couch and he probably just didn't want to deal with chasing the cat out of the room. Luckily for the cat, the ban has been lifted. And everything is fine now.
@spiderdust (5993)
• San Jose, California
31 Aug
I don't blame you for being angry! I understand the video game frustration as well. Next time he tries to make you feel guilty, state firmly "I. Am. Recovering. From. SURGERY."
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
I definitely will do that. He better not try to pull that again.
1 person likes this
@AngelesF (297)
• Spain
31 Aug
Don't feel guilty about your cat! We have 1 cat now, and I know what I'm talking about. And let me tell you you are in your right to sleep without the cat!
2 people like this
• United States
1 Sep
Our cat is spoiled rotten. It's not like we're just throwing him outside either. He's still spoiled, he just can't come in our room for now and sleep on our bed like he's used to. For once he's being treated like a cat!
1 person likes this
@sissy15 (5392)
• United States
3 Sep
That sucks, and I agree people should come before pets but it seems anymore they rarely do. At one time people could never picture people being second class citizens in their own home due to their family loving the pet more than them. The idea of a pet being treated as a person was a very foreign concept back in the day, now pets come before some peoples children. I love animals and I respect them but if it's a pet or my child or a pet or my husband my child and husband come first.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Sep
I agree. I love my cat (more than most people, actually) but...people still come first. And it is insulting when your grandparent removes all of your family photos from his home to hang up framed pictures of his second wife's yappy little dogs. My grandpa had no pictures of his own children or grandchildren, but plenty of pictures of those damn dogs. And he hadn't even had those dogs very long at all -- he replaced all of our pictures as soon as his second wife moved in with him. What's even more bizarre is this is a man who used to shoot his family's pets to get rid of them back in the day. I mean I've heard some stories that made me cringe about how he treated his kids pets when they were growing up (he buried my aunt's cat alive when it was dying -- who does that??) but back then an animal was an animal and he was putting it out of its misery. Now an animal is not just an animal, it's part of the family. People even get outraged if people leave their dogs tied up outside while they're away at work, but what are you supposed to do with a dog when you're not home? Not like they can be left in the house alone for 8 hours if they're going to crap or pee all over the place. I don't know when it was that pets started becoming equal to human family members, but I find it bizarre and I love and pamper my cat -- well, he's my baby. But if I had a human baby there would be a difference. (I think I rambled off topic...just thinking about people treating pets like they are equal to human family members.)
@thelme55 (14337)
• Germany
31 Aug
Oh no!. That´s not kind of him to let you sleep on the couch while a cat is there with him. I would have put them out of the bed if I were you. You just had a surgery and it should be you on that bed. Sorry about that.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Sep
Thank you. I don't know what that was about last night but he better not try to pull it again tonight!
1 person likes this