A Nice Visit With My Family
By StacyB
@Srbageldog (7716)
United States
October 1, 2017 2:26am CST
Earlier this evening my youngest brother picked me up and we went over to my parents' house for a visit. I hadn't seen him in a while so we had some catching up to do. He wanted to know what was going on with my health, so I filled him in on everything. He was shocked to learn that I have brain damage from an old brain injury and said it sucks because there's nothing I can do about it now other than live with it. Which is true.
Anyway it was nice visiting with everyone. My parents and sister were there, of course, and then me, my brother, and his girlfriend. We shared old memories and laughed a lot. My dad brought up politics at one point and everyone remained civil while talking about it, even though I know some of us have differing views. If my other brother (the felon) had been around, the conversation would not have remained civil and a fight probably would have broken out. So I'm glad he wasn't around. Plus no one enjoys his company anyway.
We stayed for a few hours and then my brother and his girlfriend drove me home, and we chatted a bit more in his car outside my apartment. We talked about some of the less pleasant experiences from our upbringing. He also experienced abuse as a kid but he caught the tail end of it, since it was worse on us older kids. He commented that he knows our parents will not be around forever so he wants to try to get together more often and spend time with family.
All in all it was a nice visit. Things did get uncomfortable for me as we were leaving when my dad insisted on giving me a hug. I am not comfortable hugging him and never have been. He was my biggest abuser. He is not as bad now as he was then, but I flip-flop on even being okay with having him in my life. I played along and gave him a hug, though, because if I had refused it would have started crap, and I wasn't looking to cause a scene.
Anyway that was my Saturday evening. How was yours?
7 people like this
7 responses
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Oct 17
I am saddened to hear of the abuse you suffered. I to suffered abuse, but at the hands of my mother's boyfriend. They were together for about 5 years, but is seemed a lot longer. My brother's suffered the worse of his attacks.
Nice that you and your brother got to spend some time together. Glad to hear that he is realizing the importance of spending time with family before it is too late.
My Saturday evening was a bit boring. Fought off fatigue and the need to go to bed early. Sleep won though. LOL.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Oct 17
@Srbageldog well hopefully you will see him more often now. If he doesn't call you to set up a visit, you call him. Insist on seeing him.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
@ElusiveButterfly I told him that next time we need to include our other brother (there are three boys and two of us girls.) I don't see him too often, either. I love spending time with my siblings, except my one brother, the felon.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
I'm sorry you and your brothers were also abused. My sister and I got the brunt of my dad's attacks and when we got older we started fighting him to prevent him from hurting our mom and our brothers. Eventually when he realized he couldn't beat us anymore, he stopped, but he is still verbally and psychologically abusive.
I wish I could see my brother more often. I hardly see him now that he's an adult and living on his own.
A boring Saturday evening is always better than one filled with drama. 
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99399)
• Canada
1 Oct 17
Glad that the visit went good for the most part. Sorry to hear about the abuse you went through. I had a pretty old Saturday.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
Thank you. I am glad my youngest brothers didn't experience as much abuse as us older kids did -- that means we did our job to protect them from it.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99399)
• Canada
1 Oct 17
@Srbageldog yes it is good that you did. No child should have to go through that. I was blessed to have two wonderful parents.
1 person likes this
@cahaya1983 (11121)
• Malaysia
1 Oct 17
Sorry to hear that you went through that awful experience. But I'm glad to know that your Saturday went well. It sure is nice to break out of the usual routine sometimes.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118368)
• Gainesville, Florida
1 Oct 17
Stacy, I am sorry to hear about the abuse you and your siblings suffered as children. It really angers me that people think it's okay to hurt children. The older I get, the more prevalent I realize abuse is in our society. I pray that all this is changing for the better, and parents understand that it is never okay to abuse their children. In decades past, people kept silent about what went on in the homes behind closed doors. However, nowadays that silence is being broken and people are openly talking about it, which may be a good sign. For the sake of future generations of children, we need to put a stop to abuse!
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
2 Oct 17
Thank you. I agree with everything you said. It's taken me a long time to forgive my parents...and I don't think I've fully forgiven them yet. Maybe I never will. My siblings and I all suffer mental health issues thanks to them. My mom has at least acknowledged she was a bad mom and apologized for it. She has her own mental health issues, she was being abused by my dad, we were poor and she had no way out and I don't think she knew how to cope. I didn't realize until I was an adult that my dad has some mental retardation, plus he has his own mental health problems that he's never been treated for. It's not an excuse by any means, but at least it allows me to understand why they were the way they were.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
Thanks. I like spending time with my mom and most of my siblings, my dad and one brother I'd rather not spend too much time around.
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
I'm sorry. I know I am lucky to have my parents still.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
1 Oct 17
It sounds like for thr most part the visit went well. That's good. :) I have only hugged my father one time in my life, it was when my grandfather was dying in the hospital so I get that it was uncomfortable for you.
I babysat and it went well so I'm grateful. =)
1 person likes this
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
1 Oct 17
I'm glad someone understands. I have only hugged my dad a handful of times in my life, and most of those were when I was little. I can only think of two times (counting tonight) I have hugged him as an adult. My sister and I used to hide under our covers when he would come in and try to hug us before bed. We did not like being hugged by him.
I am glad your babysitting job is going well.
