It's not up to you! It's called MYlot

United Kingdom
April 1, 2018 3:31am CST
I'm so sick of seeing people on here making sweeping statements about the so-called true purpose of mylot and the "correct" way to use it, or telling everyone how to feel, how to argue, how to debate, and how to react. I see people referring to others as "idiotic" because they don't conform to their rigid, robotic way of thinking, and these are grown adults who love to go on about the wisdom that they've supposedly gained with age compared to the stupidity of anyone who dares to be younger than them. Get over yourselves, it's none of your business how someone uses this site as long as they're not breaking the rules. If someone, either brand new to the site or already here for years, wants to start a few new discussions one after the other, that's their choice. If someone wants to talk about their meals and nothing else, that's their choice, or if they choose to only talk about religion and politics and you don't like it, tough. As long as they're not breaking the rules or trolling for the pointless sake of it, it's none of your business. I find it disgusting that so many people expect respect but don't know how to give it. We were all 13 once, but we should all grow out of that selfish attitude, especially before we're into middle age.
33 people like this
32 responses
@JudyEv (325759)
• Rockingham, Australia
1 Apr 18
Well written and I totally agree with you. None of us have to read anything we don't want. We all have the option to move on if we're not interested in the particular topic.
8 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
Thank you Obviously there's the argument that I should take my own advice and ignore posts that are getting to me, but the fact is I do that up to a point. I draw the line at name calling and delusions of grandeur
4 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
1 Apr 18
Exactly!
5 people like this
@hereandthere (45651)
• Philippines
1 Apr 18
there are several people here much younger than me who seem to have already evolved many times and ahead of me. i am awed and humbled by and keep learning from them. there are things i notice here that i don't remember in the old mylot. but then, others might not agree so i end up questioning my memories of the old mylot.
6 people like this
• Philippines
2 Apr 18
@epiffanie it means you're very open minded, even after all you've been through
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
I wonder if I have rose tinted glasses when it comes to the old mylot, my memory isn't great so I can't really remember how long I was gone between old and new, and I first joined when I was 17 so that probably makes me look back on it as though everything was better then
3 people like this
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
1 Apr 18
@hereandthere ... same here with me.. I found that I have more to learn from the younger ones ...
2 people like this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
1 Apr 18
Posted in true Brit style I've been criticised a few times since I've been here so I know what you mean.
4 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
It baffles me! The same people laud themselves endlessly for being the "right" kind of person, the "right" kind of mylotter, at the same time as being needlessly insulting to whole swathes of people who don't conform to their views. They tell people how to react to things and yet they can't rein in their own self-obsession when it comes to it. Of course they don't see it as self-obsession because they can't see past the end of their noses, they think that their opinions and feelings are somehow more valid than everyone else's. We can all be selfish at times, and that's human, but the level of hypocrisy here is astounding
4 people like this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack Listen to Nanny Sprite and count to ten. They aren't worth the anger they make you feel. Who has upset you, send them to me and I will deal with them!
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
@sprite1950 I've given myself a headache I'll listen to a comedy podcast and forget about it for a while, then I'll come back and do some more lurking
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (134458)
• Roseburg, Oregon
1 Apr 18
Everything in your discussion I agree with and it is so true. We can write as many discussions as we want in a day, Each person is different. So each person will interact in their own way.
5 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
Exactly! I think some of these people would prefer it if they were in charge of the site, and probably the world but they don't realise that we're all human and, as such, very very different, and they wouldn't last long in that position if it came to it
2 people like this
@Morleyhunt (21737)
• Canada
1 Apr 18
You can write what you want...as often as you want. I will choose to read, like or comment if and when I choose to.
4 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
Exactly
2 people like this
@Kandae11 (53679)
1 Apr 18
You are perfectly correct, members should be free to write what they want - providing it doesn't break the site's rules. And that also means being free to give their views on how or what others should write - no one has to take them seriously.
5 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
Yes everyone's free to do that but name calling is cruel, I don't understand why anyone thinks that their opinion is so superior that they're right to call other people idiots for using mylot in a different way
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
@Kandae11 I've been lurking more than posting recently and I seem to see it more and more from a small few people
3 people like this
@Kandae11 (53679)
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack I am totally against name calling - that is definitely out of order. Thankfully I have come upon very few such comments - but of course I don't read every post and comments, so I must have missed them - happily.
2 people like this
@AmbiePam (85484)
• United States
1 Apr 18
I love this. I wonder if some of the people who read it will realize they are the ones you are talking about. Because you are so right.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
I think one of them might have done, because "idiotic" seems to be one of their favourite words and I made a point of quoting directly
2 people like this
@AmbiePam (85484)
• United States
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack I think you are right.
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (169940)
• United States
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack There is no call for that, and I think mylot should not allow it personally.
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (169940)
• United States
1 Apr 18
You are absolutely right, and I don't like the control freaks here, nor do I feel anyone should tell anyone else what to write..if you don't like a discussion move on!!
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (169940)
• United States
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack because they aren't, they want to act superior by setting themselves up as holier than thou, or the fount of all knowledge. I don't like to block people but I blocked two of those types because I did not like their attitude.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
@snowy22315 I'm not sure I have anyone blocked yet, but that's not because I don't like the idea, it's just because the block feature doesn't work as I'd like it to If I want to block someone I'd like it to be more in the way it's done on Facebook
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
Precisely! I try my best to keep my nose out and I do well most of the time, but I don't like name-calling or people acting like they're better than others for daft reasons
2 people like this
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
1 Apr 18
I am an evil one out here. I fight with fanatics. I have been told that more people are converting into a specific religion because they find merits in it, and I had to enlighten the girl no, it is because of no control in population in that religion that the number of people in that religion is increasing. She gently withdrew because she did not want to lose the battle, but she did not admit the truth either. I try to trigger reasoning. I do get worked up at times. But I try to keep it as polite as possible. I hope that if I raise my doubts, the person would seek answers and realize that others are not that wrong after all, and from there they will become more tolerant and patient, rather than hold my daddy strongest attitude. I may be wrong, but I simply feel I must do it.
3 people like this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
1 Apr 18
This post is about ... "I see people referring to others as "idiotic" because they don't conform to their rigid, robotic way of thinking, ..." Okay, substitute fanatics for idiots. I don't know who you referring to and perhaps that person was and is a real fanatic or a real idiot. I really don't know. If you feel you must do this go right ahead. I am not a fan of the daddy atheism attitude that determines anyone that has a religious belief is delusional and therefore is an idiot. But that might not be your religious stand as I don't really know you all that well.
3 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
I don't think that's wrong at all, you're doing what I wish we could all do, but some find it easier to insult and some, like me, find it easier to silently seethe until we post something like this I'm a sensitive soul and even healthy debate gives me a headache But I wish I wasn't like that! I wish I could do what you do, but anxiety holds me back as I can't handle the physical symptoms of psychological stress.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
@Bluedoll I don't know if you're replying to me or vanny
2 people like this
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
1 Apr 18
There’s one that I avoid interacting with because I just get that feeling that no matter what, the person finds something not quite right in others.. lol ..
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
I wonder if I'm thinking of the right person, I think I am because there's only one member I can think of who fully embodies that description
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
3 Apr 18
1 person likes this
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
3 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack OOH! I can read your mind! ..
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
1 Apr 18
Of course, "MY"Lot :P My world, my domain, my way. I would hope people would respect my wishes, but it's not like I can control what they do.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
It's not yourlot, it's mylot!
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
@OneOfMany Exactly, it's mine, not yours!
2 people like this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack It's not 'yours' either!
2 people like this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
1 Apr 18
S'up? Did the Easter Bunny get you up early this sunny April 1st?
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
I forgot about April Fool's Day, that's how mad I am My son and his Easter spirit (aka bananas and Easter egg for breakfast) are the only things keeping me sane today
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
@pgntwo Leonard loves rice cakes, I make fun of him cos his diet is extremely varied but everything in it is really plain He's not that interested in chocolate but he does like it occasionally so I was the only one to get him an easter egg and everyone else got him little presents like sticker books and stuff
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack Toast and blackcurrant jam and an apple before our youngest was allowed to tuck into a piece of his Oreo Easter egg. Now he's on rice cakes and Smarties...
2 people like this
• Northampton, England
1 Apr 18
In light of the Facebook thing and the fact some of these sites are really about gathering private info you have to wonder ...
3 people like this
@vandana7 (98826)
• India
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack Whether disclosing our thinking is that wise. But I doubt if they can spend ages sifting through the information. So most of the time, it does not matter. When it matters, it really does.
3 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
What are we wondering here? That's gone straight over my head
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
1 Apr 18
Youve got a point. Maybe we have gotten childish that we only think of ourselves and forgot what respect is all about. This is maybe the reminder that we need. Thank you!
3 people like this
• United Kingdom
1 Apr 18
I think the bigger origin of this way of thinking is likely to be the fault of the media and those with power, as they pit us against each other and make it normal for us to feel divided when in reality we're all one despite our differences
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
1 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack I agree with what you said. We were dictated as to how we will think and react and then make us fight each other, which I think is favorable to the media and those with power. We have become gullible. So sad how we were made to be like this.
2 people like this
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
2 Apr 18
I do agree, I keep saying everyone has a choice to comment or just move on if they don't like the discussion.
2 people like this
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
4 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack I totally agree, but that is what I was talking about, if you don't like a discussion or a person just move on. I have done it.
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
Some people seem to spend an awful lot of their time monitoring others, and that's absolutely fine, and of course it's also totally fine for anyone to talk or complain about things they don't like, but when they start saying people are stupid for doing what they do I think that's mean
1 person likes this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
2 Apr 18
I just ignore discussions that don't grab my interest. There are so many that do. I try to be respectful to everyone, even if I disagree, and don't expect others to always agree with me. I like myLot because it has been a place where people can discuss subjects they disagree about without getting ugly about it. It's by sharing different points of view and trying to see things from another's perspective that we learn. Sometimes we form our opinions because our perspective is limited by past experiences and incomplete knowledge.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
That last sentence is so important and of course applies to life in general as well as just mylot/online stuff
2 people like this
• Philippines
2 Apr 18
Well, If I don't like the person I block them and if it's a violation of guidelines I report them. But sometimes I check myself before I react because maybe I can be just sensitive and doesn't check twice what was written on the comment.
2 people like this
• Philippines
2 Apr 18
true. i just saw someone misinterpret a response in her discussion when i can tell that wasn't the intention at all. when i went back 2 days after to check, i'm glad the responder explained her side.. the responder was also surprised by the extreme reaction of the discussion starter.
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
I also have to try to revise my first impressions quite often!
1 person likes this
@cintol (11261)
• United States
1 Apr 18
If I don't agree with something I just don't read it, your right, everyone has a right to what they do on this site.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
I hope my point has come across as I intended, because I don't want to be thought of as a hypocrite on this one! I know some here have felt like I'm doing exactly the same thing I'm pointing out in others, but my view is that it's not necessary to look down on people or call them names just because we do things differently
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
@cintol Thanks
1 person likes this
@cintol (11261)
• United States
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack No, thats how I took it, you weren't being judgmental with anyone just pointing out a fact that no one else should judge how someone or what they write about. You did a good job and if others don't understand it, they don't have to read it!
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129453)
• Israel
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack Thank you and very well put. This needed to be said and glad you did it.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
Thank you, I know that it could come across as me doing exactly the same thing I'm complaining about but it's not that, all I wish is that people would be respectful and think at least briefly about other people's feelings and points of view before they start making their demands
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129453)
• Israel
2 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack You are so welcome and thank you for that LIlyLoretta.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
1 Apr 18
wow, so you did join ages ago! I used to be a bit annoyed with whoever trying to set up guidelines for me and others to follow, but with times, I realized that they didn't know that that was not OK. Some of those have turned out to be very decent too (as in, nice), so I have learned to not notice those posts from them.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
2 Apr 18
I joined originally 11 years ago, when I was 17 - it was quite different for me then because I was so young and I had an awful lot of time to spend here
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
3 Apr 18
@YrNemo That's a great idea
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (20261)
3 Apr 18
@LilyBeBack In ten years time, you could delegate the task of writing and comment to that little boy there .
1 person likes this