Is the Title Boyfriend Appropriate????

@Bytemi (1554)
United States
January 6, 2007 7:00pm CST
I am in an interesting situation. I am the mother of a 3 year old little girl and have been divorced for 2 years. I am 31 years old and feel weird everytime I introduce my boyfriend as that. It makes me feel like I am in high school again running around hiding from my parents. Has anyone else experienced this? Am I weird. Is there something else that I could refer to him as that I am missing???
8 people like this
68 responses
@BittyBiddy (2905)
• Ireland
7 Jan 07
I know how you feel. I felt the same way when I was going out with my husband. And when we moved in together I felt worse. So I started calling him my "partner", but even that sounded odd and only marginally better than boyfriend. On a couple of occasions I introduced him as "the love of my life"? or "the man in my life", but this would have been to friends.
2 people like this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I have tried my Love and that did not help and yes now that we are living together it does feel even weirder. I tried calling him my partner once but he was not present and the person started to think he was a girl, so that is not going to work for me! Just out of curiousity, when/how did you decide to get married again (I am assuming you are divorced).
• Ireland
7 Jan 07
I split up from my ex six years ago. We weren't married (thank God for small mercies), and I married my husband in 2005. :)
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
So you didn't have the hateful divorce to make you bitter. Yes I am admitting that I am bitter.
1 person likes this
• India
7 Jan 07
I dont think you are weired, you are just uncomfortable, as you sticking too much on the Boyfriend phrase which keeps reminding you of your's high school days. I f you are that much uncomfortable then introduce him with his name and let people know he is the man in your's life right now.
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I guess I am not sure how to do that without using the boyfriend title, if that maes any sense.
• India
7 Jan 07
Why to much imphasises on boy thing? Cant he be yours friend and I trust people will see that he is a MAN!
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
It is not a man verses boy thing, it just feels weird to say.
@jenbatres (800)
• United States
7 Jan 07
You could introduce him as your male friend. I know what your saying about boyfriend, afterall he is a man not a boy.
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@ahsan15 (334)
• India
7 Jan 07
exactly correct!!!
1 person likes this
@Reviver (339)
• Romania
7 Jan 07
true...
@jwin2003 (242)
• United States
7 Jan 07
i think at that point in life you can just introduce him by name and most ppl will assume he is your boyfriend. just make sure you introduce other guy friends as "this is my friend so and so"
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
That is a good idea, I do have a lot of guy friends and I guess that is why I like to distingish between the two.
@shywolf (4529)
• United States
7 Jan 07
love and relationships - love and relationships
Wow. I am the same age as you and have no problem with the thought of calling someone my boyfriend. I guess that it is b because I've been shy for so long and haven't had many relationships, though. I guess that I still feel young inside. Young enough that that word doesn't seem strange to me. But I don't think that you are weird for feeling that way!^_^ To each their own. If you don't like calling him that, I'm sure that there are other words that you could use!^_^
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
Obviously you have never been married. I think that is why if feels so strange to me. I am a Mom and I have an ex-husband, I did not have to date for over 10 years and then all of the sudden I am thrown back out into the world of dating.
@yorgaki (678)
• Romania
7 Jan 07
Been divorced ? He is your ex-husband. It doesn't matter that you still date him and you have to introduce him to the other around you. Tell the truth. If your divorce was from his fault then people will understand that from his answer to that.
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I am not dating my ex-husband???? I am dating my boyfriend, for lack of a better word, still search for it.
@ilvrshn (463)
• United States
7 Jan 07
HA HA, it's funny because I thought I was the only one who thought this. Try saying, this is my MAN. I think after a certain age boyfriend sounds so high schoolish. And no youa re not weird.
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I am not the only one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I feel better. Man does not really sound like me, but I will give it a try and see how it feels. At what age do you no longer have a boyfriend???
@AskAlly (3627)
• Canada
7 Jan 07
no I do not think you are werid. I would feel awkward as well. Maybe you should just intoduce him by his first Name? You're both adults and I think most people would make the assumption that you are together I hope someone else has better advice
1 person likes this
@Bytemi (1554)
• United States
7 Jan 07
See that would feel weird to me too and you did not give bad advise, I appreciate the feedback. :D I think that I making it more awkward for myself by over analyizing it which of course is a bad habit of mine.
@shomomo (850)
• Israel
7 Jan 07
Never the less, he is your boyfriend, I don't see any other nicknames. Plus it's pretty common for someone mature to have a boyfriend
@itsyblue (72)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I am 52 and was married for 30 years and had a very bitter divorce so I can relate to you in that respect, but I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and he is so kind and wonderful (the complete opposite of my ex). I felt weird at first calling him my boyfriend, but now I am so proud to be with him I don't have a problem with it. Let people think what they want. Someday I may call him my husband if I ever get over my marriage hangup. My ex ruined my perspective of marriage and I am not sure I ever want to do it again, but for now we are both happy with the situation as BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND.
1 person likes this
@milagre (1272)
• Portugal
7 Jan 07
Im almost in the same situation. Im divorced, im older then you, and im living with the father of m secound child, "m boyfriend", we didnt married and when i introduce him i introduce him by his name (even if he introduce me as his wife, which im not!). The weird thing is when im talking about him to a person who doesnt know him, that i say the "m son's father". But i agree with you, its a bit weird.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Jan 07
u r right when u feel thaway when u introduce u r boy friend by mentioning boy friend. i would rather suggest u that u should refer him as just a firend and i dont think that should make u feel awkward any longer. i feel friend is more appropriate.
• United States
7 Jan 07
Have you asked "the gentleman you are residing with" what he would like to be called. Does he feel strange about the term boyfriend? That is a tough question - "Lover" is not good for people that are not really good friends, "room mate" makes people wonder if you are sleeping together (none of their business), "Half-side" - my friends use this, I think That sounds strange. When my dad would tease me about my guy friends, I would call them my "Friend boys". Maybe an earlier response would be best - "This is XXX." And go on with the conversation. Let them wonder or ask outright. Then you can explain in whatever way is appropriate.
1 person likes this
@audbhit (50)
• India
7 Jan 07
Just introduce him saying "he is my man" , and do feel it right as in reality he is your man.
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@vinod4net (628)
• India
7 Jan 07
no i do not think anything unusual here' there shouldnt be anyproblem though i think its just to do that with your mindset. You should try to forget ur past experiencec and try to take care of current one and act decisievely. Also i hope your boyfriend too might sometime feel a bit awkward to introduce you to his friends or relatives. similarly you might be feeling awkward only when you are introducing ur boyfriend to somebody who knew your husband
1 person likes this
@ESKARENA1 (18304)
7 Jan 07
the concept of boyfriend and girlfriend when dealing with adults has always struck me as odd, maybe we should instead speak of significant other which i have recently heard, does this one work better?
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
Well I am a guy so I think it is not wierd and I would be proud to hear that from my Girlfriend. And even you are already 31 or above it dosnt matter what you call him/her as long as you do not deny that you are together. You should not be ashame for there is nothing wrong with that.
1 person likes this
• India
7 Jan 07
i think it is preety fine. one should always cherish the childhood days and shoud revive the memories of the past by reapeting them. u call him with which name does'nt matter. the relationship u r sharing with him is more important.
• United States
7 Jan 07
I guess at a certain point in our lives we are ready to have husbands, instead of boyfriends. I've never heard anyone ashamed to call someone their husband before. I have a boyfriend, and I call him that. It would feel better if I could finally move on to him being called my husband though, since he might as well be. Boyfriend doesn't bother me too much, but I'd prefer husband.
1 person likes this
@suny1946 (275)
• China
7 Jan 07
No,it isn't.
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