I wanted to write but no one seems to be interested

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I wanted to write about depression and suicide. Unfortunately, I don't have a professional experience on writing, so the companies I've applied for rejected my applications. Every time I check on my social media account, news about people committing suicide are always there. AND most of them are teenagers. Yes, I am suicide attempt survivor myself. But why do I want to write about this? Honestly, I am experiencing Major Depression for almost a year now. A lot of times, I daydream of hanging myself; which sounds really creepy for normal people, but for me, it's like a daily routine. You cry even though you don't think of the people or things that depresses you. You cry while taking a bath, while eating, while listening to music, even when you're taking a poop (seriously, I experienced that). I am battling Depression on my own, and the only weapon I have with me is hope. Normal people may never understand that sometimes you don't feel any physical pain, because the pain affects you emotionally. I will never forget, I was 18 then, I was taken to a hospital. My parents wanted a private room, but since there's no vacant, I had to share a big room with 4 other patients. I'll never forget how I watched my mom cried in front of me and told me to look at the other three patients in the room with me. There was this guy who was the same age as me, he has leukemia. There was a girl, who I think was also the same age as me, who was hit by a vehicle and the doctor considered amputating both her legs. The third patient was a child, I think he was only 7 that time, and he has diabetes. My mom said to me, "look at them. They are here because they wanted to live. You're healthy but you are here because you wanted to die. Can't you see how blessed you are?" For 5 days, I wasn't allowed to eat nor drink. My doctors would visit me and inject me with medicine that really hurts my arms. I wasn't able to move my arms for an hour each time they inject me. I was discharged after 5 days and was scheduled for counselling. I proceeded with my first appointment, but never came back for another. When a person is depressed, they keep it to themselves. They are afraid to open up because they are afraid of the negative things that people would say or think. People might say, "you're such a drama king/queen", "you're talking non sense", etc. Depressed people need someone who is willing to listen to all the "non sense". Listening to them isn't a waste of time. Regretting you weren't there to listen when they were still alive is. Most of the time, I think of myself as a weak person because I get depressed too easily. But come to think of it, I realized I am strong. Even though I wake up every morning thinking that I am alive again and I'll be depressed again and I'll be crying again, I have to live because I don't want to miss out the day where every thing will be okay. When you start losing hope, you start losing the battle... Ever heard of the song "Leave Out All The Rest" by Linkin Park? (RIP Chester) There is this line and it said, "What am I leaving when I'm done here?" If you commit suicide, you will only leave the people who love you to feel pain, regret, disappointment, grudge, etc. And those feelings they will never forget. They might even blame themselves for the rest of their lives. And they might end up being depressed, too. It's like a chain reaction, so if you are considering suicide, then think again. I know it's difficult but never lose hope. Hope is the fuel that keeps me going. It should be the fuel that keeps you going, too. Hope that one day, everything will be fine, and believe that it will happen. It will happen. Why am I writing this? Because I want to help. I want people who are depressed like me to know that you are a strong person. You are reading this because you are stronger than you think. You are reading this because you are alive for a reason: you are a fighter. You are a fighter and depression is a battle you should never lose to. If you don't have anyone to talk to about your depression, I am very willing to listen. Never lose hope and win the battle.