Does being a cop mean you deserve more respect then the average person?

United States
December 4, 2006 9:13am CST
Yesterday we were out doing some shopping. We were getting into the car after going to Target and my husband accidentally tapped the car next to us with his door getting in. There was about 12" of clearance between the two vehicles. I wouldn't have even fit between the cars, let along been able to squeeze in the door. The guy in the car got all bent out of shape. He rolled his window down and yelled at my husband who said he was sorry, he didn't mean to hit the car. But the guy wouldn't leave it alone. He got ticked that my husband still got in the car and was ready to drive off. He told him to wait and my husband was like, " there is no damage" which is what I was thinking. What is the big freaking deal. Meanwhile the kids are whining because they are tired and I had to use the bathroom. So he gets out and calls my husband a liar because there is a scratch on his car. Oooh, a tiny scratch. I was waiting for him to demand to exchange insurance info for a tiny scratch. Heck, I got backed into in a parking lot and it tore a bunch or paint off the bumper but I didn't lose my cool. Then he goes on to tell my husband that he is an off duty cop, like that is supposed to mean something. I was just sitting there thinking, well good for you, buddy, I'm a mom of 4. Finally he let us go but told my husband he was rude for not apologizing (which my husband had done already, twice). He acted all high and mighty because he was a cop. I thought he was very rude. Yes we dinged his car, but it wasn't a federal case or anything. It isn't like we took a huge chunk out or dented it. It was a tiny scratch and he had to bend down and look close to find it. He could have just said you dented it and accepted my husband's apology, or at least not have been so rude about it. I was disgusted that he thought he deserved more respect then we did just because he was a cop. What do you think?
2 people like this
28 responses
• United States
4 Dec 06
I have a lot of officer freinds, they are down to earth. But i do know alot who do think they are above the law, and they are not, they may feel like they are becuase we live in a small town and can pull alot of strings.. which is unfair but in any other town... they wouldnt matter to anyone you know? it's like a little man complext short guy buys a big truck... kinda thing,,
• United States
5 Dec 06
No thanks honey--try sticking to the topic and not spamming everyone.
@spcbrass (1192)
• United States
5 Dec 06
I had a similar incident happen to me in a McDonalds parking lot about 6 years ago. I came out and got in my car shortly after an undercover officer pulled in to the spot next to me. When I saw the car pull up I thought well great how am I going to get into my car. He left about 12 inches on one side and about 3 feet on the drivers side. When I got in I tapped his car and he made the same kind of scene in the parking lot. His car was dark blue and mine red, and you could see no visible damage. Of course I apologized. I even offered to exchange insurance information if it was that big of a deal to him. Finally we both got in our cars and left, no damage, no claims made. Until 2 days later when I get a call from my insurance company about a hit and run that I was involved in at a McDonalds parking lot. He took down my tag number and got all of my information that way and reported me to my insurance company. I fought that back and forth for about 3 months. Although he eventually dropped the claim it was still on my insurance record when I had to renew and wouldn't you know it. A rate increase. I am still miffed about it to this day. Luckily I don't work in that part of town anymore and hopefully that officer will do something really worng one day and be out of a job.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
That is just all kind of wrong. I can't believe some people are that horrid. I was worried about something similar happening to us. Some people are just so full of themselves.
@spcbrass (1192)
• United States
5 Dec 06
Some people when they get positions of power or respect will abuse that power. In this case it happened like that. However I am a firm believer that everyone gets what is coming to them. That is why when someone is rude or arrogant I can deal with them, because their day is coming.
1 person likes this
@jillbeth (2711)
• United States
5 Dec 06
We should respect the uniform and what it stands for, we don't necessarily have to respect the person wearing it. Respect must be earned, not demanded, no matter who you are or what your profession is. In the past, police officers were considered friends and public servants, here to serve and protect us, not to hassle us with their power trips. I'm sure there are still a lot of good cops out there, but it's the ones who are a**holes who get the attention and give the rest of them a bad name.
• United States
5 Dec 06
I agree. My friend's father was a cop when we were growing up and the stories by brother would tell me about what this guy talked about. About hassling minorities just because he could and how he hated them all. He was a big time racist working in the projects. Great combo. He was also a drunk and a jerk. Now both his boys are cops and aren't any better because that is what they learned growing up.
@claire87 (131)
• Australia
5 Dec 06
Cops are just as bad, anoying, agressive and disrespectful as the next person. They shouldnt be treated any differently just because of their career choice!
• United States
5 Dec 06
That is true. People, no matter what their job can be just as disrespectful as the next guy. If he had been in uniform I might have had more respect for him at first but the minute he opened his mouth I would have lost it because of his rudeness.
@Mahindan (564)
• Canada
5 Dec 06
I have friends who are in the police force and i would be joining them soon, but none of my friends have ever been rude to the the public nor have they flashed their badges when off duty. I am sorry to hear you were treated like that by a cop. I know there are cops who are always on the power trip and cause a lot of trouble. Some cops don't get it in their head, that they are public servants and they should watch what they are doing. It doesn't matter if he was a cop or not, he should change his attitude big time.
• United States
5 Dec 06
That is true. I hadn't even thought about the fact that, we as citizens, pay his salary so really he works for us. Too bad he has so much power as a police officer that the people that pay him are afraid of him, you know?
@emarie (5455)
• United States
5 Dec 06
well, that story was fun to read. did he say sorry as soon as he hit the car or after he got out?? well..maybe the other guy was just having a pissy day...some people get like that. it shouldn't matter if he's an off duty officer...big whoops...off duty means your a normal person..like anyone else...your husband didn't break the law and he can not makes a citizens arrest...but at least nothing big became of it...
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
He apologized after the cop told him he hit the car. That is how soft it was. He hadn't even realized he had hit it hard enough to damage it until the cop made a big deal about it. He rolled down his window and said in a very loud voice "hey, you just hit my car." My husband looked at his door then apologized. Afterwards I thought about it and for all I know the scratch was caused by our son. He gets in from the driver's side (his carseat is behind the driver in our minivan but there is no sliding door on his side). He might have scratched the car getting in--he's only 5. So my husband might not have hit the car hard enough to leave a mark but the mark was already there so I said nothing. It was still our fault.
@NewHeart (528)
• Canada
5 Dec 06
sorry know how you felt for sure had it happen to my wife oh must be 25 years back now so can laugh about it.lol hope he's not still out there cause i'll tell you all about it sounds like your husband needs a laugh. when wife went to get out of car was a sudden gust of wind man did that door open quick on a 73 sebring left a scratch and a blue mark from blue paint my car on a brand new 78 caddy well driver was just coming to car at the time he was a doctor man should have heard the mouth on him lol so i says sorry the wind caught the door as the wife was getting out with baby in her arms well it don't matter the reason he,s gonna have his say about it well sorry i says but he had me pissed now with the crowd around now so i says if i could clean his door off right now and really make it look good would he forget it and so he says ok dumb fool he was. i went to my trunk got a clean rag out always carry one lol got some cleaner out of a can i was carrying and i cleaned his door off i mean the whole door an he was now really happy the door was really shining just like new so he said it was now ok and was leaving.i then told wife get back in car we were leaving town now she says why i says get in were leaving now so she did now i says too her i cleaned his door alright but i used paint thinners from body shop i was at.lol anyone want to guess what happened after 15 minutes to that car door lol. we were travelling at the time. my friend at the shop laughed about it for 6 months. well so did i...lol
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
That's funny. Mean, but funny. I guess you can look at it as karma--the guy was rude so karma got him in the end, right? And I have had that happen with the wind before, but with a really heavy door on a minivan. It just pulled the door right from my hand. Luckily there was no one parked next to me at the time.
• Philippines
5 Dec 06
being a cop doesn't mean that you deserve more respect compared to civilians, the respect that they should be getting is the repect on their decisions based on laws while handling incidents. They should be treated equally, the only difference is that a cop is in the line of duty
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
I feel the same way. I can't stand cops that go on boasting about their jobs so everyone will be in awe of them, or whatever. It is a job. Yeah they risk their lives every day but it was their choice to be a cop. I respect them as much as they respect me (which with this guy wasn't much).
@Signal20 (2282)
• United States
4 Dec 06
I used to be a police officer, and I never ever would even think about flashing my badge, or letting someone now I was a cop when I wasn't on duty. I despised and still do those guys (sorry, but that's usually who it is is men) that have to throw that into every conversation they have. What it is, it's a power trip to them, and they're world revolves around them being a cop. That's their whole identity. When they're that bad off duty, they're even worse when they're on duty. It's an ego trip for them. Someone told me once, most cops were picked on as kids, that's why they become cops to pick on people lol. I honestly think it's true for some. I remember working one night, this one guy was being the biggest a-hole to one of our civilian employees, I got involved, big a hole to me, he wouldn't give me his name, but said he was a supervisor at our county sheriff's office. So I had our dispatch run his tag to get his name. Then called my lieutenant out. He called over to the sheriff's commander, turned out the guy was only a reserve officer (basically your unpaid "volunteer" officer). My LT handed him the phone and told him it was the shift commander, he got all ohhh, why'd you do that? It was funny, but my point is a lot of times, they'll make themselves out to be bigger then what they are. A lot of times, you'll find they're only security officer's pulling that. I've seen that a bunch of times as well, or else they'll be retired police officer's. Next time, if it happens again, if you want to shut them up, calmly ask them what department they work for, and what their name is. They'll be all cocky at first and tell you the department. May not give their name, just write down the tag #. Then after you get home, I'd call the chief/sheriff and file a complaint about their piss poor behavior. Then follow it up with a letter. If you don't get anywhere, move up and call the mayor or county commissioners office. S**t rolls down hill, I guarantee he'll hear about it. I'd still call and see if he works at one of your local departments, if so you could file a complaint. I would, and I have before.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
Thanks for you perspective from the other side. It does seem a lot of cops have some superiority complex. My uncle was a state trooper but I don't remember him ever acting that way. He was so down to earth.
• Pakistan
4 Dec 06
i m a cop and i am proud of being
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
That's great--but would you have been so rude in this situation? Do you think you deserve more respect because you are a cop?
@blueman (16516)
• India
5 Dec 06
i do think being a cop in someway puts in a good position of respect, and i do not think that because of the person but because the authority which comes with the uniform.
1 person likes this
@nandusha (154)
• India
5 Dec 06
i hate this people ,it is wrightthey protects us but it is not for fee they are payed for it from our tax,if they were doing a sevis for free then it is fine they need more respect then it is ok
1 person likes this
• Austria
5 Dec 06
It does not mean that way. All must be equal. And i dont think one deserves more respect than the other. I think we just have to respect each other like humans and not treat each others like animals.
1 person likes this
@gewcew23 (8012)
• United States
5 Dec 06
I've known some cops and even reserve cops who didn't believe they were above the law then I also know some who thought they could get away with murder because of what they were. Heck I've even heard of one who got away with drunk driving. I think you were right to be upset with the rudeness of the man. As long as your husband apologized I think he should have accepted it and gone on.
1 person likes this
@edelweiss (1930)
• India
5 Dec 06
Cops are really a pain in the @$$$$$$$$!
1 person likes this
• Hong Kong
5 Dec 06
I think he just want to emphasis the importance of him being a cop by treating others rude,and I guess he's low-estee.But don't take it personaly.He's just a bad cop/
@calvin222 (1607)
• India
5 Dec 06
cop - cop
Cops get used to throwing their weight around. they should undergo courses in humility. just bcoz someone is a cop doesnt make him out of the ordinary.
1 person likes this
@bobster (219)
5 Dec 06
its probably more to do with the fact he was an as*hole than he's a cop. i would've been tempted to take his name and cop id and report him. (I hold grudges) You made me laugh with this one though - good for you and your hubby for staying calm.
1 person likes this
@YoMomma1 (922)
• United States
5 Dec 06
key words here are OFF DUTY! that means he gets the same respect as a regular person. He is not an authoritive person while off duty, he cant arrest while off duty. If it was that big a deal to him, he shouldve exchanged insurance info and then went about his business. what was he doing just sitting in his car anyway? waiting for someone to harrass?? lol good luck to you
@sghuru (13)
• India
5 Dec 06
we cant say all the cops are so rude or they boss around the locality.Only some of them bring some bad name.Such cops must be immediately reported.
1 person likes this