Wise words - neither a lender nor a borrower be

@JudyEv (325345)

Rockingham, Australia

December 13, 2018 7:52am CST

When you borrow something, do you take better care of it than if it were your own? We do and it is disappointing when friends borrow from us and are careless with our items. Today an associate borrowed our car-trailer. Vince left the guy to hook up the trailer while he went to fetch something. They checked the lights and the friend drove away. Ten minutes later he was back at the door. Halfway down our drive the trailer had bounced off the tow-hitch and headed for the bush. It hadn’t been hooked on properly. Then, while trying to turn his car, it bellied out in some sand so he had to walk back to the house. He hadn’t bothered to attach the safety chains between the trailer and car but thought that was a lucky thing as the trailer might have run into the back of his car. He failed to realise that if the trailer had detached itself on the highway it could have easily smashed into someone else. Luckily no damage had been done to the cables connecting the lights but how stupid! This guy isn’t really a close friend but is even less so now. It’s bad enough if it’s your own property but you’d expect someone to be extra careful when borrowing items. PHoto of the car-trailer behind the bus with my Hyundai Excel on board.

37 people like this

38 responses

@DianneN (246334)

• United States

13 Dec 18

How aggravating for you. At least no one was hurt. Friends like that we do not need. We went through something similar with our soon to be ex-neighbor, Dr. Jay. My husband had our car checked out totally today, and thank goodness nothing else was wrong with it.

7 people like this

show previous comments

@DianneN (246334)

• United States

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv I agree!!!

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

It's so rude and inconsiderate not to take good care when it isn't yours.

2 people like this

@Hannihar (129379)

• Israel

17 Dec 18

@DianneN Wise of your husband to have the car checked. I would too. He is really a jerk your ex-heighbor. This guy above me is no friend. He is a jerk that lives above us causing us trouble. I do not like him at all. He is nasty.

2 people like this

Show more comments

@Marilynda1225 (79592)

• United States

13 Dec 18

As you said, things could have been far worse but even the mishap in itself was enough to make you realize that this guy didn't know what he was doing. Did he get it all hooked back up and continued with your trailer or did you send him on his way without the trailer?

5 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

13 Dec 18

He tows things all the time so he should have known. He is just one of those slap-happy people that don't bother doing things properly.

2 people like this

@allknowing (130067)

• India

13 Dec 18

I don't suppose he will have the courage to ask for it again another time

2 people like this

show previous comments

@allknowing (130067)

• India

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv Clever thought

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

I don't think he will have any compunction at all. He is that sort of guy. But next time we might have an urgent need for it ourselves and be unable to lend it.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@LadyDuck (457412)

• Switzerland

13 Dec 18

I am sorry Judy. I take care of things I borrow, just like you, better care if they were my own. Unfortunately a few things came back damaged, a book stained (HORROR!), now I give nothing to anyone.

2 people like this

show previous comments

@LadyDuck (457412)

• Switzerland

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv The difficult part is to find an excuse. For books we simply say NO, my husband shows how all our books are in mint conditions, we are collectors, so we care too much to lend our precious babies.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

I think that is the best way to be but sometimes it's a bit difficult to say no. We might think up a good excuse next time.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

@LadyDuck It can be hard to find an excuse especially when the borrower is a good friend.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@wolfgirl569 (94778)

• Marion, Ohio

13 Dec 18

The photo didnt show. We wont loan to my brother for that reason. He takes no care of borrowed stuff at all.

2 people like this

show previous comments

@wolfgirl569 (94778)

• Marion, Ohio

13 Dec 18

@JudyEv Yeaaa a photo.

Many people wont loan to him. I have very few people that I will let use my stuff anymore.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

13 Dec 18

It's very rude and inconsiderate isn't it? And it happens quite often even with good friends.

Show more comments

@Janet357 (75656)

•

14 Dec 18

You are right there. They dont care because it’s not their stuff. Such a bad attitude indeed, better not lend your stuff.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

Sometimes it is hard to say no but it is better not to lend if you can.

1 person likes this

@Janet357 (75656)

•

16 Dec 18

@JudyEv yes or choose the person you will lend your stuff to

1 person likes this

@AmbiePam (85298)

• United States

13 Dec 18

That drives me nuts. My dad always taught us to bring something back in the same condition, if not better. Borrow someone's car? Bring it back with a full tank of gas. Tear someone's book? Better buy them a new one. Yet most times in my life I get my things back in pitiful condition. It's disheartening.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

It is disheartening. I can never understand that people think it is okay to return things broken or damaged.

1 person likes this

@SIMPLYD (90722)

• Philippines

14 Dec 18

We never lend our car to anyone except for the brothers of my husband. But they are reminded by my husband to take care of it well, because if something bad happens to the car, he will be responaible for whatever damage he has accidentaly done to it.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

It isn't often anyone wants to borrow the car thank goodness. We would be very reluctant to lend such a valuable vehicle.

1 person likes this

Arthur Chappell

@arthurchappell (45002)

• Preston, England

13 Dec 18

hope you took the trailer back off him after that - he could have really injured someone

1 person likes this

show previous comments

Arthur Chappell

@arthurchappell (45002)

• Preston, England

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv hope he brings it back safely and pays for any needed repairs

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

No he went off to do whatever he had to do but at least he had the safety chains on. He could have killed someone. He should bring it back today. I don't think we'll be lending anything else to him.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

@arthurchappell There was no damage done thankfully but it could have been so much worse.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@cindiowens (5120)

• North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

13 Dec 18

I didn't see a photo, but yes people should take extra care and be very mindful of other people's belongings which they are using.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

13 Dec 18

I forgot about large photos not loading but I've fixed it now.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

@playertwo It is very annoying. And what if the trailer had careered across the highway and hit an oncoming car.

@Hannihar (129379)

• Israel

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv I hate when people borrow things and they let you know what they did to them while when you borrow you make sure you take good care. I wonder why there are those that do not care and those that care.

1 person likes this

show previous comments

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

17 Dec 18

@Hannihar That is a great shame.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

Maybe it is part of the upbringing and they've never been taught to respect someone else's property.

1 person likes this

@Hannihar (129379)

• Israel

16 Dec 18

@JudyEv This person is very selfish and terrible and I am the only one that sees it here and I will not let him rip down my stuff and get away with it. He causes us so much trouble.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@Icydoll (36717)

• India

13 Dec 18

I had few past experiences ,after that I stopped lending things .I hate when someone treat our things careless.

2 people like this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

It's hard to say 'no' to friends when they want to borrow things. I just expect people to take a bit extra care with things that don't belong to them but that doesn't happen.

@porwest (78761)

• United States

23 Dec 18

Egads. Yeah. That would seem to me to be a no brainer, but stupid is as stupid does of course. I'd be fit to be tied. But glad to hear that at least damages were nominal.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

26 Dec 18

Some people are so careless. It's okay if they want to be like that with their own stuff but they should really take more care with other people's belongings.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

2 Jan 19

@porwest I guess if they don't value their own possessions they won't value someone else's.

1 person likes this

@porwest (78761)

• United States

31 Dec 18

@JudyEv We used to tend to say to someone in the workplace, "take care of it like it's your own." And then you saw how some people took care of their own stuff and you were like, "Scratch that."

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@leny34 (8506)

• Sidoarjo, Indonesia

13 Dec 18

it looks like the things you say will get worse, with the accident you realize that what that person is doing doesn't know

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

He does know but he just didn't bother. He has smaller trailers that he tows all the time.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

@leny34 Hopefully he won't need it again. I'm not sure what we'd do. It is hard to say no to them.

1 person likes this

@leny34 (8506)

• Sidoarjo, Indonesia

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv so he will never use those big trailers again?

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@maximax8 (31053)

• United Kingdom

13 Dec 18

When I borrow something I take excellent care of it. Once I borrowed a personal stereo. I was enjoying listening to music and had a wonderful time. Then to my horror it stopped working. I went to an electrical shop and bought the same model of personal stereo. I gave the new personal stereo back to my friend. Always hook the trailer back he found out. I was in a coach one night and a door opened. Someone told the driver all the luggage had fallen on the ground. The driver had to go onto the road to pick up all the passengers luggage. It was going from Brisbane to Sydney.

1 person likes this

show previous comments

@maximax8 (31053)

• United Kingdom

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv In those days I had a backpack however must other people had a suitcase. Yes, a lot of the suitcases got damaged. These days it is my son's wheelchair that others don't look after. It fell off the roof of a taxi in Morocco. It was broken coming out of a taxi in Poland. Worst of all it got badly broken on an airline between India and Sri Lanka earlier this year. They broke the back of it and the left hand side handle.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

@maximax8 The broken wheelchair must have been so hard to replace in a foreign country - just knowing where to go to get one, etc.

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

Oh dear. The cases must have been damaged if they'd fallen out while the bus was moving.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@youless (112100)

• Guangzhou, China

17 Dec 18

This is why actually I don't like lending things but sometimes I understand it is difficult to say no. I seldom borrow things from others. If I have to do, I will use it very carefully in case of any damages.

1 person likes this

show previous comments

@youless (112100)

• Guangzhou, China

18 Dec 18

@JudyEv This is why I prefer to have my own rather than borrowing from others. There is still a pressure to borrow other's stuffs.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

17 Dec 18

That's good that you are careful. We are too but try not to borrow unless we really have to.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

18 Dec 18

@youless Yes, it can be tempting to borrow.

1 person likes this

@MALUSE (69416)

• Germany

13 Dec 18

That could have become a costly adventure! Btw, the photo doesn't show.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

13 Dec 18

Thanks, the photo was too large. I've fixed it now.

@MALUSE (69416)

• Germany

13 Dec 18

@JudyEv Gosh, what a vehicle! It seems as big as a train wagon. Have you ever driven it on serpentine roads in mountainous regions?

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

@MALUSE Haha. Are you kidding?

We would never take it to Ireland either!

@JamesHxstatic (29237)

• Eugene, Oregon

16 Dec 18

How awful! I hope that you did not retrieve it and then let him take it again. He is quite careless.

1 person likes this

show previous comments

@JamesHxstatic (29237)

• Eugene, Oregon

16 Dec 18

@JudyEv I suppose it would, but that is a worrisome friend.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

17 Dec 18

@JamesHxstatic He is one of the group that Vince plays golf with. We're friends but really only in the context of that group.

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

We did actually. It's a small community and he is more or less a friend so it would have been awkward not to.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@responsiveme (22926)

• India

14 Dec 18

It's the pits really. I think they need to be extra careful when borrowing things. The house looks do good...Wide open spaces

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

16 Dec 18

We are lucky to have such a lot of space here. We will really miss it when one day we are forced to move.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

17 Dec 18

@responsiveme We are hoping that too.

1 person likes this

@responsiveme (22926)

• India

16 Dec 18

@JudyEv I hope it won't be for a long long time.

1 person likes this

Show more comments

@Courage7 (19633)

• United States

14 Dec 18

Oh my Judy, such disrespect of borrowing your things like that. Lucky it even got back to you by the sounds of it.

1 person likes this

@JudyEv (325345)

• Rockingham, Australia

14 Dec 18

I was really cross. And we've just had huge problems with our caravan after having a couple stay in it. The problem was simple in the end. They turned a switch without turning it back and we had no end of trouble trying to work out the problem.

1 person likes this

@Courage7 (19633)

• United States

14 Dec 18

@JudyEv So sorry that happened to you sods.

1 person likes this