AM I UNGRATEFUL?
By Amaka
@ammyluv (611)
Abuja, Nigeria
March 18, 2018 9:34am CST
Hey Everyone,
How are you all doing? Well, today as been so sad for me. I just don't feel happy today.
I feel I'm not where I'm supposed to be. I mean, I had life goals and I don't think, I've achieved half of the things that I want in life
Sometimes, I look at my peeps and I get so mad and angry at the world. I kept asking myself, why can't I have all that I need?
I came from a very poor home growing up. My siblings and I never had what other kids had at that time. We barely managed to feed and went to school. My parents did their best. They tried to make life fun and sweet in their own capacity.
But now, I am working and doing a little bit okay, but I want more. I don't need all the money in this world, but I want to be able to have the things I need without having to labour so hard for it. I'm not talking about the easy way out here, but at least things shouldn't be this hard.
I can count so many times that I have been wanting to have for the past 2 year yet, I don't have the resources to get those things. Am I ungrateful? Should I be thankful for the position I am today?
A lot of people are in the hospital right now with all the money yet, they are helpless while some are laying at the mortuaries. A lot of people are homeless with no place to live. Should life be all about these things? Should I be happy I'm not in any of these places right now and that's it?
I went to the motherless baby home yesterday and I wept bitterly. Those kids are living in poverty yet they are so happy of the little they have. Am I being inconsiderate? Should I at least count myself blessed? Why do I feel so left out sometimes. Like, I'm lacking behind?
Should I just be thankful that I'm not homeless, and the fact I'm way better to a lot of people? What about those who are way ahead of me? Do they have two heads? I work hard more than most of them yet, they are so blessed and things are moving so well for them.
I guess, you just can't understand how this world works! I don't know what to feel anymore and I don't to know if I'm only privileged to the air that I breath that's all. This is way beyond me. Why can't all fingers be equal? Why do some people have it all? Isn't that unfair?
Thank you for reading
Image: www.ulizalinks.co
15 people like this
19 responses
@Courage7 (19633)
• United States
18 Mar 18
It is tough to sometimes accept our position in life I know it.
For the most part that is what it is..acceptance, but without ever giving up.
Just because we see less fortunate in life, it does not mean we cannot criticize our own positions.
I never give up dreaming if I will win that dang lottery lol
3 people like this
@marguicha (215325)
• Chile
18 Mar 18
It is normal to feel that way if you are young. Later you will discover that there are things more important than money. You have education and enough money to be using internet and a computer. At least, that´s what I can gather from your post. Add something to your profile and you will get more views.
2 people like this
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
Something like what please? Yes, money isn't everything but at least I should have a little to take care of my needs. I don't need to be the next Bill Gate. I should be able to get the reasonable things that I want in life and not save like forever to get just 1 out of 20. And by the time I'm able to save up a little, my needs might have increased to 30 so I'm always in want. It's so sad and frustrating.
Thank you for your advice. Please what do you suggest I add to my profile to get more views..
1 person likes this
@marguicha (215325)
• Chile
18 Mar 18
@ammyluv I would like to know your age and maybe what do you do for a living or what are your interests. As for money and needs, I agree that there is a need of money for important things. No one (and I mean nobody) should be hungry or in need of health care or education according to his abilities. The rest, I would call them luxuries. And although everyone is entitled to a luxury, we have to choose and fight for it.
1 person likes this
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
@marguicha Okay! I get all you've said. Thank you
1 person likes this
@sabtraversa (12890)
• Italy
18 Mar 18
I removed envy from my life, because I know that, those who have more than me, are still unsatisfied for some reason and want more.
And your struggles make you stronger compared to those who were born lucky. 
Personally, being less fortunate motivates me more, because I can prove to be better than those who have privileges, if I ever get to their level, with my own strength. 
Personally, being less fortunate motivates me more, because I can prove to be better than those who have privileges, if I ever get to their level, with my own strength. 2 people like this
@MALUSE (69413)
• Germany
18 Mar 18
You've already understood that the perspective is what makes you happy or unhappy. Concentrate on the people who have more than you do, and you'll always suffer. Look at the poor ones and you'll know that you're lucky.
What I miss in your post is that you haven't mentioned the things you can't afford but seem to find necessary for a fulfilled life.
2 people like this
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
@MALUSE I know! These things you mentioned are way beyond my budget. I'm not even thinking towards that direction. I'm talking about things that should be normal. Life shouldn't be this difficult. I want a better life like the one I am having now. I want a better job that is just the main thing. Having a good job can take care of things. I want to be able to change my shoes because it's old and change my phone because it's old, but I don't have such privilege. My shoes will have to be worn out before I can even change them the same goes to other things. Like I said, I don't want to bore you with my needs and start naming them one after the other. I simply need a good life at least, but I understand your concerns and I'm so grateful for it. Thank you so much
@levis2020 (171)
• Philippines
18 Mar 18
Set a goal, focus on your goal, learn new skills, especially on how to start your own business. There is unfairness and inequality in our society but we could not do anything about it. But we can change our lives for the better by having a specific goal and work hard to achieve it.
2 people like this
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
Yeah, at a point, I had to acquire some certifications. I had to go hungry for some months just to achieve that. I wanted to have an edge over others at least, but here I am. Sometimes, it doesn't matter the skills you ve got, it's all about favor you know. Nevertheless, I won't stop working hard to achieve my goals. Thank you so much
1 person likes this
@levis2020 (171)
• Philippines
18 Mar 18
@ammyluv If you fail one time, don't get discourage. Many successful people failed many times before they succeeded. Keep on improving yourself, focus on positive things in life and keep on trying. The skills you've got matters a lot. It may not matter in some cases, but at the right time and opportunity, you will benefit from having it. There are so much promises of success out there, we do not permit a single failure to define our worth.
1 person likes this
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
@levis2020 Thank you! This made sense.
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18174)
• Orangeville, Ontario
19 Mar 18
I kind of grew up the opposite. My father was a great money manager and I imagine he made a pretty good pay cheque. But if we wanted something we didn't NEED, we had to earn the money to buy it ourselves. We weren't handed stuff but I adopted his money management skills and had a nice tidy bank account until men came into my life... and then after my second child I got a chronic illness. Now I'm living the opposite. I am not used to living poor but here I am 20 years sick and dependent on my husband. I want to travel, we need a new car, we want to be able to provide better for our kids (who are young adults but are also struggling through life).
When I think the way you do, which is often, the people around me give me heck telling me to get up and do something about it. Positive people and motivators can make the rest of us feel so depressed and guilty.
I don't have any answers for you, just know that you are not alone.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
18 Mar 18
Sending you lots of best wishes and hope things will get so much better for you.
@ammyluv (611)
• Abuja, Nigeria
18 Mar 18
OKay! Let me give you an example...I have been applying to all these I(NGO)for like 3 years now yet It's so difficult to gain employment with any of those INGOs, but there are people who would apply for just once and they will be employed. People that I know I am better than them (not that I'm proud or trying to be little anyone but I just want to make a point) so why can't I be employed like others? The people that are getting the job offers do they have two heads? It's really sad, but I guess that's life
@augusta123 (6649)
•
18 Mar 18
Count your blessings dear and you would be surprised.....
1 person likes this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
18 Mar 18
I also have those questions in my mind. You are not alone. I question why things tend to be unfair. But you are not being ungrateful because it is natural to feel that way. It is also okay to want what others have but the difference is the action you will do in order to achieve what they have. Either you work hard to achieve it or drown in the sea of envy. As my dad always say, you will someday shine. Others had it earlier, and others later, but the bottomline is you achieved it.
1 person likes this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
18 Mar 18
@ammyluv Youre most welcome, my friend. 
1 person likes this
@PurnaSharma (2557)
• Guwahati, India
20 Mar 18
At least you could think.So I realized you're rich by your thinking.Things comes and goes on but depends on you how firm you are to deal with.
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
2 Aug 18
I remember the time when I was in college. I could have not even gone to college because my destiny was to tend our store after graduating from high school but my class adviser and some classmates came over to our house/store and convinced my mother (who in turn asked my father) to send me to college. I was then sent to college and I took the entrance exams and even topped it to get an academic scholarship. My weekly allowance then was 25 pesos (the currency in our country) which covered the fare from my home city to the capital city on Sunday afternoon and the return trip to my home on Satruday morning. The 25 pesos likewise covered for my breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack and dinner. Despite the meager amount, I would still be able to save some amount and buy something for my siblings and parents when I came home. On the other hand, my roommate would receive 2,000 pesos from his brother who worked as manager in a logging company in Indonesia. The 2,000 however, would be easily gone as he goes gambling and drinking as soon as he gets the money from the bank. I finished college later and still he had not graduated from high school. That's it - I was contented with what little I had and make do with it.
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
2 Aug 18
I think the key is contentment. Be happy and contented with what you have and be grateful for them. Count your blessings and not what you don't have. With this, you'll start to find contentment with what you have and appreciate life with all its ups and downs.
@LPort2017 (693)
• United States
19 Mar 18
Remember, this is a personal journey. We all have personal opinions, feelings, and thoughts about our lifestyles. Begin to write down your feelings and thoughts into a journal or notebook. Reflect on your feelings and make a plan to get some of the things you want, but change your attitude be grateful and content in the present. Good luck!
@arunima25 (85265)
• Bangalore, India
11 Jul 18
Feelings are not debatable and the way you feel is quite natural for any human being to feel in the situation you are. We all learn an important lesson by living and accumulating experiences...." Life is unfair to all. It is just that grass looks greener on the other side of the fence". Everyone has sufferings...the forms are different..physical, mental, emotional, financial...the problem varies.
