i'm mad!
By joshdale08
@joshdale08 (2320)
Philippines
December 10, 2006 9:55pm CST
i just had an argument with my husband and i'm so pissed off! when i started doing my christmas list, he told me we're going to do it simply this year, no expensive gifts, no catered food. so, i looked for practical, inexpensive gifts for his godchildren and for our combined family. not to mention for his employees and some close neighbors. and i started stocking up on food staples i'll need for the food i will prepare for when his family comes for noche buena. just this morning, he called me from the office to excitedly inform me that he bought a motorcycle. i was silent for a long time. we already have an suv, we certainly don't need a motorcycle. and he's not the type, too, to be riding around in one! just what was he thinking? am i suppose to watch how i spend while he buys anything he wishes to buy? at a time like this, too? ooooohhhh!!! i'm so mad!
88 responses
@dexterous21 (1180)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
So sorry to hear that. You just have to calm down and talk to him personally and explain the pros and cons of what he did. I think everything will be fine if you both just put your ego down.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
yes, we talked and he tried justifying his purchase and i argued some more and he explained some more.... and i lost! can't do anything anymore about it coz we can't return it.thanks for your input, though.
and sonysacademy, you're right. you'll learn a lot from the discussions here, not only with this particular one. my advice, never take your gf/wife for granted coz if you do, it's the easiest way to destroy trust.
@sonysacademy (3)
• United Arab Emirates
11 Dec 06
amazing train of thoughts running around...i think am getting a bit enlightened abt how a wife feels and goes thru ....abt these petty things...and tell u wht....am planning to tie the knot wid my GF nxt month....these discussions i see will help me stay alert on how she'll feel wid all d trifle things i do...cos never evr i'd want to hurt her anyhow.....
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
11 Dec 06
He said he wasn't buying expensive gifts for anyone else, he didn't say he wouldn't for himself. I know I would be so pissed off too. My exhusband did that to me once. He went to Best Buy to buy a pack of CDs and got a Best Buy card and bought a $2,000 laptop. What really made me mad was that we very very strapped for cash trying to pay off our debt and he put us in more debt. What is wrong with these guys??
That kind of BS isn't acceptable. You should make him return the motorcycle.
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
11 Dec 06
LOL, can you afford the car though? If so buy yourself something very nice!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
ha, ha! if only we could. here in the philippines, what we buy we keep or exchange but not return. maybe, i'll just buy something for myself, too. a car, perhaps?
@BellasmamaTiff (2544)
• United States
11 Dec 06
I too would be very upset about this. I feel that he should have discussed it with you before making a purchase that large, especially after telling you to cut back on what you were spending! Huggers to you.....I am on your side! Lol....
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
correct! though he mentioned it once, i just didn't think he'd follow thru after he told me to be frugal. thanks for the vote of confidence!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
oh, that's a nice one! i'd love a diamond for a present! he, he!
@mansha (6298)
• India
12 Dec 06
I think he needed you to save for the sake of bike and didn't want to tell you about it too.But its really too bad you know just skip gifving presnts to his side of the family explaining to him that you didn't get anything for anyone as he asked you to be frugal so just bought yourself a diamond as a present from him.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
very practical. now that i've slept on it, doesn't seem so bad after all. and we're okay now. thanks for your concern.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
husbands... what should we do with them and yet, how can we live without them? he, he!
@sanell (2112)
• United States
11 Dec 06
OMG I know how you feel, I have times where all I do is bargain bargain bargain, shop so thrifty and the like, and then the next minute I turn around and he has bought something expensive it makes my head spin, but I just stay silent and do not say much because at this point he actually has agreed to let me start my own home based business and that I can not be more than grateful for...I am so excited about it and not that he woudl not have let me do it before hand it is just that his mom got into a lot of them and failed miserably so he was worried that i would do the same but I am doing well and he loves it now...so anyway, that is ridiculous if my husband bought a motorcycle I would tell him that he could not live here with that thing at all!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
lol! there's no telling what i'll do when he comes home for lunch, which is any minute now. but thanks for making me laugh!
@soldenski (2503)
• United States
12 Dec 06
My husband bought my son, for his fourth birthday a new Kawasaki Quad. That was last year, last week, he came home with a Honda 50 motorcycle for our five year old. That boy has 2 motorcycle's. And I still have to watch what I buy, NO WAY!!!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
omg, a motorcycle for a toddler! i didn't even want one for my husband, how much more for the kids! no way.
@pusiket (1756)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
Christmas is sometimes equated to giving. But let us not forget that it is not that all, we should also learn to understand one another.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
yeah, and thanks for putting back the perspective of things.
@epizzahut (2078)
• China
12 Dec 06
i know your feeling. but you shoud see th positive, maybe you think the motorcycle is useless, but he don't think so, like child love their toys we can't say it is useful of useless.
@rms2727 (815)
• India
11 Dec 06
I think there is something seriously wrong with your husband, why is he asking you to cut out on your celebrations while at the same time he's going on buying some expensive motorcycle which has practically no use for any of you in the family.
how about discussing things out and finding out why he is behaving so strangely
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
11 Dec 06
or maybe he's husband's been telling her to cut short this year's budget because he's been planning all this time to buy the motorcycle. but still rude of him not to tell his wife about his plan.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
now, you've got me thinking along those lines..... hmmmmm...... know what, that could be a reason, too. but, it's been over a day now and it's water under the bridge now, so to speak. so i'm letting it go till the next time he'll do it again. he, he!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
they never will, i guess! but inviting him in here? no way! this is my own private domain and he's not allowed here!
@dementia88 (900)
• United States
11 Dec 06
men are so notorious for crap like that i swear. my fiance was telling me how we need to save and not go crazy with the kids presents or family, then COMES home with an xbox 360 and 3 games and an xtra controller. granted not as expensive as a motorcycle, but same concept,.!!
then yelled at me when i bought a pair of ear plugs for 5.99.. seriously this is all based on true events
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
oh, don't you just love to wring their necks and knock some sense into their heads? grrr!
@jenniem (89)
• United States
11 Dec 06
Oh, I would be so mad too. He cant except you to go stingy then go himself an expensive new toy. My boyfriend made a similar decision without asking me when he bought a jetski. He used it maybe 5-7 times and its now sitting in our garage. Granted its winter, but I don't think much will change when summer rolls around again. I think financial decisions such as that should involve both people in the relationship.
@seriousmiss (39)
• Canada
11 Dec 06
Wow some men never cease to amaze us with their total lack of judgement and plain common sense. What are you supposed to do now, act happy for him, put on your bicker chick outfit and become his ride-or-die-chick now. That is a tough one because maybe he is having a midlife crisis, that is all I can think of after the 180 degree behavior from his discussion with you. You are quite right to be angry but try to enjoy your holidays nevertheless. Good luck to you both.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
oh, he's gonna pay alright! i'm asking him for a new car! get that! he, he!
@ameetiyer (18)
• India
11 Dec 06
I too would be very upset about this. I feel that he should have discussed it with you before purchasing it!!
Just don't worry ...all will be fine!!!!
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
11 Dec 06
everything's fine now. he treated me to dinner. a peace offering perhaps?
@ljmc24 (413)
• United States
11 Dec 06
I feel your pain. Our motorcycle about kills me sometimes with the upkeep. I am supposed to watch our finances and he can just whip out that card and charge several charges a day, his excuse is I thought you said we had so and so in the bank. Well that was before he made 5 2-5 charges. Those add up and I don't think he realizest that.
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
guess we have to start re-educating our husbands about basic math, right?
@metal333 (251)
• India
11 Dec 06
oh thats really bad...thats almost like the craziest thing i have ever heard...spending less for christmas,and buying a bike when u already have one...and that too at this time of the year..haha..thats really stupid...why would anyone do that...its like he is just thinking about himself althe time and not bout the family...man if i was u i would take the bike and burn it up right away...
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
nope, i'm taking the first ride, instead, when i figure out how to do it! he, he!
@LittleStars (318)
• United States
11 Dec 06
OHHH Boy...Hubby's head is gonna be on a platter tonite!
Why in the world would he go and buy something like that without discussing it with you first? And after everything he said to you about not spending alot for the holidays? MEN! They drive me crazy trying to figure them out ;)
@joshdale08 (2320)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
i've long since stopped figuring him out. let him figure me out for a change!
