Why do some people find it difficult to say no?

@mydanods (6782)
Nigeria
March 5, 2018 5:35am CST
Some people find it difficult to say no. They might be invited to engage in something they know is bad for them either morally or spiritually but they do not know how to say no. Eventually they regret saying yes later. Some on the other hand when invited to parties, events, gatherings etc do no say no but end up cancelling it at the last minute. Which in itself is not good. Is it fear that causes this? Are there other factors? On the other hand I say no all the time if something doesn't fit my agenda so it doesn't apply to me.
9 people like this
12 responses
@LadyDuck (147310)
• Switzerland
5 Mar
I tend to put myself in the shoes of those who are asking and I feel bad saying NO.
4 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
I understand that. But do you say yes all the time?
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (147310)
• Switzerland
5 Mar
@mydanods I say yes every time I can. There are times you are obliged to say no.
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@LadyDuck Do you say yes even though it might be inconvenient for you?
2 people like this
@dodoazo (17310)
• Philippines
5 Mar
They've the reason for that. Some of those may include the following: they're on position to express it right away, they're apprehensive that they hurt someone, they're too lazy to say it for their silence signifies it already.
3 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
Okay. But I wouldn't want to be saying yes when my head tells me to say no.
3 people like this
@dodoazo (17310)
• Philippines
5 Mar
@mydanods In reality, there are three answers for a question answerable by yes or no. Do you know that? The other one is maybe.
3 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@dodoazo Maybe means you are not yet decided. That is a no if you think of it in retrospect.
3 people like this
@Kandae11 (35069)
5 Mar
Some of us tend to think more of others than ourselves - we may be afraid to hurt someone's feelings even though agreeing to something might turn out to be the worst for us.
3 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
If you don't want to hurt someone's feelings and you end up hurting yourself, how wise are you then? Is that not foolishness? Just my thinking.
2 people like this
@Kandae11 (35069)
5 Mar
@mydanods Those persons who do that probably hope for the best - that all will be well and that their instincts might have been incorrect.
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@Kandae11 You might be right but I wouldn't rest my hope on pure chance.
2 people like this
@toniganzon (48524)
• Philippines
5 Mar
The only thing that I found difficult to say no was when people need my help. But over the years, I've learned to say no because they seemed to have depended on me too much. But when it comes to parties, gatherings, etc, I always know how to find a good alibi. I'm not someone who can be easily influenced by parties and such.
3 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
You seem to be a generous person. Keep it up.
2 people like this
@miketagz (7433)
• Philippines
5 Mar
Being generous too much was a bad idea, in the end they will forget you because it may think that you may pointed out that you are useless. I will be base on the song Too Much Love will Kill you by Europe.
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
Too much love can certainly make people to call you a fool. I wouldn't put my head out when I know the consequences for me are severe. Maybe these individuals are afraid of hurting the other party. But what kind of fear is that.
1 person likes this
@miketagz (7433)
• Philippines
5 Mar
@mydanods That's the reality. But if those people are concern about you then it's the best to trust them.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@miketagz Trust them with what?
1 person likes this
• Peoria, Arizona
5 Mar
I am an introvert, so I say no to gatherings a lot. I normally feel bad and feel like I disappointed the host. When I say yes, it means like I just said screw it, and finally decided to do something reckless because of the thrill and fun. I feel like that is how most people are. We don't plan to have a bad night, just crazy and fun..
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
I am also a reflective introvert. I can say yes to a gathering unless I know who and who were invited.
• Peoria, Arizona
5 Mar
@mydanods I just rather be a homebody haha being around people exhausts me. Even talking to many people at one time online, not even verbal, just typing just drains me. It is crazy.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@DesirousDreamer Typing drains me also.
@Hannihar (29644)
5 Mar
There are people that are too nice and afraid to hurt someone's feelings so cannot say no to them.
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
What if they get hurt by saying yes? Do they consider that? That is what I am thinking about here.
1 person likes this
@saritflor (1711)
• Israel
5 Mar
I believe it has to do with psychological matters as being too shy, no confident or afraid of bad reaction that might comes after we give "no".
2 people like this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
But there might be consequences for saying yes!
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (18039)
• Delhi, India
5 Mar
It's tough for me too to say NO to people as I fear how would they take it. I know I am wrong as in such case I am driven by them but what to say when I don't want to get bad in his or her eyes.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
You could say you want some time to think about it. Then kill the time. That way you never said yes or no.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (18039)
• Delhi, India
5 Mar
@mydanods I know few people who would ask after the time you had given is over. They just wait for for your reply.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
@sjvg1976 Then say you are still thinking about it that it's not an easy decision for you. Nobody ever felt hurt by that.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
6 Mar
if i dont like going i say no i wont pretend it doesnt matter if the other person will be annoyed its her or his problem
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
6 Mar
You really say it like you feel it. It's good to be forthright but you should be kind on people's feelings sometimes although you have to watch out for yourself also.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Mar
@mydanods some people here(filipinos) force you to go with them which annoys me more they simply dont respect decisions
1 person likes this
@deba12 (1111)
• India
6 Mar
I feel bad thinking that my saying No to that person will hurt his feelings. However if he or she demands anything wrong, I vehemently say them No, without thinking about their emotions.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
6 Mar
No, no to wrong requests. That's what I like.
@marlina (71284)
• Canada
5 Mar
i usually have no trouble saying no.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6782)
• Nigeria
5 Mar
I can then say you're forthright. Straight to the point kind of person.