Sucker for punishment

Canada
October 18, 2017 7:15am CST
I've struggled with many things in my life and continue to do so. Weather it being an addiction to a substance or being in a toxic relationship I seem to continue down the same path time and time again. I know it's not right or good for me or healthy in any way shape or form but knowing this and having bounced back many times from certain situations why do I keep taking the same road? Am I as they say, a sucker for punishment? Is there something in me that enjoys this abuse? Self inflicted, not self inflicted. Is this the person I will always be and always attract or be attracted to? Having seen the highs and the lows why do I always seem to end up right where I started?
4 people like this
7 responses
@nangayo (2291)
• Nairobi, Kenya
18 Oct 17
Welcome. try to love yourself and do the right always. Tell yourself you can do it and it will be possible
2 people like this
@Hannihar (129074)
• Israel
18 Oct 17
Maybe you grew up in an unhealthy environment and was not told how good your are and was not encouraged in your life. I have also seen many highs and lows in my life too. I am trying to be a better person these days. I do not always succeed. I moved away from the bad environment and make my own decisions whether they are good or bad.
2 people like this
@AmbiePam (84632)
• United States
19 Oct 17
Your self-esteem is so low, and if you don't value yourself I am afraid you will always be vulnerable to the bad. You are worth more than all of your past, and if you start to realize that your choices may change in a far more positive way.
1 person likes this
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
19 Oct 17
Wish I had the answers for you, however I don't. I think we all have our problems, some worse then others. I have never been addicted to anything so I cant even say how that happens or what it is like. I have never been in an abusive relationship, so I guess I haven't had it as bad as some. However I think each of us has to reach into ourselves and really search for what we really want in life and fight for it. Keep trying to see what new you can find out about you to move forward into a better life that you want.
1 person likes this
@ManieP (82)
18 Oct 17
Start with Loving yourself more and other things will follow.
1 person likes this
@Shortail (845)
• Philippines
18 Oct 17
maybe there's something in your road. try to analyze again, go back from where you start, there's might be unfinished business in your situation, that's why you keep running in circle.
2 people like this
19 Oct 17
Have you tried living away from your old friends or to start a new life away from those who know that yoi are like that so you will be motivated to start a new life.