Is 20 too young to get maried?

United States
September 29, 2006 5:13pm CST
I've never wanted to get married but my perception of life is different now.Are my dreams of my future changing because I'm getting older or because I'm in this other realm called love?
16 people like this
462 responses
• United States
29 Sep 06
i got married at 21 and im very happy i dont think it is too young if your happy
3 people like this
• India
4 Oct 06
20 i think is a little young 2 get married ! ...and that also depends on each persons maturity ! ..and understanding ! ...but normally a guy or a gal at age 20 prefer 2 hangout and party ! ..and enjoy with friends !...and also 2 make luv ! ..bt then they r not mature enuff 2 face the world ! ..if they had 2 !! by themselves ! ...rite ...considering a person who has stablised his life by getting a job !! ...and made the life safe 4 him and his spouce ! ..
3 people like this
@all_n_one (2005)
• United States
16 Oct 06
Yes 20 is to young to get married i'd have to say. You'll be happy at first but run into so many problems down the road that's why you should wait. Dating is different you don't have to expect so much because you haven't said vows infront of god. I'm not knocking ppl who do just saying they should wait but nowadays most marriages don't last but even less when there younger. I'd wish you the best tho
• India
16 Oct 06
20-21 is the perfact age for marriege n for sattelment..
3 people like this
@Trook1233 (196)
30 Sep 06
No, 20 isn't to young to get married. If you are in love and you know that you want to spend the rest of your life with this person, then age isn't a factor. I got married at the age of 16 and my husband and I are more happy then ever.
3 people like this
• United States
4 Oct 06
Thanks and congrats to both of the couples that left the above comments. Wish u the best in the years to come =)
2 people like this
• India
4 Oct 06
at 16 u got married mindy ?? ..ohh !! ...that sounds really immature !...u r immature in ur thought itself ! ...
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Oct 06
Nothing about her thought was immature. Practically everybody else that replied to the post agrees with her. If you know what you want and are sure, the decision lies with that person. (I was surprised by the "16" thing, though. I thought a person had to be 18 to marry.)
@1alyssa (758)
• United States
29 Sep 06
i think it is different for different people it depends in what direction you want your life to go i got married when i was 16 and i think that was the best thing for me to do but i was ment to be a mother and a wife that is the life i have choosen i still finished high school and college but i love being a wife and a mother my cousin is 28 and she has never gotten married or had children she loves to party and that is the life she chose i think it just depends on the person
3 people like this
@tessie (50)
• Nigeria
4 Oct 06
For me there is nothing wrong in early marriage, i think that is the best time for any lady to get married and after having your children, you continue with life. But if you get married late, when will you have time to enjoy life. So early marriage is the best.
• United States
4 Oct 06
Age should not be the question. More maturity. From everything you've said, it sounds like the real thing. And it would be great to have the military benefits so you can enjoy yourselves a bit more without the financial burden. I got married at 19... to my best friend of 5 years. We didn't date at all.. we had a fantastic friendship we were afraid to ruin with a relationship, but we decided to jsut go for it. And it was the best decision I've ver made. I was Daddy's little girl.. only child, over-protected, perfect child.. and my parents were dissapointed. Very dissapointed. But they got over it. I wasn't going to live my life for them. Now we're still going strong. One little boy, and a baby on the way. And you can always finish school. I'm in college now. I did put it on hold for awhile when I got pregnant the first time, as will I stop for at least a semester after I have this baby. But in the time we live in today there should be no question of you finishing school to hold you back in your parents eyes. And the military will even pay for it! And as much as we would like it to not happen, if something goes wrong, you can get a divorce. It's not a crime. I'm pro-divorce in certain situations. People who get married because they have a child together and stay together ven though they dont' get along anymore are bad parents in my eyes. The child would be much better off seeing the parents seperatly in lvoing situations then together in a hostile one. Granted you don't have kids though together now Im assuming because you didn't say so. But no age, or repricutions from your family shoudl sway your decision to get married. Follow your heart!
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Oct 06
Thank you for responding. I know I should follow my heart...and my heart is telling me that im ready and my boyfriend is THE ONE.not to mention my mind is telling me the same. I just start questioning my thoughts and try to imagine every possible outcome that can happen, good or bad. Your words are encouraging and I appreciate hearing your thoughts. I need to be reminded at times to live my own life and to stop living my life for anyone else, even my family.I'll definitly comment when I have a final decision and how everything turns out. How did u tell ur parents the news?
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Oct 06
I didn't tell them. I chickened out. I showed up at their house wearing a wedding ring. Then they noticed. And now my family and his wants us to have a 'real wedding' so they can all be there. We just went and got the ring and my name changed. I question myself like that too, but until it's over and one with you can't know all the possible outcames.
• United States
16 Oct 06
I agree, age shouldn't be the question. As long as you are ready I think you should go for it.
@zah_13 (124)
• India
1 Oct 06
18 or 20, 22 or 32 , whatever age you may be, as long as your mind tells you you are young you are, every person has onesself and its what makes them , thier wishes, thier likings, their choices, their dreams, thier character and mostly themselves, and these all are to be at its prime state when a man or a women to make a choice to get married, because by marrying you are no longer on your own you will have to be a part of another persons body and soul thats what i mean by marriage and hence for a person to get married he just need to find a rite mate and when the time come he will choose.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Oct 06
MY mind isnt telling me Im too young but everyone else in my life is...I understand where they are coming from though. I just love my family dearly and Im pretty sure this might disappoint them. I've never really disobeyed my parents wishes ever. In fact I can count on 1 hand the times ive been in trouble since my very first memories, so disapointment...I dont know if I can handle doing that to them.My family is my world. Id do ANYTHING for them!!!! How do I tell them...Should I wait til my boyfriend officially proposes? or should I slowly throw them hints so he can do it properly and ask my parents for permission?
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Oct 06
I was 20 when I married my husband almost 40 years ago. My mother was not happy when we got married, but you have to go with what feels right for you. We can give you all the advise in the world, but it ultimately comes down to what you want to do and feel is right. No one else can make this decision for you. What I would do is ask myself how I would feel if this person was no longer in my life. If you decide to go ahead and get married, be sure that you're both committed to making it work. There will always be problems, but you need to work together to solve those problems. When you start getting upset about some habits he has remeber why you married him in the first place and decide if the habit is really that important, or if you need to talk with him about it. Compromise is the name of the game, you both need to be able to accept the decision.
@bhchy1 (6052)
• United States
30 Sep 06
All depends on both your maturity level and the relationship..is it new? High school sweetheart? do you know realistic side of marriage...bills, compromise etc? Some people are ready at 20...most from my experience are not.
1 person likes this
@neon2000 (2762)
• Philippines
16 Oct 06
Yes you are in realm, you are still too young. Enjoy your relationship with your boyfriend. Get to know him even more each day then you can decide if day by day, or years past, the feeling is still the same then you can get married.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Oct 06
your both mature young adults. age has little to do with it. how ever you do have a problem. why is he going backl in to the millitary? it will be too hectic for either of you to get an education,because its a full time job. iv ben there,my kids are there now ,he cant go to school and be on acctive duty,its just too hard. and if he is transfured a lot you wont be about to finnish either. if you want to get married ,ok,,but dont go into the milltary,looking for an easy life .or a education,theyr not intrested it that part of your life,,and they wont make accomidations for it.
@dulheraja (436)
• United States
30 Sep 06
I don't think so.
1 person likes this
• India
4 Oct 06
No. Due to unmature life.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Oct 06
No 20 isn't too young, marriage, again is based on the person. If you're 20 and you know you aren't mature enough too get married and settle down then yes, it is too young. My parents have been married since my mom was 15 and they've been married 20+years. Love changes a lot of things, the way you view life is def one of them.
1 person likes this
@harry_ndhuz (1276)
• Indonesia
24 Oct 06
I was 22
1 person likes this
@nabeela21 (168)
24 Oct 06
Yep it is too eraly. U shud think about ur career at this stage rather than marriage. U've got all ur life to get married. U shud stick to the freedom now rather than having ur hubby tell u wat to do.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
24 Oct 06
Yes. Opportunities in that age are not yet arriving. Well if u dont want to be succesful in ur life so be it!!! So girls live your life to the fullest for the glory of GOD...marriage at the age of 20 is a no no thing!!!!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
24 Oct 06
its never too young for a person who is mature and responsible enough.. as long as you really love that person and you thought twice on that decision, then go for it... its a case to case basis, actually.
1 person likes this
@disturbedgd (1822)
• South Africa
24 Oct 06
no some people get married at 18 and have a very happy and succesful life
1 person likes this
@pina_land (250)
• Singapore
24 Oct 06
In this day and age, 20 is too young to get married. But, its okay. Nobody can object to it. age 20 is already a legal age to get married isn't it??
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Oct 06
i would say yes, but every persons situation differs. some say internet love don't last,and that it can't be true love!!!!!. let me tell ya' I met my wife 4 yrs ago on the net.We've been married very happlily for 3 yrs now!!
1 person likes this
@uzaircs (2320)
• Sharjah, United Arab Emirates
24 Oct 06
i give no idea
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Oct 06
If you are in love and you've been with your partner for a long time, then the next step in an relationship is to get married. Marriage is about love and commiment to another person, it takes time and effort. but if you love someone you it doesnt seem that bad.
1 person likes this
@somesh1984 (1299)
• India
16 Oct 06
i dont think so .......20 is a nce age to marry
1 person likes this
@Rajeshs (125)
• India
16 Oct 06
no.it is not.. for men,25 is the best age
1 person likes this
@tvnaresh (1583)
• India
16 Oct 06
yes
1 person likes this