not a sleeping beauty

September 18, 2018 12:26pm CST
I am so very tired. It's a culmination of many things. My MiLs death and the paperwork, the house sorting, the contact with extended family, the worry ... Being back at work after the summer holidays and getting into a new routine of being up ten minutes earlier due to bus changes. I should probably go to bed ten minutes earlier too, but hey-ho. My knee. So. Much. Pain. Not knowing which students I'm supposed to be supporting till twenty to nine in the morning. I love my routine. The lack of it is creating an inner-torment. The whole negative buzz at work. It's just excruciating. I work with some utter numpties. A few times last week saw me nearly falling asleep in lessons. It happened again today. As i drift into Nod my writing goes from beatifully legible to GPs scrawl. Even I can't read it, and I'm pretty good with all sorts of handwriting usually. So sleepy.
6 people like this
7 responses
@LadyDuck (458006)
• Switzerland
19 Sep 18
You cannot imagine how much I understand your situation. It's already 9 months that my mother has gone and I am still dealing with paperwork and plenty of bureaucratic problems. I want to disappear.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (458006)
• Switzerland
20 Sep 18
@Poppylicious I agree, disappear in a peaceful place where nobody can find us. I am almost depressed.
2 people like this
19 Sep 18
We should disappear together, just for a few days!
2 people like this
@JustBhem (70555)
• Davao, Philippines
19 Sep 18
Have a sound sleep then, you need it.
1 person likes this
19 Sep 18
Sleep will help, of course, but this isn't just a lack of sleep exhaustion. I am weary. My body is weary. My mind is weary. :(
1 person likes this
21 Sep 18
@JustBhem I imagine it happens to you a lot, what with the dialysis. When Husband was on haemoD he was constantly weary.
1 person likes this
@JustBhem (70555)
• Davao, Philippines
20 Sep 18
@Poppylicious It happens to me sometimes too.
1 person likes this
@amadeo (111948)
• United States
18 Sep 18
are you doing anything about the knee pain.did you see an orthopedic on this. my good ness falling asleep in class.Do not like the sound of this.but this is your business there. Pain can be tolerate if you do something about it
1 person likes this
19 Sep 18
I have a hospital appointment with Rheumatology on the 19th of October. It's actually getting to the point where I am so used to the pain that I only notice it when I remember it exists! The falling asleep is bad. I should take a few days off work, but it's too early in the academic year. I shall muddle along.
@Plethos (13560)
• United States
18 Sep 18
your body and mind are not rested. maybe in a future weekend youll be able to just rest and do nothing.
1 person likes this
19 Sep 18
You're completely spot on. This weekend we have more MiL business to deal with, but maybe the following weekend can be all about us, doing things we want to do, rather than have to do.
1 person likes this
@Plethos (13560)
• United States
20 Sep 18
@Poppylicious - yup, does sound like your body is exhausted.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129431)
• Israel
21 Sep 18
@Poppylicious It sounds like you have a lot on your plate.
1 person likes this
21 Sep 18
I suppose, but compared to others it is quite trivial.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129431)
• Israel
23 Sep 18
@Poppylicious Maybe so or maybe not. Your feelings and what you are going through is important to you.
1 person likes this
@Janet357 (75656)
21 Sep 18
Take a break. We cant do many things at a time. We are human, we get tired, we need to take care of ourselves to function better.
1 person likes this
21 Sep 18
True, but taking a break feels like giving up. And I know it isn't, but that's how it feels.
1 person likes this
24 Sep 18
@Janet357 Life? *laughs*
@Janet357 (75656)
21 Sep 18
@Poppylicious is there something that you would like to achieve and you always fail?
1 person likes this
@responsiveme (22926)
• India
28 Sep 18
Condolences on your loss. I can understand the things piling up and things to be seen too. It's two months today that I lost my father...Life has changed after that. Do get your adequate rest as otherwise exhausation up on you