JJ and the Case of the Baffling Bathroom Belt (A JolietJake™ Mystery)

@JolietJake (51149)
United States
December 18, 2017 10:42am CST
*tosses trench coat in corner* *sits at desk* *opens bottle of Scotch* *pours a shot* *knocks it back* *lights a cigarette* *deep inhale* *noisy exhale* I gotta tell ya...I've met a lotta dames in my time, but this one...the factory must have been workin' overtime, 'cause she was built. But I'm gettin' ahead of myself...it didn't start with the dame. So I was answerin' this call of nature, and I stepped into the bathroom for some privacy because I don't like talkin' in public...too many ears and too many mouths. And it didn't look like anyone was in there, but I walked all the way to the stall at the end, entered it, and shut the door. And there it was. This black imitation leather belt, made in China, laying over a bar on the wall. Quickly I whipped out my gun and lifted the toilet seat, but there was no one there. Baffling. Why would what looked to be a brand new belt...sans price tags...be doing in the bathroom? So I finished my call (nature didn't really have much to say) and watched the belt for another minute or two looking for a clue. Didn't find one. So I took the belt and went to the service desk (and this is where the dame comes in...she can service me any day). Let me tell ya...she was a looker. So that's what I did. Just stood there and looked for a minute. After I picked my tongue up off the floor and pushed my eyes back in my head, she asked if she could help me. Well, I thought of a dozen ways off hand she could help me, but with all these sexual harassment suits these days I decided to just tell her the story. Now, this was a brand new belt...you could tell it had never been worn. And I told her I had no clue what it was doing where it was doing, but it probably hadn't oughtta be doin' it there. And she agreed. If I'd a known she'd have agreed that easy, I woulda said somethin' else I was thinkin'. So I never did find out what was goin' on. Hey, I'm just a detective...I never said I was a good one.
14 people like this
8 responses
@NJChicaa (40026)
• United States
18 Dec
I want that minute of my life back.
4 people like this
@JolietJake (51149)
• United States
18 Dec
5 people like this
@FourWalls (13680)
• United States
18 Dec
@JolietJake — should’ve played some Steely Dan so NJ would have enjoyed it more.
5 people like this
@NJChicaa (40026)
• United States
18 Dec
@FourWalls oh that definitely would have improved it!
3 people like this
• Jacksonville, Florida
18 Dec
Might be a good thing you kept your thoughts to yourself...
3 people like this
@JolietJake (51149)
• United States
18 Dec
I wonder if I should have tried to spank her with the belt...some chicks dig that
3 people like this
@FourWalls (13680)
• United States
19 Dec
@JolietJake -- no, chicks dig the long ball.
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2 people like this
@FourWalls (13680)
• United States
18 Dec
Why did Humphrey Bogart’s voice read this in my mind? That belt is obviously the stuff that dreams are made of.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (123138)
• Bunbury, Australia
19 Dec
Very strange. I'm glad you managed to stay out of trouble.
2 people like this
• United States
19 Dec
hey man..share the scotch lol
2 people like this
@rebelann (41129)
• El Paso, Texas
18 Dec
Gee, that belt musta been somethin to git ya to pull out a pistol ...... you did get her phone #, right?
2 people like this
@BarBaraPrz (19797)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
18 Dec
You may not be a good detective, but you sure are a good story teller.
2 people like this
@kobesbuddy (46140)
• East Tawas, Michigan
18 Dec
Speaking my mind got me in trouble, more than once! One time with my first mother-in-law, the second time, after a very frightening car accident. Nobody got hurt, but the cop had to pull me off a choke-hold, around a man's throat, when he lied about what happened! I won't tell you what I said to him, it's against the My Lot rules! Did you get her phone number?
1 person likes this