Question about Facebook friend requests

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Eugene, Oregon
September 28, 2018 6:49pm CST
I have some FB friends on myLot and that is fine. Some friends on that site are people I have met on some of the film sets I have worked on. I don't spend a lot of time there. It is mainly where I keep up with calls for extras on a few actor sites in Portland and I need it for that. But, a new next door neighbor, whom I know pretty well since she is one of the ping pong regulars where we live sent me a friend request a week or so ago. Then, today, a guy I used to work for sent me one. I like him alright, but we have zero in common really. He is into riding quads on sand dunes and antique cars, nothing that I have any interest in. That neighbor request, I have let sit without responding now, though I see that person two or three times a week at ping pong. My old boss, i never see unless I run into him at a store, where we have have a boring conversation. The guy has a good time being rude and loves to tell stories about that. I really don't want to read FB posts from these people or have them read mine, which are sometimes quite political. So, do I just ignore the requests and hope they go away or refuse them? Do any of you ever have this problem? Note: I saw today that 50 million FB members had their info hacked. That is another mess.
20 people like this
19 responses
@moffittjc (118219)
• Gainesville, Florida
29 Sep 18
I probably have a dozen or so FB friend requests sitting in my notifications right now. I'm barely ever on FB, so I don't see the need to continue to add more "friends" to the list. Every now and then I'll feel generous and go through and accept a bunch of them, but that only happens maybe once a year.
5 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
@moffittjc I usually just let them sit. I will with these two and some others as well. I really don't want to add any unless it is for acting network.
3 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
13 Oct 18
@enlightenedpsych2 I know those duplicate friend requests are happening a lot. FB has some real problems, it seems.
@ramapo17 (30457)
• Melbourne, Florida
29 Sep 18
I am sure you don't have enough time in the day to spend on FB.
2 people like this
@Starmaiden (9311)
• Canada
29 Sep 18
You don't have to accept all friend requests. I don't. If the person lives in the neighborhood, I can visit them in person, or vice versa if our relationship is friendly. Having them on facebook also defeats the purpose of having neighbors you can visit. I wouldn't accept a friend request from someone I know but don't find interesting.
4 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Oh I definitely don't accept all. But with a next door neighbor, I will just let it sit I think.
2 people like this
@peavey (16936)
• United States
28 Sep 18
If you feel like you should "friend" them, you can, and then when they post, look in the upper right of their post and there is a place where you can hide all their posts. I have done that and it keeps everyone happy because they don't know. If there's a time when you need to read a post, you can always go to their page.
3 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Not a bad idea really!
3 people like this
@JudyEv (323673)
• Rockingham, Australia
30 Sep 18
That's a brilliant idea.
2 people like this
@ramapo17 (30457)
• Melbourne, Florida
1 Oct 18
I never noticed that.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (214294)
• Chile
28 Sep 18
I don´t accept any requests except for those belonging to the friends I talk to by the phone and see often.
3 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
That is best I think.
3 people like this
@marguicha (214294)
• Chile
29 Sep 18
@JamesHxstatic Even here, I follow people after I have read and answered many posts.
3 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
@marguicha I sometimes follow on impulse I guess.
3 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (48855)
• United States
28 Sep 18
I saw that on the news tonight. Don't stress about the Facebook thing. Don't add anyone unless you want to.
3 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Yes, that is the best way.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (323673)
• Rockingham, Australia
29 Sep 18
I know virtually zilch about FB but I have an account. I have four friends I think. I look occasionally now as Vince and another friend will be posting photos from their respective holidays and I think it is the only way I'll see them.
2 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
It is now really just for the acting groups and notices that get posted there. I do have a couple of old friends from army days there too. The rest, I barely notice.
2 people like this
@ramapo17 (30457)
• Melbourne, Florida
1 Oct 18
I usually only use facebook to post things about the grandson. Anything personal I use my inbox on yahoo.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (323673)
• Rockingham, Australia
30 Sep 18
@JamesHxstatic I guess it has its uses but there is a fair bit of 'bad' about it too I think.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
29 Sep 18
If you do not want to be annoyed, ignore the requests, go to your settings and set that only "friends of friends" (or if you prefer only "friends") can see your profile.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
29 Sep 18
@JamesHxstatic I would ignore, they may think you do not use your account.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
I will just ignore I think. It is a bit awkward with next door neighbor.
1 person likes this
@ramapo17 (30457)
• Melbourne, Florida
29 Sep 18
I also saw that about facebook and my husband warned me against answering any friend requests. I do not go on there often and usually only when my daughter posts a picture of my grandchildren. After being on here and playing some games, I do not get into anything else.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
It is best to limit use of FB, I agree and use it mostly for the acting groups and notices posted there.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (39965)
• Laguna Woods, California
2 Oct 18
@JamesHxstatic - Just ignore the requests. The other choice is to friend them and then, in your settings, choose not to follow them. Then, you will not see their posts. If you don't want them to see your posts, whenever you post something you can choose the option of "Only friends, except ...." Then, you list the people who will NOT see your posts. I have some relatives whom I have done that with. I let them become friends, because I do not what to hurt their feelings, but I do not follow what they post and they cannot see what I post. Very simple!
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
2 Oct 18
I like that idea! Thanks Deborah!
1 person likes this
• Laguna Woods, California
3 Oct 18
@JamesHxstatic - I'm glad you liked that. I hope it works as well for you as it has for me!
1 person likes this
@andriaperry (116876)
• Anniston, Alabama
29 Sep 18
NOOOO! I did that once and it was a nightmare. No neighbors, however, one just around the bend here I keep, but we have nothing in common. I do so because she thinks she can walk all over me, when it gets tense, I make a post letting "everyone" know someone is in my space and needs to back off. It works. Now its just online friends and a couple people I keep in touch with in town. If asked " say, I am sorry, I have so many I have not taken time to look through all of them."
2 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
I think I will just let them sit as you say.
1 person likes this
@db20747 (43406)
• Washington, District Of Columbia
2 Oct 18
I would just wait and hope it goes away!! If they ask why make a truthful excuse like I'm not facebook that much!!! If U refuse and U see them everyday that won't be 2 good!! They will be asking why U denied their request!!
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
10 Oct 18
Yes, they will just sit until they go away I think.
1 person likes this
@Janet357 (75678)
29 Sep 18
I have the same feeling. Also if fb will be used for checking one’s activity, where they go, eat, buy and so on, it’s a waste of time. I actually deleted my friends on fb not because of anything but their msgs distracts me when i interview applicants.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Yes, I really only use it for my acting groups and a few old friends who live elsewhere.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
30 Sep 18
@Janet357 I live near Portland, Oregon and there are a lot of TV and movies filmed there, so many extras are used. I do that as often as possible, just a retirement hobby that pays when it happens. I have written some about it.
1 person likes this
@Janet357 (75678)
30 Sep 18
@JamesHxstatic acting groups? You meant you are actor?
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35042)
• Philippines
29 Sep 18
You always have the choice not to accept. I don't when I don't want to.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
I see my neighbor too often at ping pong to reject her so I will just let it sit.
@NormanDarlo (1071)
• Ireland
9 Oct 18
I haven't read through all the responses, so apologies in advance if I'm repeating stuff. It can be a tricky conundrum when someone sends a FB friend request, if you have nothing in common but you don't want to offend by rejection. The solution I've used sometimes is to accept the friend request, but add the person to the 'restricted' group (see image above). The effect of this is that they will only be able to see your public posts; anything you post as 'friends only' will be invisible to them. Plus they don't know you have restricted them. Additionally, if you don't want to read their posts, just unfollow them. Well, it works for me
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
10 Oct 18
I rarely post to friends only and don't post much that does not deal with my acting groups, so I will just let the requests it I guess.
1 person likes this
@PatZAnthony (14752)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
19 Oct 18
Many of the things on Facebook we overlook. We are there to connect with a few and rest we don't know! No more friends for me unless they are on a site I belong to now.
@jaboUK (64363)
• United Kingdom
29 Sep 18
I always ignore requests, I don't use facebook much anyway. I only want real friends or family on my list.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Yes, the best way I think, but I need it for those acting notices too, so need to check those almost daily.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (57305)
• Centralia, Washington
29 Sep 18
Thanks to the era of The Toad I have less friends on Facebook.
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
Yes, I lost a few due to that Big Orange Mistake too.
1 person likes this
• Bournemouth, England
29 Sep 18
Change your FB settings to private and tell those people you don't bother much with FB nowadays. A lot of people seem to do this!
1 person likes this
• Eugene, Oregon
29 Sep 18
I may do that as well.
1 person likes this
@sunrisefan (28650)
• Philippines
15 Oct 18
Lately I don't accept friend requests even if they are my relatives or friends because there are many hackers who pretend to be your relative or friend.