How do you react when a friend ignores you?

August 11, 2018 8:09am CST
We all have friends that we want to keep no matter what and I had one who goes way back almost 7 years now as friends. We had a long distance friendship and it's weird that even how long we didn't communicate, he suddenly comes back and hangs out with me when he is in the city. I understand he had been going through a lot what with personal issues with his family and work issues. However, the real draw was when I needed him because I too had my family issues and he was not there. He just ignored my message and that was the real deal. I decided to move forward and cut off communication because it was clear to me that when he needs me, I am there for him but when I need him, he is not there. Also, I gave him about a month to at least give the benefit of the doubt but clearly it wasn't working. So, how you guys deal with it?
13 people like this
14 responses
@sol_cee (38223)
• Philippines
11 Aug 18
You’ve known each other for a long time. Has he always been like that? Or...
1 person likes this
@sol_cee (38223)
• Philippines
12 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 maybe he has valid reasons why he couldn’t message you back?
12 Aug 18
He has always been like this but it didn't bother me much until now. I guess I thought we were closer than before. That is because I was there when he had a lot of problems recently and when it was my turn, he just couldn't bother to message back.
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14 Aug 18
I doubt. He didn't respond for a long time now about a month
@Janet357 (75656)
12 Aug 18
i ignore them back. lol
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13 Aug 18
This would be so ideal
@Janet357 (75656)
13 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 yes because we cannot please everyone.
@JustBhem (70555)
• Davao, Philippines
11 Aug 18
I also have the same sentiments with one of my close friends. And I know the feeling of rejection. I moved on already and stay civil with each other.
1 person likes this
@JustBhem (70555)
• Davao, Philippines
12 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 Yes, we need to.
12 Aug 18
It's too easy to think of the things we've done for the other person and it sucks to know if it's so imbalanced. It's great that time helps us to move on.
1 person likes this
• Agra, India
11 Aug 18
If this is the case, the person does not deserve you at all
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12 Aug 18
Yes, that's true. It's his loss anyways.
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• Agra, India
12 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 yes...and I'm sure he will regret it some day
@BabeSays (8576)
• Mauritius
11 Aug 18
I'd do the same. If in hard time he wasn't there for you and has been ignoring all your messagez then he doesn't deserve your friendship. You are a nice person so please move on and make new friend who would care for you and treats you well.
1 person likes this
12 Aug 18
That's really true. I couldn't agree more. I can never tolerate selfishness in a friendship. I notice that this is my pet peeve and is usually the reason why I end friendships.
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@BabeSays (8576)
• Mauritius
12 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 I don't blame you. I think you are and did the right thing. I would have done the same.
@MACQUUNE (513)
• Lagos, Nigeria
22 Aug 18
I will think about God who cannot ignore me
1 person likes this
22 Aug 18
Thanks. This made me smile.
@LeaPea2417 (36399)
• Toccoa, Georgia
11 Aug 18
It is interesting you have written about this topic right at this moment because I am in a very similar situation. It is a long distance friendship and this person has always been there for me to at least say hello to, until recently. This person is Muslim and I am really thinking the reason I can't get in touch at the moment is because he is going to the Hajj that is coming up later this month. But, I don't know it for sure, it is just what I think. I am so hoping that by next month when all the religious festivities are over, he will be back to conversation. So, the relationship is not over yet. I am just hoping and praying that religious obligations are being focused on at the moment, because I have known this person for a long time.
1 person likes this
12 Aug 18
Your friend is lucky as you are very understanding of the situation. I have tried understanding him too but only time will tell if the friendship remains the same. Thanks for sharing.
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@JudyEv (325398)
• Rockingham, Australia
12 Aug 18
I would do much the same. In the end, the only one you can really rely on is yourself.
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13 Aug 18
That;s really true.
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@Hannihar (129379)
• Israel
21 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 I had a friend that we were best friends in high school. When I came to live in Israel I went back only two times. One was the beginning to bring things here and the other was to make some money and then leave and not go back. My mother passed away and I knew I could not mourn her there so I did what I was suppose to do and mourned her here. Well, this friend sent me a letter and the obituary and was angry and when i wrote back and asked what was going on she never let me know. So, I let go of the past and moved on to my life here. I may never know what was going on with her because the only way I would see her now is if she came here and not so sure I would want to see her.
@Hannihar (129379)
• Israel
21 Aug 18
@Phinyf27 I could take a guess and think maybe she thought I was not going to mourn my mother because i did not go back. I mourned her the right way here that they would not do there or because I am not going bacthere and she could be angry about that.
22 Aug 18
@Hannihar Yes, I would think so. Maybe she thought you changed and that you are indifferent now.
1 person likes this
21 Aug 18
This is really sad.I wish people we call friends would see what's we're going through instead of ignoring.
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@Lumartz (372)
14 Aug 18
I will ignore him/her too.
@Starmaiden (9311)
• Canada
11 Aug 18
Life happens and people change. Sometimes our paths take us down very different roads than our friends and we become distant. It is best to not hold on and just let it go.
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12 Aug 18
Yes, it gets harder if we try to rationalize for the other person's behalf.
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@Aiya2218 (54)
• Manila, Philippines
17 Aug 18
It was really hard for me when my friend ignores me, but when i think of maybe she has her own reason and i said to myself that maybe one day she will realize how important our friendship and then she can still come to me... i will be always her friend no matter what.
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@jvgomd (20)
13 Aug 18
I have to say that your friendship sounds very one-sided. You're all ears for him when he needs you but when when the time came the YOU actually needed HIM ... he did not even bother. If I were you I would just cut this friend off completely, you have absolutely no use for someone who cannot reciprocate what you give to him. That being said. the blessing of your deed is the deed itself. You helped someone when they needed someone the most - it's pretty Mother Teresa like but that is the reward. Kudos to you!
1 person likes this
14 Aug 18
It's even ironic because we had a long talk the last time he came back here in the city. He shared to me all his family problems and he also told me all about his childhood and how SELFLESS he is. lol I could just laugh it off. It's too bad he lost a friend due to being in fact selfish.
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
15 Aug 18
Some friends stick through thick and thin, some dont's .