Stress foster child wets bed, foster mother threatens to cut his weinny off?

@WebMann (4732)
Canada
January 6, 2007 9:49am CST
What goes on in the minds of foster parents? Why do they take foster children if they are going to scare them to death?
2 people like this
6 responses
@loved1 (5336)
• United States
23 Jan 07
This absolutely breaks my heart. It would be so easy for me to qualify as a foster parent because I am already a registered child care provider but I just don't think I could do it. I am so afraid of getting a child who has been treated this way, falling in love with them and then having the foster system shuffle them back to the abusive parents or a bad foster home. I think I would die a little bit each time that happened.
1 person likes this
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
23 Jan 07
It was a scary time for me. I really can't understand why they move little orphans around from home to home it just doesn't give the child any stability at all. I do remember one home I was in were they took in a little girl for the summer and let her go in the fall. It was heart breaking and I never could understand why. But life goes on and my weenie was left intact. Some glad about that. :) thanks for your comments Loved1, always good to see you.
@loved1 (5336)
• United States
24 Jan 07
That has to be very traumatic. Especially if you were very young when it happened. I can't imagine living this way. I think more than anything else kids need unconditional love from someone, anyone in their life.
@emskoneko (806)
• United States
6 Jan 07
I'm sure not all foster parents are like that. But for those that are like that they need some help and should rethink about taking in a child.
1 person likes this
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
6 Jan 07
Well that was me it happened to and I was terrified. I certainly don't agree with this type of strategy for stopping male bed wetters but that was the last time I ever wet the bed. She didn't just threaten me alone, she had the whole family and hired hands in the kitchen at the time. Embarrassing kids to get them to do the right things isn't right either. :)
@juls2me2 (2151)
• United States
23 Jan 07
That's just wrong and shouldn't be done.
@sbeauty (5870)
• United States
22 Jan 07
I was a foster parent for over 2 years, and we took John because we wanted to help him. It was a VERY difficult job. Foster children come with all kinds of baggage brought about by neglect and abuse, and many of them struggle with what is normal and correct in life, because every placement they've been in has different rules and routines. Therefore, they are very confused young people. This means that not everyone should even try to be a foster parent. It takes very special people to deal with their very special needs. Unfortunately, taking foster children also pays fairly well, especially for someone who takes a lot of children. The more handicapped or troubled they are, the more money is paid for their care. Some of these foster homes are just in it for the money. I met a number of them when I was attending my mandatory parenting classes as a foster parent. You could care they didn't have the interests of the children at heart in any way. It was just when am I going to get paid and when are they going to increase the payments and when is the clothing allowance going to come through? We treated John just like we did our own children and bought him the same quality clothes and shoes as they got. Some places spend nothing on the children and don't even feed them right. It makes me sick, but until someone comes up with a better system, states are desperate to place these children wherever they can.
1 person likes this
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
22 Jan 07
It's a sad thing but that's the case and people that shouldn't even have kids get them and treat them like dirt. Thanks for your great response SBeauty
1 person likes this
@xXmeganxX (4422)
22 Jan 07
well that's surely not right if she's going to scare the children, she could discipline them and then they will learn from it.
1 person likes this
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
22 Jan 07
Well I agree 100% I was terrified and of course all the others in the room thought it was really funny.
@feralwoman (2199)
• Australia
1 Mar 07
Howdy WM! Foster parents, IMO, should have an extra special duty of care to the child/ren they look after as they have usually suffered trauma of some kind. For a foster mother to do this is totally unacceptable - I thought to become a foster carer you had to go through a stringent checking process. Obviously in her case she must've fooled them all! lol
• United States
1 Mar 07
I don't think that is a good example of ALL foster parents. Most foster parents are doing it for the love and concern of children. (See http://www.baggageandbug.com for a shining example!) But you are right... how did a person like that end up as a foster parent?