Stay at home Mom

United States
October 29, 2017 12:39pm CST
I have been a stay at home Mom for almost 8 years to two wonderful kids. Don't get me wrong I love parts of it, but I also find myself feeling very unfulfilled personally. I had worked from age thirteen to when my estranged husband joined the Marine Corps. I have tried direct sales, money making apps, anything to feel like I'm not a freeloader, and I'm not saying sahms are bums, it's just a personal issue for ME, so what do you do to help not feel so...useless?
13 people like this
15 responses
@1creekgirl (9573)
• United States
29 Oct
I understand, but your job of preparing your children for life and teaching them to love and care for others is the most imortant job you could ever have.Trust me, they'll be grown before you know it, then you'll have time for a second career.
5 people like this
• Philippines
30 Oct
agree on that!
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (38245)
• Gainesville, Florida
29 Oct
My wife was like that when we had our two kids. She was a stay at home mom, and it started driving her crazy, because like you, she felt helpless. To help herself out, she did get a part-time job at night after I got home from work, and then she also found some women's groups that she joined that gave her a chance to get out of the house a couple of nights a week.
3 people like this
@ebanreb (5978)
• Philippines
29 Oct
I think you are not useless because you are taking good care of your children. I think today's generation complete attention of the parents is very important.
3 people like this
@Daelii (3446)
• United States
29 Oct
Honestly, at first I felt guilty when I didn't return to work after baby#2. It wasn't my choice. My Dr said I needed more time to heal (delivery wasn't the best to put it nicely) but my work would not give me more time. So they fired me. So I went a little stir crazy at first. Once I got use to it I realized that I'm doing better for my kids being home. When all are in school I plan to work again. At least I'd like to. Until then I just keep busy raising my kids to be happy, independent, good contributors to society.
2 people like this
@skydream (1131)
• Agate, Colorado
29 Oct
I understand how you feel to a point. I'm not a stay at home mom but for a couple years now I haven't been able to work due to personal things so while my fiance is out working I'm always doing stuff online to try to get money and cleaning the house cooking etc and a lot of the time i do feel like being a freeloader just me not other people who go through the same thing. I try to keep the house and everything clean and when i get money help out with things and surprise him with gifts but I think it depends on everyone personally what they do. I also started doing crisis repsonding online to not feel like I'm just sitting at home while he's out earning.
2 people like this
@dodo19 (29359)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
29 Oct
I do understand how you feel. I have three kids, ranging from 6 (almost), 4 1/2, and 2 1/2. For the most part, I have been a stay-at-home mom. As much as I have enjoyed a lot of it, there is still something missing. We still need to find something for ourselves.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (131477)
• Switzerland
5 Nov
You should not at all feel useless. What you are doing is as important as going outside to work. Your kids will grow better with their mom taking care of them. You can always find a part time job if this makes you feel better.
1 person likes this
@allen0187 (29079)
• Philippines
30 Oct
I guess keeping oneself busy would help. Ultimately, you have to tell yourself that even though you are a SAHM, you are productive and you contribute to your home and to the community as well.
1 person likes this
@paigea (21392)
• Canada
29 Oct
There is plenty of time to work when kids are in school. I work full time; my kids are grown. I also do mysteryshopping for a little extra. It us a flexible way to work part time on your own schedule
1 person likes this
@Corbin5 (89197)
• United States
29 Oct
When our son was little, I tutored in the evenings, so that helped. When he was in school, I substitute taught until he was in junior high and then went on to teach full-time.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Oct
I am a stay at home mom to 5 children. I also Home School my children and babysit from home for a little bit of extra income. It's not a lot but it sure does help! Plus I Mylot to make a little money each month and I do use an app to make a small amount as well. I love what I do, which is a lot when all added up and I don't feel useless at all.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Nov
Well not being married anymore and no children left to raise, it is just mom and I and as income has seriously been unavailable on my part, I do what I can to earn some . . . writing, drawing, selling, connecting etc as 'the more irons in the fire, the higher stoked your warmth is' . . . meaning the more ways residual income comes in, the greater ease of budgeting happens
@nangayo (2333)
• Nairobi, Kenya
30 Oct
Just taking care of your kids for eight years is already a big fulfillment. you should be proud of yourself for that. Some parents out there are so busy with their careers that thy do not have time for their children. their children do not know them because they have not had time for them. They think the nannies are their parents the parents are never home.
@Susan2015 (19685)
• United States
29 Oct
You could always volunteer a few hours a week somewhere. I think being a mom is a very important job.
@Emmlex1000 (1408)
• Lagos, Nigeria
29 Oct
You not useless just have patience better days are coming