Out of control 10 y/o????HELP!!!!

United States
September 13, 2006 8:53pm CST
My 10 y/o is out of control. I found a myspace page she started with pictures of her in her bra!!!! she has absolutley no respect for me and does whatever she wants. Short of strangling her....what can I do???
15 responses
• United States
14 Sep 06
I'd start by taking the internet and telephone away from her. There are some terribly sick individuals out there & you must protect your daughter at all costs. If she yells, screams, etc who cares--you are providing a place to sleep and food for her. You are under no obligation to provide electronic equipment to her that she doesn't appreciate anyway. I would put my foot down & give her absolutely no wiggle room. She would have to earn even the ability to call a friend. If she can't talk respectfully to you, then she can't talk to her friends. I have also found with my own experience, that some soap in my 9 year olds mouth does wonders to a snotty attitude.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Sep 06
There was a fantastic show on the other night. Diane Sawyer did a piece on teenagers and the internet. One of the most interesting statements that was made was, "A lot of times they get carried away because they aren't aware who is on the other end." Two of the suggestions they had were to: (1) Always have the computer in a centralized location in the home (ex: living room) (2) Know who your kids are talking to Since I am a parent also, and know that number 2 is not always possible. I'd resort to MY number 3. What about putting password protection on the computer? Even better, what about a child watch security program that allows her to use the site, but not upload. The problem is, in their mind everyone else is doing it...it's cool. One more thing. My husband is in the education field and has attended many seminars on the "Myspace factor". Did you know that employers are now conducting Myspace searches on their prospective candidates for hire. Something you might consider passing on to your daughter... Good luck! Trust me...you are not alone on this...
@officer13 (186)
• United States
20 Sep 06
MILITARY PUNISHMENT, MAKE HER RUN, PUSH-UPS, SIT-UPS, JUMPING JACK, LAPS AROUND THE POOL. SHE WILL LEARN, TRUST ME.
• United States
20 Sep 06
I have experience with this soley because my cousins are teenagers. I wouldn't go to extreme! I would start by setting up your own my space account, inviting your daughter as a friend, but don't let her know it is you and tracking her. If you dn't then every chance she gets she will be sneaky. If she does come in contact with someone atleast you'll have some what of a clue what and where they been upto. You don't want it being done begind your back. Just some advise when you kids friends post bulletins you can read them. Stay close don't make them want to push you away. It works well with my ten year old stp daughter
@AndreaM76 (1164)
• United States
19 Sep 06
10 years she is still a child. She is not really mentally equipped to know her full dangers. Do research on girls her age that has disapeared from online predators and scare her, inform close friends of family you can trust to spy on her. If she is using MS she might have other websites similar. God Bless I'll pray she will understand her danger!
@angelia (136)
• United States
17 Sep 06
chiggerdog is correct the first thing you need to do is take the pics of her in her bra off myspace check other sites also to make sure that she doesn't have a profile if she does make sure it is a site for a 10 yr old if you don't think she needs to be on there be sure to take her off..then you take everything she has out of her room and leave her nothing in there but her clothes if she has a door to her room take it off the hinges if you have to. Don't give her anything make her earn everything back. No friends over until she can show you respect once she starts showing you respect then give her things back one at at time. Make sure that once she has all her things back you put the computer in a location where you can see her at all times. It's ok to have a myspace page but make sure it secure..if you have to scare her and take her to the morge or the police station and have someone else talk to her you do what you have to do there are so many men even women that pray on young kids don't be scared that she's going to hate you she will love you in the end when you save her live..you do what you have to do remember she is 10 and you are the MOM don't let her run over you or anyone else...
• United States
15 Sep 06
Is the only thing she has done is post bad pictures on myspace? If so, you are making her out to be a very horrible kid, and shes not. Shes just doing what she thinks will make her more popular, bc the other girls out there are doing it. What you need to do, is sit her down adn TALK with her. No yelling, no screaming. Listen to what she has to say, and she will listen back to you. Maybe there is something else in her life that is bother her. Tell how she has to take the pictures down, and how dangerious it is. You can even show her the dateline specials.. theres one about preditors on myspace, and then theres how to catch a preditor. If you just yell and scream and take stuff away from her, she is just going to act out more. Treat her like an adult.. likeyou wanted to be treated at that age...
• India
15 Sep 06
pal a 10 yr child needs a total love frm thier parents. i dont say u dont love ur daughter. i mean to say is spent as much time u can and with patience understand her and her needs, be like a close friend , what does she want? i hope if its mother then it would be better bcoz gals genrelly tend towards thier mom, make sure tat ur internet connection is under ur control, be an administrator and dont let her access to all the useless junk in the world.. instal some spyware and it will help u to keep an eye on wat ur child is doing.. make her aware of the outer world and ya indulge her in some work, dont let her be alone thatz the time when all the junk thoughts come into the mind and make sure tat her friends are good and trustable..take their help and make ur daughter a better child hope this will help u
• Australia
15 Sep 06
I would reccomend showing her places and people who arent as fortunate as herself.I remember my lil sister in law going through the same thing when she was younger.Her parents took her to the phillipines and showed her all the poor relos that are there and when she came back she was a totally different person.Im not saying take her to the phills but if you could try something similar she will be more appreciative towards you and the freedoms she has.Or else send her to live with someone who wont take her attitude.
@chalmette69 (3010)
• United States
14 Sep 06
I also have a ten year old and I think the best thing is make the internet unavaliable to her, I think I would be very angrey at my child, but maybe you can sit her down and explain who will be looking at her on myspace, I mean there are so many perverts. Tell her exactly what could happen. Maybe then she will realize she made a terrible mistake. I want to strangle mine all the time, but I usually try talking to her and if that doesn't work take the things she loves the most away. Good Luck!
@heysimmi (451)
• India
14 Sep 06
Hi, most people here have given very good responses and I think depriving her of things like computer and phone would definitely help.All the best.
• India
14 Sep 06
Better to talk to her slowly and calmly without shouting. She may understand. Try to indulge her insome work so that she will be busy in that work doesnot have time to do other activities.
@ebberts (786)
• United States
14 Sep 06
As well as taking things away and putting a block on the computer if and when you decide to give it back. Her friends may as well be a problem. Check them out. Did she come up with these ideas herself or did she have help from her friends. I would talk to the parents of her friends and let them know what is going on. Their children may also be at risk. We had to stop our son from hanging around one of his friends because we caught them at a party and they had been drinking. I took the boy home and talked to his dad. I call the police but the party had broke up before they got there, the other boys dad was a friend of the woman who gave the party and he told her what I was going to do. I couldn't believe he did that. The police came and I told them what had happened they gave my son a breath test, and told him if it happened again they would take him to jail. I hoped this would scare him enough that he wouldn't do it again. So far so good. My son is a good boy, but sometimes friends have more influence over them than you do. Being parents is a hard job, and kids don't come with a manual. We do the best we can and Pray. Good Luck and God Bless.
@TJKMFK (54)
• United States
14 Sep 06
Strip her room down to nothing but a matress and blanket. Make her earn everything back. I know it sounds harsh, but what she's doing is dangerous. Always follow through with what you say you are going to do. If you tell her she's getting punishment a for action b then make sure you give her punishment a.
@missyann73 (1457)
• United States
14 Sep 06
#ONE take everything away from her, phone, computer, TV and allowance. Have her earn her items back, but put a block on the computer, so you can control what she brings up. Remember you are the parent, not the other way around