Two Feet Too Far
By Uncle Joe
Virginia Beach, Virginia
January 17, 2018 9:10am CST
It’s not likely that I’m the only MyLotter who suffers this problem. And, if you don’t now, it’s quite possible for it to come upon you in the future,… if you live long enough. The problem is vision. Oh, I see well enough, normally. Before my cataract surgery the year before last, I had always been near-sighted. So, to read, or do any close work, I could see better if I removed my glasses. After switching to contact lenses years ago I found it necessary to wear reading glasses to see up close. Eventually, cataracts took over. Once the damaged eye tissue was extracted a permanent lens was implanted. My vision is now perfect for distance but I still need those Big Lot reading glasses, and they are at the center of this problem. The 3 pair I own have 3 different magnifications. The strength depends on the task. Enter: Second part of the problem. Between my age, and all the injuries accumulated on the way to it, I am not as limber as I used to be. I’m just not flexible enough to handle what was once a very simple undertaking. That is trimming my toenails. One of the problems with any of the 3 pair of glasses is judging distance. It may look to my eyes that my clippers are right on target when they are actually half an inch away. It’s a matter of getting my foot in a range where vision is the clearest. The only way I can see my tootsies with absolute clarity is without glasses and standing up. Then I am seeing them at nearly 6 feet away. Experimenting with unconventional methods turned out to be more risky than anticipated. It only took a tiny bit of trial and error to learn that a chainsaw is out of the question. I’ll never try that again. Not only is this problem a threat to my personal hygiene, it is also a matter of economics. If I can’t do the job without drawing blood, then I need to hire somebody who can. That is why I need your opinion on how I invest money. Which is cheaper, $40 a month for a pedicure, or should I spend it on a lot of new socks?
14 people like this
My husband hit that point years ago, so you're not alone. I do his nails. And its not a big deal, because as a mother, I did our son's nails when he was young, and as a health care worker in my younger days, I did the nails of our elderly residents. So, its all good. Ask your wife, she should be willing to help you out.
• Virginia Beach, Virginia
I would love to @Juliaacv but she's never here. Becky's been staying with her 92 year old mother since she took a bad fall a couple of months ago. She is also a beautician and always keeps my hair trimmed but lately I have had to outrun the dogcatcher.
• Fairfield, Texas
@UncleJoe Yeah, I caught that after I had already responded to you. The only other thing I can think of would be instead of the clippers to use an Emery Board. I know it would take longer to do the do, but at least you could feel how close you're getting to the tips of the toes with the left hand while the right is doing the filing. Maybe?