Losing Friends.
By Kandase
@Kandae11 (53679)
March 30, 2018 9:46am CST
Are you afraid to tell a friend what you really think? There are many ways that one can lose a friend or spoil a friendship - and one of those ways is plain talk.
Now - could you sit by and watch a friend head down the wrong path and tell yourself -"let her learn by her own folly?"
I remember advising a friend that the guy she was crazy about was bad news and a womanizer. She didn't believe me and our friendship cooled considerably. Could she have thought that I was interested in him?
I don't know - but she went ahead with the 'romance' which fizzled miserably within a brief two months . And I lost a friend.
I couldn't help wondering if I should have kept what I knew to myself. Have you ever lost a friendship in a similar fashion? Have there been times when you were afraid to tell a friend something which they might not want to hear?
I don't know - but she went ahead with the 'romance' which fizzled miserably within a brief two months . And I lost a friend.
I couldn't help wondering if I should have kept what I knew to myself. Have you ever lost a friendship in a similar fashion? Have there been times when you were afraid to tell a friend something which they might not want to hear?28 people like this
29 responses
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
30 Mar 18
I do not like losing friends except for valid reasons. If it is about love life of a friend, I learned the hard way that I decided to keep my mouth mum and pretend that it never happened. I do not like to divulge on my friends' romantic agendas. I will say a word when things have turned for the worst. Then I can say "I know." hahaha
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
30 Mar 18
@Kandae11 yes, better that way that lose people. For most of the time, we become irrational when love gets in the way. 
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 Mar 18
NO I have never lost a friend for that reason but some I have lost for reasons I will never understand, it just ended.
2 people like this
@Marilynda1225 (79699)
• United States
2 Apr 18
I've lost friends throughout the years for many different reasons. I guess speaking up can contribute to ending a friendship when the other person isn't receptive.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (79699)
• United States
2 Apr 18
@Kandae11 I learned the hard way
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
30 Mar 18
Oh dear. I'm really surprised that the woman dropped you as a friend after your warning.
I really value that input from a friend - even when it's something I don't want to hear. As long as they aren't trying to force me. Just inform me. It makes me think more of that friend.
Then again... usually... I think I would politely say something, but weighing the situation. I have this one friend who is head-over-feet in love with this man who is just using her. I know if I were to say anything she wouldn't accept it in the least... so in her case.... "let her learn by her own folly"
1 person likes this
@FayeHazel (40248)
• United States
30 Mar 18
@Kandae11 Wow, she might be ashamed to admit you were right or something
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (169929)
• United States
31 Mar 18
Not really, but I had to end a friendship with someone who was being ridiculous about some guy. We have all made poor judgments in that area I am sure, but he was living with another woman and she was paying his cellphone, and being abusive with him physically when he showed up..you had to know the situation it was absurdly crazy and she had two daughters..what was she modeling for them? I couldn't take it.
1 person likes this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
1 Apr 18
I suppose in hindsight it might have been a mistake but your intentions were good. Maybe you can patch the friendship up now he is gone. She might even ask your advice next time!
1 person likes this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
2 Apr 18
@Kandae11 Let her cool down a bit. Time takes care of a lot of problems.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (48927)
• United States
1 Apr 18
Im sorry that you lost your friend. I've only lost one good friend in my life and it was because I married my husband who is black. She didn't approve of interracial relationships. I've never missed her.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (325693)
• Rockingham, Australia
1 Apr 18
I am keeping very quiet at the moment about a friend's relationship with her grandson. Much as I feel compelled to say something, I can't see that anything I say will help in any way at all. So it is probably best if I say nothing.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
•
1 Apr 18
I often control my good intention, sometimes for a year. But after that, I will do it if things are still bad, or has become worse. There is such a thing as 'conscience' . With friends, I often keep a distance to their privacy. (I swear they are all wise people with respect to me, a real innocent (naive idiot!) so I never could offer them any advice. I believe in letting those wise people making their own mistakes. (With family members to whom I am a guardian, the matter is different then. I will be ruthless if need be.)
. With friends, I often keep a distance to their privacy. (I swear they are all wise people with respect to me, a real innocent (naive idiot!) so I never could offer them any advice. I believe in letting those wise people making their own mistakes. (With family members to whom I am a guardian, the matter is different then. I will be ruthless if need be.)1 person likes this
@allknowing (130066)
• India
31 Mar 18
On the contrary she should have got back to you on bended knees 
1 person likes this
@Freelanzer (10745)
• Canada
30 Mar 18
The truth hurts and some friends don't like to hear it and may og on the defensive.
1 person likes this
@ridingbet (66857)
• Philippines
31 Mar 18
as a friend, it is our responsibility to enlighten our friends about what is wrong with their lives; a lovelife for example.
but for me, i can give my pieces of advice, and let my friend decide what is better for her.
1 person likes this
@Icydoll (36717)
• India
30 Mar 18
I'm not afraid of giving advice to friends..it's our responsibility as a friend to let him/her in a right path..I just say what I know but it's upto them to take it or not.i have adviced one of my friend too in the same way you did...it's her suffering now...but she still talks with me.our friendship is same :)
1 person likes this
