Grieving Mom

@Kylalynn (1773)
South Africa
December 7, 2006 4:50pm CST
My mom has moved in with us 7mths ago after my father passed away. During her life she has lost a 22yr son, a 31yr son, a 15mth grandson. Now after my fathers death, and moving from her own surroudings, she is very depressed. I try lots to cheer her up and also allow her time alone to grieve. Yesterday my late fathers brother died. This has really upset her all over again. Any suggestions to get her out of this deep depression that she is hiding so well. Thankyou!
6 people like this
14 responses
@kgwat70 (13396)
• United States
8 Dec 06
Right now you are helping her a lot by being there for her and allowing her to live with you. I would be devastated too if I lost so many family members, especially her kids. It has to be so hard on her and hope that she will be okay. Try and get her out of the house as much as possible. The more she stays home the more depressed she will get. Do you have any funny movies that you all can watch or a comedy club to go to? Keep her busy somehow and moving around so she has something else to think about.
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
Her grandson has just picked her up to take her out for an hour. I like your idea of comedies. Going to get some. Thankyou so much for your kind response.
@satya26 (65)
• India
8 Dec 06
I think we all know the universal truth...that nothing is permanent in this world. Every one does there job and leaves from here...is natural that we do feel bad for some time...but is all about a life cycle game...I think ur mom knows it better too...just spend some time with her when ever u r free and try to make her happy ...that's it
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
Thankyou for your response.
@Glenn2007 (235)
• United States
8 Dec 06
Keep on spend time with her and keep Trying to Cheer her up maybe one day she will Put a Smile on her face tell her Rememeber all the good times with her Hubby :-)
1 person likes this
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
Hopefully she will get back to her cheerful self. Thankyou for responding.
• India
8 Dec 06
i am sorry for you mother,,,,,,, i think she has suffered a lot in her life, good that you have brought her with you, i think she needs time and i am sure she will come out of these traumas. you need keep all the bad news away from her and make her feel shes alright............... give her hope and love, shes gonna be fine soon
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
Thankyou for your positive response. Take care!
@Signal20 (2281)
• United States
8 Dec 06
Try and get her into counseling. Does she go to church? If so you could check with them and see if they have anything. Try and get her involved in activities with people her age that she can relate to. That's so sad for her, but she can't give up, and that's almost what it sounds like she's doing. Best wishes to you both!!
1 person likes this
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
You and Gifana have both mentioned, people of her own age. I am really going to try and get her involved with people her own age. I think that could be the answer. Thankyou very much for your response.
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
8 Dec 06
If the depression is serious I would try to get her to a doctor. She might need some help. I would also try getting her out of the house more and involved in activites. Does she have any hobbies?
@Kylalynn (1773)
• South Africa
8 Dec 06
She has just started making jewellery. She spends about 2hrs a week doing this, at home. It's not much but at least something. I am hoping she will do more, such as Christmas gifts etc. Thankyou so much for responding.
@navinshan (3940)
• Canada
8 Dec 06
Just yesterday i had heard a bad news that my granddad had passed away, since then we all are upset, i know that depression can be relieved if u share it with some one, and time is the healer, everything would be fine soon
1 person likes this
• Greece
8 Dec 06
walk together in the park
1 person likes this
@kawillow74 (1417)
• United States
8 Dec 06
I can't even imagine what she is going though the lost of a child I think is the greatest lost of all then her spouse wow she is very lucky to have you some people have nobody if she could get out with some old friends or talk to other people sometime parents feel like a borden talking to there kids. Get here out that might help as well sitting around lets her think about it all the time. I wish both of you the very best luck.
1 person likes this
@crystal8577 (1470)
• United States
8 Dec 06
Make sure you listen to her if she wants to talk. My mom lost her mother a few years ago & it about devastated her. Besides for talking when she needed it, I wrote her a letter letting her know how much I cared. My mom knows I love her, but it helped her to be able to see it on paper. She let me know how much that letter meant to her. We all deal with grief in our own way. It is good to give her some space & time.
1 person likes this
@warn810 (494)
• United States
8 Dec 06
Hope everything turns out ok for her.
1 person likes this
@mbs730 (2152)
• Canada
8 Dec 06
Wow I am so sorry, that is so much to deal with. I think the best thing right now is to give her time alone. She isn't ready to move on and she needs that time to grieve. When she is ready to move on, she will reach out to you. Just be there for her and listen to her. Again, I am so sorry.
1 person likes this
• Singapore
8 Dec 06
I am sorry to hear about this... maybe you can use colour and aromic therapy...this will help her relax and calm down...it relieve her stress and grievness in her mind...i would suggest using some gentle and relaxing colours like green and blue...if ahe do not want to go out...just let her sit beside the window and look at trees and the sky...give her some time alone...brown can help stabalize her too...for aromic therapy...also use some relaxing smell...like lavender ...light up some candles of green, blue or brown..use colours and smell together to help her... getting her engage in some activities will help tremendously too...maybe you can ask her to do some handicraft...or engage her to help in some charity...when she has someone to help...maybe she would not need someone to help herself...this is call healing yourself... hope that she can get over this soon...i know this is hard...but in this world...who will not die?? it's a matter of time...this is all in her mind...family members would be heir support..stand by her and help her recover...
@loveboy (671)
• India
8 Dec 06
my mother moving from own