long distance relationship.....how'd you deal with it?

Philippines
January 6, 2007 6:55am CST
My boyfriend recently went somewhere far from here for our better future. I was reluctant at first and had extreme difficulty adjusting to this type of relationship because we used to spend time together almost everyday. This time would be the first and longest that we're gonna be apart from each other. But as time went by, i realized that i should make sacrifices and not only think of my own. It's tough and never easy....but i tried adjusting. I just....deal with it now...i don't know how well..yet.., but i'm dealing nonetheless. It maybe hard for me but I know it's a lot harder for him too... Thinking of the good things to come in return of our sacrifices, sharing the trust, keeping the promise made bound by our love (not all promises are meant to be broken, as others may say, as long as love and sincerity comes along with it) and most importantly keeping the faith in GOD...will make it easier for us until the day GOD will make us whole again...for GOD will never take away what HE has already planned. notes to ponder: "and ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation" ---Kahlil Gibran "if you truly care for someone as much as you do, then why care about a thing like "DISTANCE"?" "distance never separates two hearts that really care. for memories span the miles and in seconds we are there." "missing someone gets a little bit easier everyday coz' even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will" "DISTANCE BETWEEN TWO HEARTS IS NOT AN OBSTACLE, RATHER A GREAT REMINDER OF JUST HOW STRONG TRUE LOVE CAN BE"
4 people like this
47 responses
@Brandi06 (2228)
• United States
6 Jan 07
i don't think that they work out
1 person likes this
@Reviver (339)
• Romania
6 Jan 07
yep...
1 person likes this
• India
7 Jan 07
Yes its true that this kind of realtionship work,but totally depends on person to person and the depth of their relationship.Most of them give up in due time....
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
well, everyone's entitled to their own opinion but id be happy to know one day that you'd end up with someone happily ever after :)
@arentcity (317)
• Indonesia
7 Jan 07
never work !! it will be fail..believe me..
@020905 (101)
• Malaysia
7 Jan 07
It works for me....you just have to be faithful t each other...
• Indonesia
6 Jan 07
I have a bf live in other city. He works there and we can only met once every 3 months. we used to be together everyday. But 2 years ago he had to move to another city cause of his job. At fist it was a little bit a difficult time for me. But So far its ok..its just the matter of trust and honesty to each other. And we will be married this July..
@Giul81 (10)
• Italy
7 Jan 07
i don't belive in distance love...
• Australia
31 Jan 07
my husband and i were separated for almost 9 months due to some family obligations. we were constantly on the phone and via webcam everyday. we send each other cards each week, we send tons of text msgs all the time, we both kept a journal on our relationship and our daily thoughts, we send over gifts and lil pressies all the time. i think the most important things in LDR are trust and faith and heaps of love. :) just look forward to the next time u see one another again. good luck with urs. :)
@elisa812 (3033)
• United States
30 Jan 07
I know how you feel...my fiance is in the army, so we rarely get to see each other. We just make sure to set aside as much time as we can in the evenings to talk on the phone, and we also chat online sometimes too. Sometimes we play games over the internet, so that way it feels like we're doing something special together even though we can't actually be in the same place. It's really hard, but after awhile, you get used to being away from each other and it's not so bad. It just makes the times that you are together extra special! My fiance and I dated long distance for a couple years, and now we're planning our wedding, so it can definitely work out if it's supposed to! I'm glad to see that you have your faith in God, and that will definitely help you through! Just keep hanging on to that and remember that it gets better with time! Good luck! :)
• United States
30 Jan 07
I have the exact same situation right now and it's really hard. I try and keep myself busy but I miss him a lot. The thing is to talk when you can and have something to look forward to.
• United States
7 Jan 07
It can be hard, but I'm used to it. Sometimes I get so lonely I cry though. My boyfriend of 6 years is 2k miles from me. But we have an awesome loving relationship. He's the best man I've ever had, so I deal with it. We will be together soon. If I had my choice we'd definately be together, and I would never want to be long distance from him again.
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
You'll just have to trust each other and learn to divert your attention towards things that interest you, and can take your mind off the thoughts of missing your partner. Also, you have to think positive and consider your long distance set-up as beneficial for both of you. (Reasons: it makes you two miss each other so much; longing for each other maintains the "magic" in your relationship; you two can grow and be exposed to various things that you can share with each other and talk about once he returns.)
@zipporah (151)
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
go with hi where he is... if u cant...emails, chats and phonecalls are the best way to keep in touch. communication is important. No matter what the time it is there.. it is always important for you to adjust based upon his free time. I have an online relationship and we were always chatting and talking each time he is has a free time at work.. it will work u guys just need to settle it down and talk abt your schedules.... and if one fall -out-of love just lt one suffers and not just give some lame excuses abt being busy or whatever. But other than that... it will work.. specially if love is there.. above high i belive in true love and faith. No matter where u are. Love survives! and also...try to update him every once in a while. send pictures...!
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
it tough but we all have the strength to go through life. do not challenge life by adding distractions to it. do not tempt yourself. try to avoid stuff that could make you sin. i know how its like. and jsut to share, i have been with my girl for almost a year now. and she became my girl even though we stopped seeing each other for about 3 weeks. so that makes us 8 months together as a couple and 8months and 3 week of not seeing her. but i love her still and nothing will take me away unless she wants me to go... so far she doesnt and im glad she hasnt.
• India
7 Jan 07
thts a nice question....... infact i liked ur post very much. one of my friend also live in abroad but we r still in contact with each other through orkut.... i.e www.orkut.com
@DavidReedy (2411)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I've never really known any long distance relationships to work--not past a few months anyway. I wish you the best of luck, keep the faith.
@glasser3 (354)
• Hibbing, Minnesota
7 Jan 07
Well i am currently in involved in a long distance relationship that has gone on for over 6 months and sometimes i have to admit it is hard but we get through it and i think our love grows for each day we are apart and hopefully soon we wont be apart anymore as im looking to move to that area soon. But all in all ive taken part in a couple of long distance relationships and for the most part they are bust but this one has worked out great so far and i hope it continues to go that way.
• United States
7 Jan 07
im in between a long distance relationship too..i knwo its hard enough for the both of us..but i do know that sumday, everything wil b worth waiting..
• United States
7 Jan 07
Long distance relationships are tough. I had one when I was in high school (my girlfriend went away to college). Unfortunately it did not work out but we still remain friends today. My opinion on long distance relationships (sorry to be negative) is that a huge part of relationship is physical - touching, seeing, kissing, etc. Without that it is hard to maintain the inner burning. We are hard-wired from our evolution to need that human face to face contact. People 300 years ago did not have phone, email, etc. Their relationship revolved around face to face contact. So in today's society it is possible but our genetic code needs that physical aspect. This is why people cheat, flirt, accuse, etc. I think it is all manifestations of our need for physical contact in a relationship.
@runsgame (2034)
• India
7 Jan 07
DISTANCE BETWEEN TWO HEARTS IS NOT AN OBSTACLE, RATHER A GREAT REMINDER OF JUST HOW STRONG TRUE LOVE CAN BE" this statement is entirely true and i stock to your sense in this regard. thanks
@prasadr (872)
• India
7 Jan 07
Distance is not a problem in relation, because it is the mental bond which holds up the relations and not a physical one. So thats nota problem... IT just denies us from one or 2 senses only
• India
7 Jan 07
If u really love him the first question would be why don't u go over there and enjoy or i can say that this is the real test of your love.The suggestion would be try to get engaged in other work so that you do not get upset by thinking whole day about him. Don't forget the saying that distances make the love more strong.
• China
7 Jan 07
I am sorry to say thatI have also been in the same situation as you,but now we had Separated.At the beginning,we also belived eachother,believe that we can together can marry? With the passage of time, our feelings seem to be weakening, and finally have no contact point. Perhaps the feeling is not strong enough?
@hazeter (671)
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
i think it is very hard to have a long distance relationship. That is the truth, but if u want to work with it really then it is important to have communication always. Then trust and honestly. That is the most common to survive a long distance relationship.