Bill Gates Meets His Match

United States
January 6, 2007 8:10pm CST
The following is a conversation overheard as Bill Gates was moving into his new home. Bill: "There are a few issues we need to discuss." Contractor: "Ah, you have our basic support option. Calls are free for the first 90 days and $75 a call thereafter. Okay?" Bill: "Uh, yeah.. the first issue is the living room. We think it's a little smaller than we anticipated." Contractor: "Yeah. Some compromises were made to have it out by the release date." Bill: "We won't be able to fit all our furniture in there." Contractor: "Well, you have two options. You can purchase a new, larger living room; or you can use a Stacker." Bill: "Stacker?" Contractor: "Yeah, it allows you to fit twice as much furniture into the room. By stacking it, of course, you put the entertainment center on the couch.. the chairs on the table.. etc. You leave an empty spot, so when you want to use some furniture you can unstack what you need and then put it back when you're done." Bill: "Uh..I dunno..issue two. The second issue is the light fixtures. The bulbs we brought with us from our old home won't fit. The treads run the wrong way." Contractor: "Oh! That's easy. Those bulbs aren't plug and play. You'll have to upgrade to the new bulbs." Bill "And the electrical outlets? The holes are round not rectangular. How do I fix that?" Contractor: "Just uninstall and reinstall the electrical system." Bill: "You're kidding!?" Contractor: "Nope. Its the only way." Bill: "Well..I have one last problem. Sometimes, when I have guest over, someone will flush the toilet and it won't stop. The water pressure drops so low that the showers don't work." Contractor: "That's a resource leakage problem. One fixture is failing to terminate and is hogging the resources preventing access from other fixtures." Bill: "And how do I fix that?" Contractor: "Well, after each flush, you all need to exit the house, turn off the water at the street, turn it back on, reenter the house and then you can get back to work." Bill: "That's the last straw. What kind of product are you selling me?" Contractor: "Hey, if you don't like it nobody made you buy it." Bill: "And when will this be fixed?" Contractor: "Oh, in your next house--which will be ready to release sometime near the end of next year. Actually it was due out this year, but we've had some delays.."
4 people like this
20 responses
• United States
7 Jan 07
Man, this is too true. Microsoft does have some of the best software, but sometimes they can be really frustrating.
• United States
7 Jan 07
Yes they can. The down side with Microsoft is they have so many products makes for great jokes. I know of some companies that have one or two products and have problems. Microsoft has alot of them.
@imakella (668)
• United States
21 Jan 07
yea he met some of them .. may vista may add more
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
21 Jan 07
Yeah... that is funny and I have heard similar jokes before. However... to be fair... this did apply to older Windows versions like Windows 98. Since using Windows XP for the past two years, I had no problems at all. Many people don't know anything about computers and make mistakes. They just blame Microsoft for their refusal to learn anything. You only need to read people's questions about fixing their computer to quickly realise that they barely know where the switch on button is.
@akinov (196)
• Philippines
9 Jan 07
hihihihih have a nice day
• India
9 Jan 07
good one.
@abaskamal (149)
• Malaysia
7 Jan 07
Funny joke. It is related to windows OS the XP or Vista?
7 Jan 07
That's brilliant, and so true of Microsoft!
• Philippines
7 Jan 07
yeah i think thats right its really frustating specially when you cant buy it becoz of it expensive price
@babray06 (1787)
• India
7 Jan 07
Great one friend. It's so true about Microsoft. That is why I left using it. I use only open source software. Overall this post has turned into a great sources of beautiful jokes.
• Singapore
7 Jan 07
Woh, this is so real life to how they work, fixes and patches, delayed release date. Thanks for sharing
@anup12 (4180)
• India
7 Jan 07
I mean it is a great comedy but Micrososft produces some good software also
@vkbllm (474)
• India
7 Jan 07
Yo man! you are damn good.......... Nice humour you have got!!!! your judgements towards Bill Gates & Microsoft are very trUe. Any way keep on posting such stuffes!!!!!!!!! Great Work
• China
7 Jan 07
this is microsoft, this is bill gates... I think it is true that they have some very good softwares... but we often meeting many problems with Microsoftware...
@kastor003 (364)
• India
7 Jan 07
good joke.well it is partly true. these software companies make a lot of fuss about there producs. they always have some problems and just keep on telling , it will be fixed in next realease. they bring out new version each other day and make us believe it has a lot of features. but most of them are false..
@plantit1 (298)
• United States
7 Jan 07
Good joke but the joke is really on us, isn't it?
@JBD189 (345)
• India
7 Jan 07
That's quite a match - the dumbhead.
@nzk786 (453)
• India
7 Jan 07
Here is a similar one The World is about to end and so God beckons the President of the US, the Russian President and Bill Gates and tells them that theWorld is Coming to an End and so to informa all their people to be ready for it. The US President goes back and tells the People of US..Countrymen I have good news and Bad News. The Good News is that there is a GOD. The Bad news is that the World is Coming to an end and so be prepared to leave this lovely life you have been leading so far. The Russian President goes and tells his people. I have Bad news and Good News. The Bad News is that there is a GOD, the good news is that your suffering is soon coming to an end@! Bill Gates calls all employees of Microsoft and tells them, Folks I have good news and Better news. The Good news is that God thinks I am among the three most important people in the world. The Better news for all of you is that we wont need to Release Vista anymore!
• India
7 Jan 07
i dont have that much of knowledge about this.
@r0ck_r0ck (1953)
• India
7 Jan 07
WTF! dats funny!
• Thailand
7 Jan 07
hahahaha.. this is one great satire.. :D this really made me think of their Window Vista thing... keep moving .. LoL.. resource hogging... lmao XD... that's so much for Windows XP and stuff... :p