A Mylot Complaint (For Discussion)

United States
February 11, 2019 7:18am CST
GAA, if you happen to be reading this, I have no intention of making this into some sort of argument. I intend for this to be civilized. It's more of an observation and opinion than it is a complaint. One in which I would like feedback on from my fellow mylotters. Have you ever opened one of your own discussions and read through the responses? Most people who start discussions actually do enter into conversation with people in them. However, I have come across a few who make discussions and do not bother to interact with people. That's not what this is about. This is about the responses you get to those discussions. It's about thinking you've made a discussion worthy of discussing and yet finding the responses leaving more to be desired. This has happened to me a time or two, and I always wonder "why" Why respond if you can't think of anything to contribute to a conversation? No, there are exceptions. There are people who say very little but whom come off genuine, and not as if they are just throwing down a comment to throw down a comment. I realize that some discussions just fall flat. They don't receive the responses you would expect, and that's that. That's fine. However, there are those discussions that receive some good responses, but a few duds mixed within. Those are the type of responses I am really referring to. Last night I made a discussion about a quote that I had read. I liked the quote because the character who had thought it (as we were in their memories) was naive and unaware. I thought it would be conducive to conversations and interpretations... Anyway, I don't want to make this any longer than is necessary. TL;DR : Sometimes it's rather disheartening to find that a discussion you think should generate thoughtful responses, only seem to get the "I didn't really care to give a genuine comment so I'm slapping this here." type response. What are your thoughts? (TL:DR stands for Too Long ; Didn't Read) How do you feel when a discussion you've thought would be great ends up with responses that are lacking? How do you feel about those responses where the mylotter doesn't seem to have read the entirety of the discussion
29 people like this
29 responses
@just4him (303392)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
11 Feb 19
To be totally honest, I don't think about the responses I get from my discussions. If I get them, great. If they make sense, awesome. If they generate responses from other members who then discuss back and forth, again, it's great. If they give a response that's totally off the wall and nothing to do with the discussion or the question I asked at the end, then I know the person didn't read it or didn't care what he/she would respond. That I will admit does baffle me and leave me questioning the reason the person responded at all, but again, I don't worry about it.
6 people like this
@Janet357 (75678)
11 Feb 19
I agree, Even if people just like or say little, i dont mind, i still thank them. And i dont complain.
3 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I don't often care... however, when it is a discussion that I fee; should warrant more discussion within the responses? That is when I get irked. As you said, you are baffled when people respond in a way that leaves you knowing they had not read the discussion. That is what I am most referring to here. Well, part of what I am most referring to. You have to admit that there are times when you've written something you hope will invoke conversation, and are a little disappointed when that doesn't happen. @just4him
2 people like this
@just4him (303392)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
12 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum What I'm always surprised about is when a discussion I don't think will get a lot of discussion gets a lot. I really didn't think the discussion was that good or inspiring. My expectations are never high, so when I get a good response, I'm happy.
@snowy22315 (168401)
• United States
11 Feb 19
Honestly, I am usually just happy to get a response. Sometimes, they are offbase, but at least they tried.
5 people like this
@snowy22315 (168401)
• United States
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum Rotten lol...No snow though.
• United States
11 Feb 19
@snowy22315 Cold, damp and overcast here. The snow didn't fall, just stayed in the atmosphere. Pity!
• United States
11 Feb 19
If I am being completely honest, I was just rather upset when two or three people whose first language is English, gave me "Nice discussion" type responses. Sometimes I am fine with those types of responses, but not when I am really passionate about a discussion. I will get over it though. How's the weather this morning?
2 people like this
@1hopefulman (45125)
• Canada
11 Feb 19
Sometimes what we think is interesting, clever and informative is only that to us. Other people may have a different opinion than us. It's the way the world is.
3 people like this
@1hopefulman (45125)
• Canada
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum Discussions are a funny thing. Some that I thought would do well, didn't and some that I did not expect too much were popular. So I just post discussions as they come into my head and whatever happens, happens. I don't worry too much about it. Writing here is not my job, it is my pleasure!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I tried to infer that within my discussion here. I may not have done a good job of that as I let the passion of the moment write the discussion for me. If that makes sense. I will say that the discussion I am referring to (within this discussion) was one about a book. I know reading isn't everyone's "cuppa", but I figured enough people who did love to read would appreciate my discusson.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
@1hopefulman Personally, I've had to treat as more of a "job" lately. Or rather, as "coffee money". Normally this site is my cathasis.
1 person likes this
@FourWalls (61316)
• United States
11 Feb 19
I think sometimes we want to impose our feelings of how important the subject is onto others ("this is my life story I'm telling you here! How can you just say "nice of this" as a response??!"). I had an acquaintance (since dropped) on Facebook who said, "If you haven't commented about (the Pulse Nightclub Shooting) then I know how you REALLY feel." What am I supposed to say?!? It's like these old clips of news reporters interviewing people on the street after Kennedy's assassination: "What did you think about it?" What is someone supposed to say? Seriously, whether someone writes a three-hour thesis on what's wrong with a song I post, or just says (as someone just did), "Wow, I really love this!" it's okay with me. It doesn't bother me. I'm used to being ignored.
4 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I see your posts and rarely, if ever, respond because I know I don't often have anything of value to add to them. I guess I get irked at those who do not add value to what I have to say. I don't expect people to love everything I write (I do occupy the real world sometimes, albeit grudgingly) but when I am excited about it? I do get disappointed when I get dud responses. Most of the time I could care less, but there's usually one discussion out of 100 where I am hoping for valuable responses.
@sofssu (23662)
11 Feb 19
If you start a discussion that requires too much thought people do not respond. Or they say something totally absurd as I found today in one of my recent posts. I just laugh it off. People sometimes do not take the trouble to read short posts too, they just write something and leave. However, I am curious about those that write discussions and never respond to what people have to say ..why do they even bother to post? Well we are paid for interaction not just for posting. Some genuinely have issues with understanding stuff, I am okay with them too. It takes all kinds I guess.
3 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
It does take all kinds. We are also from a lot of different parts of the world. I know that English isn't the first language of a lot of folks here, I take that into consideration. Those that make discussions and do not comment on their responses? I think they do not understand that it takes interaction here to make any kind of money. Also, people are not going to respond to you if you don't comment back to them. I usually do just shake my head and let it go, but sometimes I make a discussion and feel rather irked when I get comments that fall short. Especially if I know the commenter has a good grasp of the English language. It leaves me shaking my head and asking "why respond?"
@Courtlynn (67002)
• United States
11 Feb 19
I'm with Valerie. I don't worry about them. As long as they're not rude, anyways.
3 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I only get upset when it's a discussion I think deserves more than just a half hearted answer. Especially if I feel as if the person hasn't even read my discussion. It used to be why I would make tricky titltes to "catch them out".
1 person likes this
• Rupert, Idaho
11 Feb 19
Same here, I agree with what Valerie is saying too!
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31367)
• Denmark
11 Feb 19
I usually have the opposite problem. When people ask me a question I could answer with 6 words I tend to write 6 paragraphs about it I understand what you mean. Sometimes I read a response and think "It was nice of you to stop by...but is that really all you have to say" Sometimes even a short response can turn into a conversation, and I try to ask people questions if they don't say much, but it is a lot easier to continue the conversation if people write longer responses.
2 people like this
@Porcospino (31367)
• Denmark
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum "Nice quote" is hard to comment on. I guess I could say "I also think that it is a nice quote and I like it because..." but I don't want to hear myself talk (write) all the time. I prefer a conversation where we both say more than two words. Some members are very good at that, and it is easy to have a good conversation with them because we both keep the conversation alive. Sometimes I am not sure what people want to say because their responses are so short. For instanse someone wrote: "I agree" as an response and my first thought was: "What do you agree with?" I wrote many things when I started the discussion and I didn't know what they were refering to. The old discussions about urban legends should still be there, but I think they are older than 2015. I wrote them in the old myLot as far as I remember. Maybe I will write some new discussions about urban legends. A few days ago I read some urban legends on Snopes, but there are so many good ones, and I not sure which ones to choose.
• United States
11 Feb 19
@Porcospino I will comment backwards. You know that I would respond to any discussions you make on urban legends as I like that sort of thing. Yes, there is a member here that I am not sure what to think of. His name is Wise Ghost. He makes me think of the old troll that used to come here and would use words like "wise wizard". I didn't respond to him for about a week or two because of this. I wasn't sure if it was the same person, and since that troll had irked me, I didn't want to entertain him even if he had become docile. Yes, those people who write "I agree" when you've written several things especially irks me. There is a lady here who has said she'd like to earn more here but she doesnt' do anything to help herself with that. Her discussions are all about books wherein she gives the plot away. I respond to them knowing I will never read any of the books she talks about, why would I? She's given away the plot. She's a very nice lady though, and so I respond to her to help her out. I am sometimes able to carry on a conversation, but not always. I think I've commented back to you on everythng.. Hmm.. My wrist has been hurting for about a week now. I have to ice it every once in awhile, which helps. I am thinking it must be because I am typing so much.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
Yes, it is so disheartening sometimes. Especially when a person writes a short response that isn't conducive to a conversation. I don't mind short responses, I don't mind long ones. I just want someone to say something that would continue a conversation. To use an example from the discussion I am referring to here. I wrote a discussion about a quote. For those who do not read books, they could have said "Oh I do like that quote, I'm not much of a reader but I'm glad you could find such an awesome quote." Instead I got "Nice quote" as a response. I can't say anything to "nice quote", not really. I could have said plenty to the "Oh I do like that quote" kind of response. I like to ask questions in comments as well. It helps keep the conversation going. I was thinking about your discussions on urban legends again today. I may have to take a peak through your discussions again and see if I can find one.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130088)
• India
11 Feb 19
It hurts when a discussion which we think would get reactions end up with one or two words responses .
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
It is rather more annoying when those who do respond in that manner are those whom we know have a good grasp of the English Language.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130088)
• India
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum It has nothing to do with the language but whose discussion you are responding to. My passion is photography I had posted a sunrise photo - a real good photo right from my garden. There was another photo and I know in comparison it was not much. I got 5 responses and they got 60
• United States
11 Feb 19
@allknowing I have to respectfully disagree, or well differ in opinion. I do agree that sometimes it's about who wrote the discussion. Sometimes, however, it is about the English Language. I've witnessed Americans (whom may have varying ethnicities, but whom have a good grasp of the English language) comment or respond in a dull manner. It irks me I suppose, and I probably hold them to a higher standard then I should. Not out of a sense of patriotism as I may have inferred, but because these people have also been on mylot for a long time and should "know better" in my opinion. At the end of the day, my opinion doesn't much matter and these people are going to continue doing what they have the right to do.
1 person likes this
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
11 Feb 19
I definitely try to respond back there are some they leave me with nothing in which for me o say anything back so I leave those and move one to the next. I like trying to keep it rolling if I can. I agree there is not point in making a discussion if your not going to try to interact with those that are coming by and saything things. I do get a little ticket if one person go through all my post and comments on every single one of each person responses.
1 person likes this
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum yes, I don’t like it either. I had someone doing that over the weekend and it irritates me. Normally it’s someone that is new. It doesn’t bother me if someone is taking to jsut one or two peopel because they want to continue talking about whatever it is.
• United States
11 Feb 19
I don't like when someone goes through my responses and comments on every single one or most of them. I don't mind if it's one or two, and if it keeps a conversation going. I've talked to people who have commented under every single one of my responses on a discussion and told me that they needed to stop, that it wasn't really earning them anything. That the interaction has to be genuine.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (48225)
• Canada
11 Feb 19
When members respond with a comment that doesn't make a lot of sense, sometimes I take into consideration that they may not have understood it, if English is not their first learned language. As of late, when that happens, I will not like the comment, just to kind of give them the hint. On one occasion I actually replied that the comment wasn't something good as they indicated it was. They didn't understand and thanked me for clarification. In the end I think that we all need to be very sensitive to our readers but also to what they comment back. We will not always get the reactions that we expected.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
When I made this discussion, the commenters / responsders I had in mind are all American. They may have differing nationalities, but their competence in the English language is apparent by their own discussions. I do give the benefit of the doubt to those whose first language is not english. I often clarify or ask for clarification.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
@Juliaacv Let me clarify as I didn't mean to infer anything. I welcome responses from everyone who wants to respond. Whether they are in America, Canada, UK, Switzerland, Africa, Germany etc etc etc. I was referring to responses made by members in America, yes. I was just disappointed to see that they didn't give me much to comment back with. They didn't seem to have read the discussion itself. It's also that they've been on this site a long time and no that interaction is key. Not only for those who use the site to make money (which I will admit to using for the time being, though most of the time it's just a fun place to be for me), but for those who use the site as a means to waste some free time.
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (48225)
• Canada
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum In all fairness, shouldn't all discussions be open to all members? Or are you speaking to some American members in specific?
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
11 Feb 19
Some people do not like to respond to discussions they judge "difficult", they prefer to comment nothing or to be very concise just to show that they appreciated and commented. I notice that many times people do not read the entire discussion, most of the time, the first couple of lines and the end.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
@LadyDuck Yes, I have often wondered why he hasn't done a better job with it. He's been on this site forever. However, I do think he's mentioned he has some mental difficulties because of an accident. I know he tries and I give him that.
1 person likes this
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum He speaks a bit of English, but he does not master the language very well. I know who is the one you mention.
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum He has mental problems, but not caused by an accident.
@Morleyhunt (21585)
• Canada
11 Feb 19
I've found I get the best responses form the "dumbest" discussions. The one I threw out there just because, not because I really had anything to say. The discussion I posted that I thought was worthwhile might have been ignored. I'm not sure why, but I've accepted it.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I understand your frustration. Me personally, I like when folks interact with me even if they respond with very few words. With so many folks from all over the world here, I am aware that different cultures may respond to discussions differently. I actually like this site better than fb because people will interact. They don't have to say much, but if they even take notice at a discussion I posted, In a happy camper. But as you can see... I love to write so Sometimes my responses can be a bit long... Lol!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I prefer long responses to be honest with you. I know there are so many people here from all over the world. I've interacted better with people whose first language isn't English than I have with those whose first language is English and who I have been interacting with for years. I just got disheartened when I saw a few responses that I really could not expand on.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 19
@ScribbledAdNauseum It happens sometimes. Heck, I don't get as many responses as I would like but I am happy with what I do get. I am still in search of a topic that will generate many conversations. You are doing quite well with this one. Lol! Keep smiling and don't let anything get you down.
@dya80dya (33058)
11 Feb 19
I feel disappointed and I understand that some people are here only for money. Many people don't read discussions. Or they give useless answers.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Feb 19
I am here for money, but I am also here for conversation. I know that conversation makes money here. I guess I was just very disheartened when I came on to find that my discussion had more bland responses than it did interesting ones.
@maezee (42003)
• United States
11 Feb 19
Haha. This happens to me quite a bit. And sometimes the most generic ones end up being the most popular! Such is life, I guess.
1 person likes this
@Tina30219 (81441)
• Onaway, Michigan
11 Feb 19
I feel bad if a discussion I posted ends up with lacking responses as for the responders responding and not reading the whole discussion I think it sucks.
1 person likes this
@Missmwngi (12927)
• Nairobi, Kenya
11 Feb 19
I like to just appreciate the responses i receive no matter what. Sometimes i understand having to jungle between online and offline is hectic
1 person likes this
@WiseGhots (14607)
11 Feb 19
Great point for a discussion.
• United States
11 Feb 19
Well I certainly thought so, though I let my passion of the moment do the typing for me.
1 person likes this
@WiseGhots (14607)
11 Feb 19
1 person likes this
@Nana49 (3402)
• United States
11 Feb 19
I read and respond as to how that post makes me feel Sometimes i have short thoughts on the subject sometimes longer ones.. I try to respond to all my post in the same way .. As well ..
1 person likes this
• San Dimas, California
11 Feb 19
I like engaging in discussions. I don't expect people to continuously respond, mostly so far there has been excellent contributions to my discussions. I try to respond to every response, if I have time, if not I will come back later. Some people get busy too.
1 person likes this