Closure that hurts..

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Have you felt them? I have had differences with a little girl whose family troubled me. But before that I loved her. Not because she was beautiful, or she sang well, but because she was she. And in some way, I was guilty of using her and taking advantage of her innocence, being the older of the two. This little girl grew up and stopped keeping in touch with me. Have you ever been condemned for a sin you did not commit? My little sister did that to me. I could only hurt. On facebook I told her what I went through because of her folks. She did not come into contact. Then she lost her older son. I was torn for quite a while whether to send condolences to her or not. My choices were...I send, she ignores. I send she reports, I send she replies harshly, I send she accepts politely. I had nothing against her - only against her folks. I sent it, thanks to some positive advise from DJ. And she replied with love. This was so unexpected - desired but unexpected. But then, the basis of that communication still hurts. You see, I played with that kid. Held him for a while in my arms. There is no future in this relationship I know, even though she used to sing ABBA - we will find a way to face new tomorrow...I am too grown up to believe in that. But I wish the closure was not so cruel. The second song of Mandy Harvey not only portrays what I felt for her, but she also resembles her facially in that song. You can fast forward to 8.07 in it to know how she looks. For some reason that kid is on my mind and can't stop crying.