A More Positive Post

March 25, 2018 11:26am CST
My parenting life has always been chaotic. My house a mess. My sink full of dishes (no dishwasher, sadly). There's always been a reason.... kids were little, I was overwhelmed. Kids got bigger, then my son died. I was overwhelmed. Then I started working part-time and juggling a lot. I was overwhelmed. In the meanwhile, years have passed and my kids haven't been properly taught to do things they should do. 4 of my 5 are helpful anyway, but they still need to be trained to be better at cleaning up after themselves, helping around the house, etc. So I have finally implemented, this week, step one in training them. Step one is that everyone has a dish day. There are 6 of us, living, in our family. That means one day per person with one extra day. Even my husband, who never does dishes, now has a day of dishes. Today will be the toughest. My one kid who is lazy. And he has had a super busy weekend training all weekend for a summer job. So he's going to be tired tonight when I GENTLY remind him that it is his night for dishes. My happy moment though is with my seven year old. She is the most enthusiastic about it. She wants to help with dishes. She didn't hesitate when I reminded her of her turn. Ah yes, i'm starting early enough with her! No excuses! She'll be the one kid who learns as they should, all along. I'm still juggling a lot. I'm juggling more than ever. Which means that I need the help of my kids now more than ever. So this week is step one.... We'll get this routine under way, then we'll move onto another step. I know I have a lot I want to teach the kids. My 16 year old, the lazy one, well, he may be won't learn anymore from me. He's had the nature that he has all along. he is the one, however, who is contemplating military. I think that could be the best thing in the world for him. (completely different topic, yes.)
8 people like this
10 responses
@andriaperry (46597)
• United States
25 Mar
My dad gave us an allowance, it was not much back then, I think it was $5 a week and we did all the chores and he bought the food, paid all the bills, bought us clothes a couple times a year. Since there was just 2 of us we ganged up on the daily chores, got them done and we were free to do whatever we wanted.
2 people like this
25 Mar
we don't have a good routine. i just say "hey, #2, help clean living room." or "hey, #4, switch the laundry for me" or "hey, kids 3,4,5, fold laundry while you watch tv." and they do..... but we lack routine. that's what i'm trying to fix.
@moffittjc (41251)
• Gainesville, Florida
25 Mar
I think giving your kids chores to do will be really good for them. It helps you out, and teaches them responsibility. You are wise to introduce a little at a time to them, so they don't get overwhelmed themselves or discouraged. I did something similar with my kids. We started with making their beds, then cleaning their rooms, then cleaning their bathroom, then helping in the kitchen, and finally other household chores (laundry, vacuuming, washing cars, etc). There were setbacks along the way, and lots of complaining, but the kids are now pretty self-sufficient now that they are teens. They're good about responsibility now.
1 person likes this
25 Mar
my other kids (not the lazy one... hhahha) help me all the time, but it's kind of chaotic. we don't have a good routine. i just say "hey, #2, help clean living room." or "hey, #4, switch the laundry for me" or "hey, kids 3,4,5, fold laundry while you watch tv." and they do..... but we lack routine.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (41251)
• Gainesville, Florida
26 Mar
@jillybean1222 Oh, that makes sense. But do any kids have routines these days when it comes to chores? My kids have a list of chores they have to do, but I don't think they have any special routine that they follow for getting them done.
@Platespinner (16529)
• Winston Salem, North Carolina
25 Mar
My kids still have dish duty. Usually one washes and someone else dries. They have other responsibilities as well. My oldest was always the biggest grumbler and the quickest to find excuses for not helping out, the rest may sigh with exasperation when I interrupt them with a chore, but they usually do what I ask them to do. Teaching teenagers is HARD when they think they know it all already.
1 person likes this
25 Mar
we don't have a good routine. i just say "hey, #2, help clean living room." or "hey, #4, switch the laundry for me" or "hey, kids 3,4,5, fold laundry while you watch tv." and they do..... but we lack routine. i do worry it's too late with my 16 year old.... but the others have more helpful natures..... 16 year old is a good kid. he's just my struggle lately
1 person likes this
• Winston Salem, North Carolina
25 Mar
@jillybean1222 don't think in terms of too late. You can't change yesterday anyhow so focus on today. It may be tough, but you're doing the right thing. It may seem a bit late, but better late than never.
@wolfgirl569 (2586)
• Marion, Ohio
25 Mar
I started young with both my boys. I also added the incentive of an allowance as they got older. But of course their chore list increased as they grew also. It is never to late to start.
1 person likes this
25 Mar
i often offer little monetary incentives to the kids for helping with "extras".... during december, i was struggling a lot to manage stuff and they earned a lot by helping me with stuff that i normally do. we don't have a good routine. i just say "hey, #2, help clean living room." or "hey, #4, switch the laundry for me" or "hey, kids 3,4,5, fold laundry while you watch tv." and they do..... but we lack routine.
• Marion, Ohio
25 Mar
@jillybean1222 setting a routine can help a lot. I kept it written on the calendar each month. By doing that the boys had no excuses once they were old enough to read. And just like a regular job they got weekends off except for taking care of the animals that they each claimed. They needed to know that animals are dependent on us for the care when kept in captivity.
@RasmaSandra (16629)
• Riga, Latvia
25 Mar
That is a great ides and this could possibly help you. Good luck in getting it all organized.
Download this FREE printable house cleaning schedule template & checklist chart and use it for your own household. It's simple, yet expandable.
1 person likes this
25 Mar
thank you
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (29001)
• Canada
25 Mar
I hope that the new chore goes over well, you have to start someplace, and we all eat and dishes do get dirty in that process. Its a great picture.
1 person likes this
25 Mar
we just lack routine. trying to fix that.
1 person likes this
@katsmeow1213 (29029)
• United States
27 Mar
Oh good luck! Getting kids to do chores is every mother's struggle! Mine have had chores all their lives.. it started simple and worked up from there. Each day of the week they have a major room to clean; bathroom (includes laundry), kitchen, or living room, and they each get 2 days per week off from chores. I've re-worked the chore schedule frequently to try to make it easy and fair for them, but they still fight and don't do it. But eventually it does pay off. When my oldest moved out he told me how none of his friends knew how to do laundry except him, because he started doing the family's laundry when he was 10.
@LadyDuck (147879)
• Switzerland
26 Mar
You are doing the right thing assigning jobs to do. They are old enough to start doing things around the house.
@mom210 (6517)
• Atlanta, Georgia
26 Mar
I love this idea. Dishwashers now days are pretty bad, they do not last long and do not do a good job. We run through them n about 3 years, just because we use them so much. 3 meals at home, 12 people, I run three - four loads per day. I was actually thinking of getting rid of mine just beause it does such a bad job. We end up rerunning a lot of the dishes. I ope this owrks out for ya, good luck
• Pamplona, Spain
25 Mar
Great idea and its not easy to put that kind of thing into action without at least one protest. Good luck they will all eventually get to help you out I am sure.