Am I obliged to continue writing?

United States
December 26, 2006 9:14am CST
Hi, my mother has started an email campaign in which she is including many accusations and harmful words. Because I am at such a distance..my contact must remain only by mail or email.. I feel that to belittle one's daughter and continue to say how bad I am does not lend for building relationships. I have asked her not to write if we cannot write in a nice manner ..am I wrong?
6 responses
@bterrier (308)
• United States
26 Dec 06
I wouldn't cut off your only source of cumunicating. That could turn into who is going to write to who first! Try to be the better person over look the bad and be nice. Soon she may relise what she is doing and it will stop. Just my Thoughts
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 06
I am being worn down by all the negative writing though..Does God expect that?
@bterrier (308)
• United States
26 Dec 06
I'm not a very religious person so I can't anwser that question. But I can say when you take a negetive letter and ignore any bad things said, and return a joyfull letter, I would hope you feel good about what you have done. We all make mistakes and can't change the pass. But it's the person who learns a lesson and continues to move forward that will enjoy tommorrow.
@kellahinx (372)
• United States
26 Dec 06
I do not know your relationship with your mother, so that is hard to say. Has she always been mean to you, or is this a new thing? Perhaps she resents the fact that she can only talk with her daughter over email? I have know idea. Maybe you need to come up with a better form of communication. If she has just always been emotionally abusive to you, then you don't need to carry on that relationship. It is sad, but sometimes people don't know how to be mothers and then really you are stuck without one. You shouldn't pretend to love her if you don't.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 06
It is a continuation of the behavior she has had towards mine since my childhood..I want to be godly but not a scapegoat!
@msqtech (15226)
• United States
4 Jan 07
many parents never release the child into adulthood although the child is gone and an adult in their own right
@kgwat70 (13398)
• United States
26 Dec 06
I agree with you 100% that she should not write to you if she has nothing but bad things to say to you or about you. I am shocked that a mother would treat her daughter like that. That is just apalling to me and she is definitely not a very good mother. I am sorry that you are having difficulties with your mother still and hope that she will leave you alone unless she can be nice to you and love you like a mother should love her daughter.
• United States
27 Dec 06
please don't get me wrong..I love my mother..but lately all i have heard is how much more I should be doing..I failed with my niece and now after having made the long trip there ..not too long ago..I must feel guilty that I didnt drive down for Christmas..Or that I have opted to live way out here (away from all of the bickering) I know I must honor my mother..my father..is past..but should I take blame for things going wrong there..there are so many miles away from me. Thanks for your words
@marciascott (25555)
• United States
26 Dec 06
If this email is for me. I just thought I would get even with you, something you said in one of your discussions. I think you were reffering to me. so that's why I made a statement. the thing to do is talk about the problem first, then if you can't come up with a solution move on.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 06
I don't know how your response here has anything to do with my question..Getting even has nothing to do with the policies in mylot..and if this is what you are trying to do..let me know so that I can refer your point to mylot. I am having some mean comments sent to me via email. I am asking my friends to help me sort through my response.. Please don't post on my discussions if you can't be nice!
• Singapore
4 Jan 07
i dont think you are wrong..in fact, i would have do the same thing if im in your shoe...i will not want my own mother to belittle me like that to so many people...it's too mean and depressing
@msqtech (15226)
• United States
4 Jan 07
I dont think it is wrong to be hurt by it but I find it is often better to act as if her harsh things are unheard or unread and just stay in the social grace when dealing with such above the fray